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Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,699 posts, read 41,742,544 times
Reputation: 41381
Quote:
Originally Posted by Berteau
We’re couples who broke up due to one person not wanting kids and the other wanting kids really in love? When I think in love, I think of doing anything for the other person. I am skeptical of if these people were really fully in love.
Compromise on a car? What the hell. Trade it in if you can’t stand it after a couple of years.
Move to your spouse’s hometown? Sure, with the right job offer and you can move again if you can’t stand it.
Kids? If you don’t like them you can...........
Yeah, that’s why you DONT compromise on this issue.
We’re couples who broke up due to one person not wanting kids and the other wanting kids really in love? When I think in love, I think of doing anything for the other person. I am skeptical of if these people were really fully in love.
So you believe that being in love with someone would mean doing something for that person that you don't really want to do?By doing that,that would show real love for that person?No...it means that you know 100% that you don't want children.This should be something that is talked about early in the relationship.
Some that thought they didn't want kids turn out to be a great , loving parent.
But some really, really mean they do not want children.
Thing is, you can't gamble with a kid's life and better to break up then to leave after the kid is born
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,962,945 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Berteau
I would think it would be incredibly hard to find someone who doesn’t want kids.
Not hard at all. I've never looked for women that didn't want kids, but most people I've dated haven't. My partner never has. I can only think of 2 in the last 5 years or so that did.
I would say the person who doesn’t want kids agrees to have one. You don’t always get what you want. That’s part of being in a relationship and not being single. If my wife wants to live in the city and I want To live in the suburbs I’m not going to break up with her.
The decision to have/not have kids is one thing I consider non negotiable in relationships. The example that you mentioned above ie where you live in no where comparable to deciding to bring another human being into this world. Some people just do not like kids and if they decide to have one just to please or keep a significant other that that can breed resentment which would eventually destroy the relationship and the child will suffer as well if they are never able to bond with them.
Sometimes love just is not enough. You can love someone a great deal, but find you are just not right for each other.
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