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I think it would be important to know for the guy if you were about to sleep with him. He should know so he can be careful, gentle, and go slow and at your comfort level. He should do those things regardless, it's just good for him to know so he can be extra careful.
Beyond that, no, nobody needs to know. In fact, I think it would be good to keep that information to yourself so you don't get seen as a 'conquest'. I guess some guys consider it to be a feather in their cap to take a girls virginity, and you don't want someone pursuing you just for bragging rights.
Totally agree with this. Some guys will see it as a challenge.
Well, most of the time I agree with you but not in this case. To me, you will always remember your first and you want it to be a good memory. Don't do it with someone who places no value on it at all.
This is exactly what I'm talking about when I say people romanticize "the moment" too much. It puts way too much pressure on two human beings.
While I have my doubts about the authenticity of the OP, it's clear she's not going to just sleep with some random guy.
However, even if the stage is set for romance, it won't always be like a movie scene. It's often unfamiliar and awkward territory. If she builds herself up for a magical loving experience on clouds while birds are singing in the background then she's really going to be disappointed when her back hurts, he's leaning on her hair, and her vajayjay makes a funny noise.
Honestly, I don't even remember my very first time. I was with a boyfriend I loved, but it was not THE moment that mattered. I DO remember many more incredibly loving, sexy and romantic times when I connected with a partner once I'd become more sexually experienced than the time I lost my virginity.
Insisting that it has to be a big deal often only leads to disappointment.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Grlzrl
Have a couple of drinks and you will be fine.
How will that help her remember the magic moment??
So, many of those are discretionary activities. It looks like you have chosen not to date.
Why?
Are you in the US? From the US? Did you go to college? Do you work?
Do you have siblings? How old were your parents when they had you ?
I'm from Maine, US but it's been 15 years since living in FL.
I'm currently in my 3rd year in business administration. My parents were in their mid 20's when they had me. I only got one sibling, a 17 year-old brother. I was thinking of trying an online dating site and will have my profile ready by tomorrow.
If you waited this long, why not just wait til you are married or someone you see yourself marrying. Some men see a virgin as a challenge or bragging rights afterwards.
If anything, tell a dude, you are waiting until marriage and if they dont disappear, they might be the person you that cares about you and you would be willing to lose your virginity to, if if you arent waiting for marriage. Just dont let yourself be another notch on a dudes belt.
I understand your stance in trying to warn me about the creeps out there but I don't see marriage as a license to make love with your partner. Trust and connection would have already been established before someone gets engaged.
Quote:
Originally Posted by augiedogie
I would not keep it a secret. Virgins are now very popular with some men. They dont want to marry a girl that is already "well known" in town.
That's fine. Though I wouldn't want to end up with someone that's only extra nice to me just because of my virginity. If I were in a long-term relationship and being a virgin is the only reason he finds me marriage material, then I would assume he must not be interested in my overall qualities and me as a person.
youve gotten some good advice so i'll just pop in that the correct terminology in this case is chaste.
a women can have sexual intercourse 100 times and still be a virgin so long as she doesnt get pregnant (obviously saying a man is a virgin would be like saying a chair is a virgin).
prior to modern medicine and medical procedures, a women usually only had 1-shot to have a baby (think julius ceasers mother -- c-section) therefore her virgin womb became valuable to men who wished to raise a warrior who can take his place if he died in battle.
there were no prenatal vitamins, epidural , ob/gyn's, maturnity wards/n.i.c.u.'s ... in those times.
prior to modern medicine and medical procedures, a women usually only had 1-shot to have a baby (think julius ceasers mother -- c-section) therefore her virgin womb became valuable to men who wished to raise a warrior who can take his place if he died in battle.
In what vintage stag mag did you read this BS? Lolol
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