how soon is too soon to move in together? (date, girlfriend, guys)
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I don't think there's any time limit. It depends on what you have to lose. In general, I'm a firm believer in moving in together ASAP provided living together is your end goal.
Why? You waste less time. Moving in together will show you who a person really is and give you a solid idea of what being married to them would be like. If you have dealbreakers to discover, it's better to find them out before you waste years dating them.
I second this one.
I it is nonsense to keep paying for an empty apartment when you are at his place 24/7. The money you save - if you ever need to get out of his place to breathe - you can stay in a 5 star hotel for.
Also, yes, you will see really fast how a person really is and if you two get along - moving in will make it or break it. Why wait a year and then realize, it isn't working?
Just one thing - a lot of guys don't care when you move in and make it your home. But there are others who don't like when you move stuff around or add things to make it more homely for you. Women need to nest otherwise they don't feel home.
So you either find a new place together where you both have equal rights or make sure he is ok with it when you move in and move furniture and make it your place.
And please, please pay him rent - even if it is not much and he doesn't want it - it will give you and foremost him the feeling that you have a right to be there.
Better pay him $200 in rent than paying $400/month on groceries. In his mind he will not really recognize that you pay stuff here and there. All he sees is that you do not pay rent and live for free.
So...reading another thread helped to carry along a conversation my Bf & I have been having about moving in together. We are in kind of a unique situation because we were long distance at first...only visiting back & forth a few weekends a month. We now live in the same area, tho...it will be going on 3 months soon where we are together most days...I am always spending the night at his home.
We couldn't be happier...& we are thinking it is almost *silly* for me to keep paying for my apt. My question is...how soon would you consider it to be too early to move in together? I have always been very independent....& I am recently out of a very short marriage, so I *know* I don't want anything like that, but living together seems to make lots of sense. We love spending time together & due to our different schedules, it isn't always easy....it would be so much easier if I moved in with him & cut back my work hrs a little. How soon is too soon to move in with a guy?
I'm the opposite of most people and I think the SOONER the BETTER.
You are going to tell a lot about a person by living with them and you'll get a read on a lot of stuff that you wouldn't by dating and still living apart.
Interactions during down times for instance.
It's also better for the guy although guys don't see it that way.
It shouldn't be seen as a 'huge step forward'. It is partly that a big step, but it's also a screening process.
No...it's not to save money or "default"...it's because we are *happy* & we want to make it easier to spend even more time together rather than going back & forth which becomes a drag on time. It would be easier for me....& I could even cut back my hours to have more time with him. Money isn't a thing. I know about it barely being enough time, it has crossed my mind....but if we were to break up, what is the difference between moving out or taking my belongings out that I keep there now anyway?
If you are happy now, I wouldn't change a thing.
No absolute reason to live together unless you want to raise a family.
We were in a long distance relationship for about 8 months before the 3 months together in the same area, so it has been about 11 months total.
..Yes but being in a long distance relationship is very different then being together full-time and it's only been 3 months since you guys have been really together full-time.You should do it after 1 yr after being together full-time to actually see how the person really is on a full-time basis before moving in with the person.
I guarantee it that you will start to see the real him in 3 more months time which will only be 6 months for being together full-time.If you still like what you see after 6 months...then you can make a better decision.
Interesting, how this thread is so divided. I guess it always depends on the individuals.
Where I live you cannot find a safe place under $2k, and the bay area may even be worse ... so ...
And no lease? How did that happen that OP doesn’t have to worry about a lease and deposits?
OP- what if you move in with your bf and find things you hadn’t noticed before that aren’t “ok”? You changed your whole life and career for him, where do you go if you don’t want to live with him? Left in his town, with this job you got bc he lived there. Nothing awful would really happen if you kept your apt for awhile, it’s just a little inconvenient.
So...reading another thread helped to carry along a conversation my Bf & I have been having about moving in together. We are in kind of a unique situation because we were long distance at first...only visiting back & forth a few weekends a month. We now live in the same area, tho...it will be going on 3 months soon where we are together most days...I am always spending the night at his home.
We couldn't be happier...& we are thinking it is almost *silly* for me to keep paying for my apt. My question is...how soon would you consider it to be too early to move in together? I have always been very independent....& I am recently out of a very short marriage, so I *know* I don't want anything like that, but living together seems to make lots of sense. We love spending time together & due to our different schedules, it isn't always easy....it would be so much easier if I moved in with him & cut back my work hrs a little. How soon is too soon to move in with a guy?
There are no children involved? If not, then whenever the two of you agree it is what you want.
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