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What's her latest reaction to you not attending functions with 'demented Grandma?"
The things you talk about here and in that thread and your other one from last Sept/Oct seem to suggest she feels/ thinks she needs you devoted to her 100 per cent of the time regardless of what you want
Do you want to not only be obligated to massage her feet but kiss (her …) them from now until...….(she grows up)
What's her latest reaction to you not attending functions with 'demented Grandma?"
The things you talk about here and in that thread and your other one from last Sept/Oct seem to suggest she feels/ thinks she needs you devoted to her 100 per cent of the time.
You want to not only be obligated to massage her feet but kiss them from now until...….(she grows up)
We had another talk and she respects and sees where I am coming from. She also apologized for being so hellbent about trying to create a good relationship with me and grandma. She told me I no longer need to feel obligated to go to any functions she will be at. Matter of fact, she also told me that her mother and aunt were both talking about how it might be time to no longer include her at certain family gatherings.
I definitely think she has some outlandish fairy tale vision where she was meant to be waited on both hand and foot. I have no issue taking care of my SO, but I am not a personal servant. I also think this is why most of her exes left her. She never really wants to open up about her past relationships, and I suspect it's because she worries it'll reveal that she was the one with the issues that caused them to end.
Well, I guess what you need to know is what she thinks is the resolution.
If it's all what you have to do, then hang it up, buddy. It's over or should be unless 'slow death' is appealing to you
Last night, the girlfriend and I got into a fight, but turned it around and had a good discussion about some issues we are having. I told my girlfriend that she can be a bit of a control freak, can be selfish, and sometimes can say cruel things without thinking it through before she says it. She told me I am not as passionate as I was about 6 months ago....I don't want to lose her, but she said she is tired of rehashing this issue and said she is going to end it with me if we can't fix this.
Okay, so you have five days or whatever to become Passion's Plaything again....or else!
But what about the Princess? What is she doing not to be a control freak, not to be selfish and not to say cruel things?
Let me guess. Nothing. Because you are the only one with a problem.
Dump her, move on. There are millions of single women in the world.
Okay, so you have five days or whatever to become Passion's Plaything again....or else!
But what about the Princess? What is she doing not to be a control freak, not to be selfish and not to say cruel things?
Let me guess. Nothing. Because you are the only one with a problem.
Dump her, move on. There are millions of single women in the world.
She has said she will follow through, and that only lasts for a couple days. You and everyone else are most likely right. She is stuck in her ways and has no desire to change.
It's never going to be enough for her. A person shouldn't have to change and force themselves to be a different way than how they naturally are. If you don't tend to want to give massages or do whatever she's asking, and it's not something you enjoy enough to just do without being asked, then you're not the type to do those things and that's okay. Not saying she's wrong to ask for a massage in the moment if you're sitting on the couch together (and I'm guessing you'd have no problem with that right?). But I don't think it's really about that.
She doesn't feel right about the relationship, most likely because she's not happy with herself. Her reaction to you wanting "me time" says it all. Someone who can't stand to be alone or give their partner any freedom is attempting to use romantic relationships to fill a hole within themselves.
I call people like that "leaky buckets". They can't hold their own water supply. The bucket is constantly running dry, and instead of learning to patch themselves up and heal, they are constantly demanding others to fill their buckets back up.
It will never work. She will drain you til there's nothing left. If you make an effort to be "more passionate", she will find something else you're doing wrong.
it's never going to be enough for her. A person shouldn't have to change and force themselves to be a different way than how they naturally are. If you don't tend to want to give massages or do whatever she's asking, and it's not something you enjoy enough to just do without being asked, then you're not the type to do those things and that's okay. Not saying she's wrong to ask for a massage in the moment if you're sitting on the couch together (and i'm guessing you'd have no problem with that right?). But i don't think it's really about that.
She doesn't feel right about the relationship, most likely because she's not happy with herself. Her reaction to you wanting "me time" says it all. Someone who can't stand to be alone or give their partner any freedom is attempting to use romantic relationships to fill a hole within themselves.
I call people like that "leaky buckets". They can't hold their own water supply. The bucket is constantly running dry, and instead of learning to patch themselves up and heal, they are constantly demanding others to fill their buckets back up.
It will never work. She will drain you til there's nothing left. If you make an effort to be "more passionate", she will find something else you're doing wrong.
It's never going to be enough for her. A person shouldn't have to change and force themselves to be a different way than how they naturally are. If you don't tend to want to give massages or do whatever she's asking, and it's not something you enjoy enough to just do without being asked, then you're not the type to do those things and that's okay. Not saying she's wrong to ask for a massage in the moment if you're sitting on the couch together (and I'm guessing you'd have no problem with that right?). But I don't think it's really about that.
She doesn't feel right about the relationship, most likely because she's not happy with herself. Her reaction to you wanting "me time" says it all. Someone who can't stand to be alone or give their partner any freedom is attempting to use romantic relationships to fill a hole within themselves.
I call people like that "leaky buckets". They can't hold their own water supply. The bucket is constantly running dry, and instead of learning to patch themselves up and heal, they are constantly demanding others to fill their buckets back up.
It will never work. She will drain you til there's nothing left. If you make an effort to be "more passionate", she will find something else you're doing wrong.
Wow, great analogy! I never looked at it that way. For starters, I will give her a foot massage if we are lying on the couch together and her feet are up, or if she asks. I have no issue doing it, but after a half hour goes by and she complains I didn't go long enough, I'm just like, really? I know she is insecure and isn't happy with her weight because she constantly says she feels disgusting. I have told her numerous times she is a beautiful woman and that she doesn't have to change for me, but have also told her she is more than welcome to workout with me at the gym, and that we can exercise together. She has mentioned she wants to go with me so I try to get her to go, but she never does.
I have suspected at times that she is in a relationship to fill a void she is missing in her life, because I get this vibe from her that she feels she is missing something, or needs some self-healing. And like you said, I'm worried that once we have passion again, that she will shift her attention to something else to be upset about.
Wow, great analogy! I never looked at it that way. For starters, I will give her a foot massage if we are lying on the couch together and her feet are up, or if she asks. I have no issue doing it, but after a half hour goes by and she complains I didn't go long enough, I'm just like, really? I know she is insecure and isn't happy with her weight because she constantly says she feels disgusting. I have told her numerous times she is a beautiful woman and that she doesn't have to change for me, but have also told her she is more than welcome to workout with me at the gym, and that we can exercise together. She has mentioned she wants to go with me so I try to get her to go, but she never does.
I have suspected at times that she is in a relationship to fill a void she is missing in her life, because I get this vibe from her that she feels she is missing something, or needs some self-healing. And like you said, I'm worried that once we have passion again, that she will shift her attention to something else to be upset about.
I wish you could grasp the concept that you won’t “have passion again.”
She doesn’t mean passion anyway. She means constant fluffing if her ego, and that is NOT a boyfriend’s job.
She is a black hole of insecurity who will always expect you to prop her up and make her feel better about herself. It’s extremely unhealthy, and the more you write about her, the worse it sounds.
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