Guys, gf living with male roommate? (dating, wife, boyfriend, cheating)
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I've been looking at places to move in close to work/campus while I get my masters. There is one place in particular I am interested in (great place). Roommate is getting his grad degree at the same college and works 8-5, like I do. Thing is, the roommate is a guy and my boyfriend (dating for 3 years) isn't too happy about the fact that I am leaning towards the place with a male roommate.
I have tried to reassure him, I think the fact that we dont see each other much during he week due to our schedules and distance means I'd technically be spending my nights with just the roommate.
Guys how do you feel about this living arrangement? Has your gf/wife ever had a male roommate?
A roommate is just a roommate, a co-renter. If you've been with your bf for 3 years, he shouldn't have anything to worry about. You can call him evenings, and visit with him by phone. This sounds like an opportunity to find out if your bf is the jealous, controlling type. With both you and the roommate working full-time AND going to grad school, who would have time for any extracurricular activities, anyway? BF needs to get real, hopefully he'll mellow out after he's been around and sees the situation. I guess it's easy to feel insecure about a situation like that, but it's not like you're going to be socializing with the roommate, or constantly talking about him, or anything. You'll have your own life.
I can see why your BF would be upset. You will be living with another guy. You two could hit it off really well and something could happen. You may end up spending a lot of time together.
I had a male roommate. We hit it off the moment we met and we actually spent many hours together the first time we met. We let it get too far that night, if you know what I mean. I did end up renting from him and we had strict boundaries after that. I did like him a lot! We were great friends though.
I had three male roommates. But in my case I was living with them before meeting my BF.
I think that makes a big difference. I know I wouldn't be okay if my SO took in a female roommate, someone he didn't even know. Yes, your BF should trust you, but at the same time, living in close quarters with someone of the opposite sex has the potential to create issues in your relationship that don't need to be there.
It sounds like you bf doesn't really trust you. My wife lived with an ex-bf when I met her, and that continued for over a year until she and I got a place together. The thing is, I trusted her, and having met him, I could tell he was respectful of her relationship with me.
Of course, not everyone is trustworthy, so take each situation on its merits.
I would dump any boyfriend who objected to me living with a male roommate. Done deal.
I would too but not because I want to be a db. For me, it would represent a fundamental attitude difference. If I am in a committed relationship, I am in a committed relationship. I don't hide in a hidey hole because, as the other poster says, "anything can happen. No anything CAN'T "happen" unless I choose it to happen which I am not going to do because I am a person of character and integrity. People with integrity don't cheat.
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