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Just live your life the way you are comfortable, but don't give up on meeting people.
Keep looking for experiences you enjoy, and you'll be around other like-minded people there. You don't have to be a pick-up artist, but don't go inside a shell either.
Right, and lots of things in life are uncomfortable, but people can't and shouldn't isolate themselves--you go on job interviews, you have meetings, you fly on airplanes, you go to doctor's appointments, etc.
You absolutely don't have to be a pickup artist, but you absolutely can take advantage of activities and opportunities that your school provides to socialize with people of your own age and interests.
Right, and lots of things in life are uncomfortable, but people can't and shouldn't isolate themselves--you go on job interviews, you have meetings, you fly on airplanes, you go to doctor's appointments, etc.
You absolutely don't have to be a pickup artist, but you absolutely can take advantage of activities and opportunities that your school provides to socialize with people of your own age and interests.
I agree that you need to take advantage of the pre-set opportunities your school provides to be around people, OP, because once you graduate and begin working, YOU will be responsible for initiating those activities.
You will have to seek them out and then make yourself get out of the house and go. It's just a little bit easier to get to know your peers when you're already surrounded by them.
It also helps to stop thinking about these interactions as something you're forced to do. Getting to know people, and yes maybe dating, is supposed to be driven by an honest care for someone and a desire to get to know them.
Have you had meaningful friendships with people that you care about? It's not supposed to be a chore or a mission. You should be somewhat naturally propelled to find out stuff about people and let them know stuff about you.
You definitely have an uphill battle. If you don't like being around people other people can sense that vibe and they won't want to be around you either. Women like confidence. Confident men don't stutter and stammer over words. I would stay out of clubs. Bars and clubs are good for the alpha male type with lots of social proof. You clearly are not that type. So going to a place like that to try and women will actually leave more frustrated. I speak from experience on this. I'm not that type either and it took me years to figure this out. We have to meet women in everyday places like work, gyms, stores, or online dating sites, (dating sites can often be very frustrating),. Not to hijack the thread, but the shorter you are from 5'10 the harder dating can be. Our society discriminates on height. I've meet women that won't date below a certain, and many of these women were short themselves. I've been rejected for my height a couple of times. It's total bullsh*t, but that's how it is and you can't do anything about it.
My advice is to get counseling for your anxiety. Like another poster said that can be helped. I honestly believe if you got that anxiety under control it would help you tremendously.
In closing I will say this. Dating in the US for a man is not easy. Unless you are some rich f*ck that has lots of money. Work on the anxiety and accept the things you can't change. Good luck
I do have some meaningful friendships but these are all males. These people tend to be a few years older than me due to the commuter school factor. This doesn’t happen with the opposite sex though
It's been said dozens of times before. Stop thinking of every female as a potential date. You say there are a few in class that aren't available.. Great! Start with them and get used to just talking to women in general.
Then branch out but with the idea that "women" are just people, too
I do have some meaningful friendships but these are all males. These people tend to be a few years older than me due to the commuter school factor. This doesn’t happen with the opposite sex though
So you've never just been on friendly, chatty terms with a girl?
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