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Old 07-09-2019, 01:25 PM
 
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I was more concerned that he could "squeeze" in another date with about a month's time.

Talk about tepid.
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Old 07-09-2019, 01:33 PM
 
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Originally Posted by ClaraC View Post
I was more concerned that he could "squeeze" in another date with about a month's time.

Talk about tepid.
Yup, agreed!

Actually when he said that, in my mind i laughed thinking "buddy if I was super into you, one date a month would not work for me"
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Old 07-09-2019, 01:37 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bebe182 View Post
He was asking me a lot about myself, but he would cut me off at times when I went to answer, however at the end of the night he apologized saying he hoped he didn't dominate the conversation too much, that that's one of his faults and people always complain about it, so I was glad he was self aware at least lol.

I would go out with him again, because I did have a nice time and I'd give him another chance to see if maybe a spark can develop.
OK, great. Give us an update, then, re: the next date. Hopefully, it'll happen. And btw, the apology is another sign he likes you.
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Old 07-09-2019, 05:30 PM
 
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Originally Posted by bebe182 View Post
Yup, agreed!

Actually when he said that, in my mind i laughed thinking "buddy if I was super into you, one date a month would not work for me"
this reminds me of a date I had with a guy from online that also seemed pretty eager to go out, but then when we did, it was...well, as they often are, awkward. it annoys me that all these guys can't wait to go out, but then have no idea what to do if someone actually goes out with them. anyway, he didn't really seem that interested, but it was hard to tell if he was just nervous or whatever, but once we got to the place and sat down, it was like he hardly looked at me (not a good sign I thought, since they should at least like what you look like, lol), and checked his phone a couple times. It was like we both couldn't wait to get out of there, but then once we did he started talking about if I wanted to go out again...so then I was kinda annoyed bc he didn't even seem interested, yet seems to assume I'd want to go out again!? like bc apparently I was too ugly to look at, that I just must be desperate and want to go out with anyone that'll have me. so then I gave him a weird look, to which he did the same, then I said "would it be this awkward?" he said, "probably". well what's not to look forward to! then (since we were walking back to where we met), he asked if there was any place else around to go to get coffee or something, but I didn't think any place was open, plus I was kind of annoyed anyway, so he mentions going back to my place. (he was from out of town) I'm like "uh, no...". then I was even more annoyed that he didn't seem that interested, but then talks about a 2nd date, and then when it's about to end wants to go back to my place. so then at the end, he's just standing there like "uh what do I do now?" so finally I was just like "well nice meeting you" he was like "you too" (still standing there all baffled) then I was like "take care" and just started walking off really fast so he wouldn't get any other ideas. then he messaged me the next day, asking what I was trying to "get out of it" and that it seemed like I just wanted some you know what. I was like "uh, no, buddy, I think that was you." lol well I didn't say that, but I just said uh the point is to go out and see if you want to see each other again...like I really need to explain dating? lol. ugh.

so yeah, I wouldn't assume just bc a guy asks about a 2nd date that he's interested, it could just mean that he doesn't have any other options, sadly as is often the case with these guys online.
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Old 07-10-2019, 01:18 AM
 
1,593 posts, read 770,073 times
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Originally Posted by bebe182 View Post
He's definitely not the quiet type, he talked a lot! And the weird part is he was flirty over text before we met, that's why when we met in person and he wasn't flirty at all I figured he just wasn't feeling the spark.
Maybe more shy instead of quiet? I’m shy, but I can talk a lot if I feel like I can contribute to the conversation. On the date I went on last year I was interested in the woman and had been flirty through texts and DM’s (or had tried to be, anyways). At the date though she acted...friendly. Just friendly. Not cold in her manner of speaking and relating to me, but not interested, and certainly no indications that she wanted me to interact with her physically. She gave me a sidehug at the end of the date and that was it for contact. I was waiting for her to show me that something might be permissible, for her to put her hands or arm in such a way that I might be able to touch them to emphasize a point or something, but nope...she kept me as my username says the whole time.

She ended up ghosting me afterwards, so definitely not interested in Date 2, but maybe your guy is similar to my frame of thought during that date? Shy, inexperienced, worried about overstepping? Waiting to see what you do to show him that some sort of physical interaction is okay by you, and that you may be interested in him? And without him getting anything he could interpret, he assumes that you weren’t interested, hence his soft-pedaling a second date, almost like he expects a rejection? Except in his case it sounds like you really are interested in trying at least one more date, so maybe that would be enough to get him to open up some in any feelings towards you?
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Old 07-10-2019, 09:03 AM
 
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Originally Posted by At Arms Length View Post
Maybe more shy instead of quiet? I’m shy, but I can talk a lot if I feel like I can contribute to the conversation. On the date I went on last year I was interested in the woman and had been flirty through texts and DM’s (or had tried to be, anyways). At the date though she acted...friendly. Just friendly. Not cold in her manner of speaking and relating to me, but not interested, and certainly no indications that she wanted me to interact with her physically. She gave me a sidehug at the end of the date and that was it for contact. I was waiting for her to show me that something might be permissible, for her to put her hands or arm in such a way that I might be able to touch them to emphasize a point or something, but nope...she kept me as my username says the whole time.

She ended up ghosting me afterwards, so definitely not interested in Date 2, but maybe your guy is similar to my frame of thought during that date? Shy, inexperienced, worried about overstepping? Waiting to see what you do to show him that some sort of physical interaction is okay by you, and that you may be interested in him? And without him getting anything he could interpret, he assumes that you weren’t interested, hence his soft-pedaling a second date, almost like he expects a rejection? Except in his case it sounds like you really are interested in trying at least one more date, so maybe that would be enough to get him to open up some in any feelings towards you?
You still texted her after the first date though, I haven't heard from him.
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Old 07-10-2019, 09:37 AM
 
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Originally Posted by bebe182 View Post
You still texted her after the first date though, I haven't heard from him.
Have you tried texting him?
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Old 07-10-2019, 10:23 AM
 
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Originally Posted by At Arms Length View Post
Have you tried texting him?
No, I feel like if he's interested in seeing me again he'll text me
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Old 07-10-2019, 10:29 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
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Originally Posted by bebe182 View Post
No, I feel like if he's interested in seeing me again he'll text me
He's probably just doing that "wait three days to contact her so you don't seem too eager" thing.
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Old 07-10-2019, 11:25 AM
 
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It doesn't really matter as you are going to be meeting a European guy. ;-)

He probably meant when he said it, but you will just have to wait to see if the asks you for a second date. Or, you could ask him.
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