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I recall going to see a movie in which I happened to sit next to a girl who was around my age (college-aged at the time). The theater was pretty full and there weren't a lot of open seats, so she had to sit directly to my right (no buffer chair). She spent the entire movie leaned as far away from me as she could get and still look relatively normal. Made me feel even worse about myself. My therapist at the time told me to imagine reasons why she might be doing that, reasons that had nothing to do with my unattractiveness. I came up with several...temperature in the theater (and so curled up away from me for warmth) is the one I can think of off the top of my head. My therapist seemed satisfied by my effort at her exercise, but I never really believed any of the reasons I came up with for the exercise...the girl had sat next to me because the seat had been the only one open when she'd gotten there (that says something in and of itself) and she recoiled as far away from touching me as she could get because she didn't want to give a guy like me any wrong ideas by getting too close to me.
So, it can happen. Women know that socially awkward, perpetually single men tend to interpret friendliness as interest.
What the girl did is rude. You don't reject guys in your social circle the way you reject some drunk, wanna-be player. That's something that I don't understand. Maybe, the woman is shy around new people. I don't know.
The thread title can also be titled I was unable to watch the movie because my VCR did not work. Relying primarily on meeting woman through your friends is so 1980s. It's something that people did before the Internet became popular.
JBT1980, I don't why you're not playing the numbers game. Nearly all the average-looking guys that are having fun dating different women talk to large numbers of women. They learned that you have to go through a bunch of no's to get a single yes. Women have more options in dating than men. That woman that rejected you might have shot you down for reasons that you have no control over. She might be emotionally unavailable, dealing with a breakup, focused on her work, or maybe she only dates guys of a certain ethnicity. Last weekend at a nightclub, I saw this cute woman follow this short, small, scrawny guy. This guy is always smiling. He plays the numbers game spammer style.On the other hand, this tall guy that is struggling with women made the same mistake again in his social circle of only hitting on the hottest woman in this room.
I'm surprised that some of the people that responded to the OP's older threads didn't notice that he wasn't talking to that many people. I wonder if they thought that he should focus on varying his open-ended questions or something.
It was just rude. Do people only talk to people they’re attracted to? What about if we had chemistry and hit it off?
It’s just annoying how I purposely am passive because of how much rejection hurts me and my self esteem yet I get thrusted into these situations which remind me how unattractive iam.
This is why I don’t even try with woman.
I'm not sure you should be taking this so personally. There are lots of possible reasons here for her not talking to you. She could be rude, or shy, or just not wanting to make conversation for whatever reason. It doesn't have to be about you or about all women in general, this was about her.
I recall going to see a movie in which I happened to sit next to a girl who was around my age (college-aged at the time). The theater was pretty full and there weren't a lot of open seats, so she had to sit directly to my right (no buffer chair). She spent the entire movie leaned as far away from me as she could get and still look relatively normal. Made me feel even worse about myself. My therapist at the time told me to imagine reasons why she might be doing that, reasons that had nothing to do with my unattractiveness. I came up with several...temperature in the theater (and so curled up away from me for warmth) is the one I can think of off the top of my head. My therapist seemed satisfied by my effort at her exercise, but I never really believed any of the reasons I came up with for the exercise...the girl had sat next to me because the seat had been the only one open when she'd gotten there (that says something in and of itself) and she recoiled as far away from touching me as she could get because she didn't want to give a guy like me any wrong ideas by getting too close to me.
So, it can happen. Women know that socially awkward, perpetually single men tend to interpret friendliness as interest.
I once had a woman I went out on a DATE with sit a seat away from me.
What's funny is at the time I still thought I had a chance after the date. I thought there might be some 'weird' reason to justify her behavior, just as posters are coming up with weird justifications for ignoring a friend of a friend.
That was a looooong time ago. Today, I can laugh at that, but when I look back on it, man, that's just pretty rude to do to a person.
I would surmise that for whatever reason she didn't want to encourage you. Maybe she is interested in someone else, maybe she is gay, who knows.
I have had occasion when my behavior could have been interpreted as "rude" but it was in the hope of discouraging the person from asking me out and having to turn them down.
I would surmise that for whatever reason she didn't want to encourage you. Maybe she is interested in someone else, maybe she is gay, who knows.
I have had occasion when my behavior could have been interpreted as "rude" but it was in the hope of discouraging the person from asking me out and having to turn them down.
Of course that was the reason. Like I said she saw me and was not attracted to me most likely.
But I simply was striking up a convo to be friendly and see what happens. It didn’t have to lead to anything. I was sitting next to her for three hours I figured it would be weird or awkward to say nothing regardless of who it is since were at the same party.
If she ignores talking to any man she’s not attracted to in fear she gives off the wrong impression thats pretty weird.
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