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Old 08-05-2019, 08:20 PM
 
1,774 posts, read 1,191,620 times
Reputation: 3910

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I would cool it slightly and find out more information. Is this man from a foreign country where the girlfriend lives, and perhaps there will be some type of marriage arranged?

Learn your new job, and try to keep your mind on work. This guy is not your boss or immediate supervisor, is he?

Relationships where people have been dating a while and then meet someone new happen every day. A relative met someone new, and decided since she had not received a marriage proposal yet, the new guy was a better possible match. And yes, the new guy did propose marriage and they are still happily married 35+ years later. [The former BF begged and begged for her to marry him after he found out about the other guy but she said no - he waited too long and it hurt her].

See how things go. I would not deliberately go after someone else's promised man. Like I said, it is possible he could string you along, too, if he has done this with another woman.

But, if attraction seems mutual, and you do end up dating, make sure you do not let the relationship go long, if he asks for intimacy and strings you along like the other one. Find out exactly
what does he wants from you, and where the relationship is headed, and you need to make sure he has indeed broken things off with the old girlfriend.

Good luck!
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Old 08-05-2019, 08:52 PM
 
20,757 posts, read 8,579,752 times
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The awkward part is dating someone you work with. If it goes bad one of you will have to find a new job and everyone will gossip about you.


Are you sure he isn't gay?
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Old 08-05-2019, 09:31 PM
 
1,278 posts, read 1,115,483 times
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Don't get involved with people you work with. It's a really bad idea.
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Old 08-06-2019, 12:28 AM
 
2,095 posts, read 1,558,762 times
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no. don't be a homewrecker
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Old 08-06-2019, 07:01 AM
 
8,779 posts, read 9,452,560 times
Reputation: 9548
You’re basically asking if you should try to break someone up and justify it by using things you find questionable about his arrangement.

Lmfao...do whatever, it’s your life. Just don’t sugar coat it with all the flowery nonsense
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Old 08-07-2019, 01:41 PM
 
Location: Southern California
12,773 posts, read 14,983,025 times
Reputation: 15337
Quote:
Originally Posted by Confused321 View Post
He doesn't actually talk about her at all unless asked about her! When asked about marriage he jokingly said 'we've been together for 10 years, if i was going to propose i would have done it by now!". I could be completely misunderstanding their relationship - you're right. And i wouldnt act on anything unless he was 100% single. I just feel a crazy connection between us and like ive said this has never happened before.
No, don't do it. I don't care if his GF lives across the globe, you don't want to get involved w/ this messy, smug a-hole who wants his cake & eat it too. People often "seem good" BEFORE someone actually gets involved w/ them themselves, then it's a whole other story. He doesn't even seem good by his words that he says...making a mockery & disrespect out of committed relationships! Anyone who falls for him would be stupid & crazy.

I don't like how he's treating his GF. In 10 yrs, if he loved her so much, he would have found a way to marry her way by now. Neither of them seem to be complaining & even if his GF is, it's NONE of your business to find out. Now I don't know what her issue is & it doesn't matter, but face the facts. If he's treating his GF like this...stringing her along & still not marrying her after 10 yrs, then HOW do you think he'll treat YOU? If you get involved w/ him, he'll never marry you either.

Let's say you actually go on a date w/ him & you end up sleeping together. OK, then what?! Like he's going to finally break up w/ his GF of 10 yrs for you. Not happening. MARRIED men who've been married for 20+ yrs who have affairs don't divorce their wives. They just want to have their extramarital affairs & get their carnal urges handled & return back to their home where they're comfortable & the wifey continues to do the housework & have dinner on the table, being none the wiser. So he won't break up w/ her just because you go out w/ him OR even sleep w/ him...NOT w/ his immoral character that's its obvious that he has...not if they've been dating for 10 yrs & what are you left w/? Hurt resentment because he didn't break up w/ her & now you'll still have to still see this loser at work everyday in which he'll probably mock YOU that you want him. WHo the F is he?! Yeah, real nice!

Have some will power & restraint & don't be up in his face all the time unnecessarily at work. Don't pretend to bump into him in the lunchroom, etc. Get your mind off of him. It's not good to get involved w/ someone at work anyway.

DON'T DO IT. I repeat DON'T DO IT.
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