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Try fostering a child. You'd be 'doing good' while you 'test drive' what parenting is like. Your fantasy of what being a father is may not line up with the reality of parenthood, and fostering isn't permanent like adoption.
Teaching him/her loads of stuff, proving guidance in all the aspects where my father failed, thinking about what name would I choose, ec.
Sounds like you're particularly interested in raising a child but not necessarily parenting as a whole.
The bottom line is that you do have a biological clock too. It's pretty normal, and it varies per person. You could try the options some have presented here, although it's not the same as parenting your own child.
Men do get a version of baby fever, and it is contagious. Is anyone in your daily life (coworkers, family) having kids?
How do women do it, like Madonna or these rich movie stars? They pay big bucks for sperm from MIT or Stanford (it's basically eugenics).
A guy like the original poster could find eggs from super models (also very expensive). There's got to be a clinical service for this....
The other thing is, there are utilitarian benefits of two parents. What's the kids supposed to do while you're at work if there's no mom? Day Care? Your parents?
The other thing is, there are utilitarian benefits of two parents. What's the kids supposed to do while you're at work if there's no mom? Day Care? Your parents?
I would never deprive a child of having a mother. I'm perfectly aware none of this is feasible.
I think a lot of men have a vague "DNA" urge, like it makes them immortal. I have heard this from lots of men, and once they've sired one kid, they seem to lose the urge. They also don't seem to like a lot of what goes into being a parent, especially of babies and young children.
I think OP wants to fix his troubled childhood by raising a child, doing whatever his father didn't. While that is certainly a positive thing, I think there's an element of re-fathering oneself, and that doesn't take into account the unique personality of the child he wants to raise. It's not all teaching them how to play guitar or throw a football (and what if the child is a girl, would that still suit the re-fathering?)
I think OP could do well with some talk therapy and then decide about being a father. Thirty-four is hardly end of the line for a healthy man. Best wishes to OP in doing a wise thing.
How about becoming a scout leader? regular meetings with kids, teaching them things, helping them deal with problems
Big Brothers is also a good outlet.
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