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Old 08-16-2019, 04:24 PM
 
66 posts, read 17,406 times
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If I was in a relationship, I wouldnt know when to pay or what for pay for..
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Old 08-16-2019, 04:38 PM
 
14,330 posts, read 10,620,442 times
Reputation: 17797
Mod cut.

Quote:
But I do believe in gold diggers. Just that real ones are fairly rare.

I think what we are experiencing in this thread is the far more pervasive "something for nothing" "the atm mistake is my lucky day" "huge corporations can handle the loss of this stolen money" crowd. This encompasses both genders fairly equally.

They are kind of 2 branches of the same tree.
Perhaps.

Last edited by PJSaturn; 08-17-2019 at 08:18 AM.. Reason: Off-topic.
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Old 08-16-2019, 04:41 PM
 
14,330 posts, read 10,620,442 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mindfulness View Post
If I was in a relationship, I wouldnt know when to pay or what for pay for..
I whip out my wallet every time. Discussion follows. One of us pays.
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Old 08-16-2019, 04:50 PM
 
1,743 posts, read 3,684,216 times
Reputation: 1397
Quote:
Originally Posted by Airekaaah View Post
My boyfriend insists on paying for almost everything. I feel really bad because I don’t expect him to be the one paying all the time. The last three weekend trips we had, I booked the room and paid since I should at least pay for some of the expenses. And yet he still asks me how much I paid so he can pay for it. I told him it’s fine and that I am okay spending since it’s only fair. Question is do guys like spending money on their girlfriends? Do you think that a guy should always pay in a relationship? Thoughts?

P.S. I had my car broken into recently and my windows were busted. Boyfriend took care of everything and paid for the repairs. He was the one insisted even though he didn’t have to.
OP your post reads as if you have a problem with this. Are you kidding me?
You guy wants to pay... let him.
The fact that you're offering and actually paying whenever you can get a chance is probably a plus for him, it lets him know you're not just taking advantage of him.

Here's the thing people, spare everyone your faux sense of pride or equality that you need to appease. When you deny someone their obvious pleasure you're just being selfish.
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Old 08-16-2019, 04:53 PM
 
237 posts, read 64,103 times
Reputation: 476
One gets the meal, the other gets tip (Or whatever the event is, movie, etc.).Next time switch it up. Everyone's happy
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Old 08-16-2019, 05:19 PM
 
Location: Virginia
4,531 posts, read 2,347,249 times
Reputation: 13059
Quote:
Originally Posted by PriscillaVanilla View Post
Actually, men with masculine energy are more likely to want to pay and women with feminine energy are more likely to allow the man to pay. There is nothing disgusting about a woman accepting a man's money or vice versa.

Men with more feminine energy would probably do well in a relationship where the woman is primary breadwinner.

There have been plenty of books written about this topic, you might want to read some of them before just dismissing these concepts as disgusting.
Holy cow, I thought we'd moved beyond these theories (if you can call them that) of "masculine" and "feminine" energy after the 1960s.
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Old 08-16-2019, 06:58 PM
 
9,348 posts, read 5,459,557 times
Reputation: 10699
Quote:
Originally Posted by recuerdeme View Post
OP your post reads as if you have a problem with this. Are you kidding me?
You guy wants to pay... let him.
The fact that you're offering and actually paying whenever you can get a chance is probably a plus for him, it lets him know you're not just taking advantage of him.

Here's the thing people, spare everyone your faux sense of pride or equality that you need to appease. When you deny someone their obvious pleasure you're just being selfish.
And yet, you're OK with him doing this very thing to her.
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Old 08-16-2019, 07:56 PM
 
Location: In the Pearl of the Purchase, Ky
7,870 posts, read 13,324,953 times
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Aireekaaah, I went through that with my wife when we were dating and a little while after we got married. but the role was reversed. She was the one who paid for just about everything. We met a few months after my divorce and still trying to get everything settled. She would buy me just about anything I said I liked or even just looked at for very long. I told her I felt bad with her doing that. She said she didn't mind doing it because I always thank her and tell her she didn't have to. That way she knew she wasn't being taken for granted. I wasn't saying I liked something just because I knew she would buy it (like our granddaughter does to her boyfriend). She didn't pay for everything but a good bit. We lived 70 miles apart the first 6 years we were married and did a lot of traveling back and forth to spend the weekend with each other. We were going to alternate every other weekend, but she would tell me she'd rather come to my place. Told me later on that was because she knew I needed to use my gas to get back and forth to work instead of driving to her place.

Your boyfriend sounds like my wife. There "aint no way" you can stop him if he really wants to do it. Just keep letting him know it's appreciated.
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Old 08-16-2019, 08:08 PM
 
Location: Arlington, VA/Washington, DC
24,330 posts, read 34,369,751 times
Reputation: 33635
Quote:
Originally Posted by recuerdeme View Post
OP your post reads as if you have a problem with this. Are you kidding me?
You guy wants to pay... let him.
The fact that you're offering and actually paying whenever you can get a chance is probably a plus for him, it lets him know you're not just taking advantage of him.

Here's the thing people, spare everyone your faux sense of pride or equality that you need to appease. When you deny someone their obvious pleasure you're just being selfish.
Not when that pleasure is being done at the expense of your partners feelings.
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Old 08-16-2019, 08:12 PM
 
Location: Southeast Michigan
1,265 posts, read 1,047,381 times
Reputation: 1526
There's nothing really wrong with it... unless it is making you uncomfortable. It IS making you uncomfortable, so it's time to have a good, productive talk about it. If you aren't able to do that for any reason, there might be a problem within the relationship. In a healthy relationship you can talk things through and resolve the issue so that both of you are comfortable.
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