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What's wrong with having the difficult conversation with her? Be direct and ask her why she didn't show for the previous dinner date. There could be any number of reasons; she forgot, she misunderstood, she went to the wrong location and thought you stood her up... Be direct and be clear about how her actions affected you. She will never be motivated to change otherwise.
I called and texted her when she didn’t show up the second time. Her response was “I’m at a friends house. Not coming.” And that was all she texted.
About a month ago, a new girl started at my workplace. We got to chatting and eventually decided to go on a date; lunch. About 10 minutes before our date, she texts and says she's not feeling well. Ok, no big deal. We're chatting at work and we set a second date; dinner. She doesn't bother to show up or text or call.
At that point I decided to no longer attempt any sort of relationship. It's a no brainer. So we stop chatting at work and I just go about my business. She starts texting me telling me she wants to hang out, stops by desk and wants to chat. But she never mentions standing me up. She never apologized. It's like it never happened. Today at work, she said she wants to go to dinner with me. I said no, I have other plans. But really, I just don't trust her.
I am being paranoid? Is this normal behavior? I don't even know because I haven't been in the dating scene for awhile. If this is normal, then I'm in trouble.
If you don't hold on to your nuts now, when would you? You are doing exactly the right thing except I would tell her something like "Are you out of your mind? Why would I sign up to get stood up again?"
See, I know that you're 100% correct, that doesn't mean that I'm capable of fending off temptations. And, I think it's fair to say that, a person who you find very attractive and with whom you enjoy conversing, presents a sizable temptation.
I suppose, I'll ask this. If you were in my position, would you give it one more shot, just to find out if there's any potential?
If you do not find yourself capable of fending off temptations of this sort, my advice would find a way to become capable of it for this and all other future weird situations.
Potential for what? For her to get a big ego boost off of you and your "temptations" while you accept that she has already told you she is a total flake? Like a puppy too dopey not to stand there and get kicked again?
You are violating two common rules if you start dating her. Dating people at work, and dating unstable people. This is a two for one situation. No way Jose.
I called and texted her when she didn’t show up the second time. Her response was “I’m at a friends house. Not coming.” And that was all she texted.
Yeah, as others have said "WOW"
And you are still thinking of seeing this woman? I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt, but this response is just plain selfish. Looks more to me that she is enjoying stringing you along. Not even an "Not coming, sorry." If what you said about your attitude with sex is true, then you need to walk and find someone who knows how to treat others.
Completely agree! Doesn't matter how "playful" she is. Not even an attempt at an apology for forgetting. She could use a life lesson about respect. You may be perfectly positioned to teach it to her.
It doesn't matter how much you "desire her" if she doesn't show up.
She told you she's a MESS. NOT RELIABLE in the slightest.
Forget about this one, for your own good.
OP, listen to BirdieBelle. She's always spot on.
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