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Old 09-08-2019, 07:03 PM
 
3,218 posts, read 2,796,681 times
Reputation: 3459

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Harry Hemi View Post
Last time I was in PMs with someone that said that same thing for months, showed me guys that were 8-10 but she called them average. Those guys youre on dates with might see from a mile away that youre not really interested in them, and maybe thats why they bailed.

At any rate, I think you need to go on at least 20 dates to see if youre getting the same results with guys that youre actually interested in.
fair enough
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Old 09-08-2019, 07:23 PM
 
Location: North Carolina
137 posts, read 65,644 times
Reputation: 216
Quote:
Originally Posted by bebe182 View Post
...As for the date you’re mentioning I reached out to him once I got home to thank him and say I had a good time, I’m not the kind of girl who’s going to initiate a second date but I am the kind of girl who will try to make a man feel it’s ok to ask me out...
You’re the kind of girl with no follow up dates. You ask “why, what am I doing wrong?” This is a pattern with you. From a previous post, a date from late July:

Quote:
Originally Posted by bebe182
I'm supposed to meet a guy tonight off a dating app. Basically we last spoke on the phone Sunday afternoon, i told him that night I was going to the movies and he asked me to let him know how the movie was and said we would touch base on Thursday (I think or midweek). I never contacted him after the movie, not thinking much of it, but now it's 2:30pm and I haven't heard from him. Do I reach out to him and ask if we're still meeting? Or just let it go?
Quote:
Originally Posted by bebe182
Just texted asking he responded saying he's so sorry he forgot, and that he has a game at 9 but he can meet me after. I don't plan on meeting anyone after 11pm, so I'm going to pass. Besides he why would he makes plans for a Thursday if he has a game? Anyway glad I reached out, now I know he's flake.
You call this guy a flake after you ghost him until nearly 3 PM the day of the date. Learned helplessness.

Another example, someone asks “Have you tried texting him?”

Quote:
Originally Posted by bebe182
No, I feel like if he's interested in seeing me again he'll text me.
Someone else replies “He probably meant when he said it, but you will just have to wait to see if the asks you for a second date. Or, you could ask him.”

Be less passive, show more interest. I guarantee your dating game improve! It’s not “low character” or whatever to be proactive.
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Old 09-08-2019, 07:25 PM
 
Location: North Carolina
137 posts, read 65,644 times
Reputation: 216
Quote:
Originally Posted by bebe182 View Post
Perhaps, I’ve been told that before by someone I actually went on a date with years ago.

However—and idk maybe I’m wrong—I think those thank you texts saying I had a good time should be taken as a hint that I may be interested.
Yes you are wrong. Be explicit. “I’d like to go out again sometime.”
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Old 09-08-2019, 07:45 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
49,932 posts, read 59,754,614 times
Reputation: 98359
Quote:
Originally Posted by bebe182 View Post
However—and idk maybe I’m wrong—I think those thank you texts saying I had a good time should be taken as a hint that I may be interested.
A thank-you text can't make up for an evening sitting across from someone who believes this though:

Quote:
Originally Posted by bebe182 View Post

I’d say the men have been average at best (in the looks and career departments with the exception of one)...
That kind of thing really does come across subconsciously, like you're doing them a favor. People can pick up on that vibe.
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Old 09-08-2019, 07:55 PM
 
Location: (six-cent-dix-sept)
6,639 posts, read 4,546,425 times
Reputation: 4730
Quote:
Originally Posted by bebe182 View Post
I’ve had about 4 dating app dates this past month and none have resulted in a second date or at least a follow up text initiated by the guy. Some the dates I posted about, 2 out the 4 dates I would’ve been willing to go on a second date with the guy. I just don’t get what I’m doing wrong here?
i read your other thread. you seem to be too scared to risk rejection of asking for another date. my only advice would be to make more of an attempt to get what you want. you will increase your chances (although not guarantee) of getting it.

2 persons that are luke warm about each other and make no effort are just gonna' fade.
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Old 09-08-2019, 08:22 PM
 
2,258 posts, read 1,131,131 times
Reputation: 2836
Quote:
Originally Posted by AdamAnythe View Post
Yes you are wrong. Be explicit. “I’d like to go out again sometime.”
Yeah Bebe, you cant "Hint" about going out again you have to actually say it.
What you think is implying that youre interested, can come across to these guys as youre trying to avoid saying "Go out again" because you might not be interested enough.

Say what you mean, dont hint. Risk the rejection. If a guy rejects you after you said straight up that you want to go out again. Guys know how women act interested when theyre not to keep a guy from retaliating. Alot of women wont say theyre not interested until they are safe at home. SO you have to say it straight up, youll have more definitive results. Maybe narrow down the reasons theyre flaking.
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Old 09-08-2019, 08:37 PM
 
587 posts, read 421,083 times
Reputation: 838
Wish OP will post a pic of herself along pics of her 4 dates
Then we will know what the clearer picture of this situation is
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Old 09-08-2019, 08:41 PM
 
3,218 posts, read 2,796,681 times
Reputation: 3459
Quote:
Originally Posted by krosser100 View Post
Wish OP will post a pic of herself along pics of her 4 dates
Then we will know what the clearer picture of this situation is
Not sure that’s allowed??
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Old 09-08-2019, 08:46 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
49,932 posts, read 59,754,614 times
Reputation: 98359
Quote:
Originally Posted by bebe182 View Post
Not sure that’s allowed??
You can't post pix of others without their permission. You can post your pic, of course.
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Old 09-08-2019, 08:51 PM
 
Location: North Carolina
137 posts, read 65,644 times
Reputation: 216
Quote:
Originally Posted by bebe182 View Post
Not sure that’s allowed??
I would not post your pic. This is not a private forum, anyone can browse it. And a shady person could easily take your picture and figure out your real identity.

It’s up to you but I’d advise against it.
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