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Everybody claims it was their ex that was the problem.
Now, are we just supposed to believe that at face value when we're told that?
By default I assume both parties are at fault.
A guy I once knew used to claim that his landlord was an "a$$hole" !!!
It seems that some people tend to get nasty when the rent ain't been paid...
My Ex-wife accused me of being controlling cause I disagreed with her
having a boyfriend and staying out till dawn.
I wouldn't get involved with someone who has been divorced 3 times. I have to wonder why said person has been divorced 3 times. Is it really just dumb luck? Or is it poor judgment in picking a good spouse? Or was said person such a horrible spouse that someone else initiated the divorce over and over?
I wouldn't get involved with someone who has been divorced 3 times. I have to wonder why said person has been divorced 3 times. Is it really just dumb luck? Or is it poor judgment in picking a good spouse? Or was said person such a horrible spouse that someone else initiated the divorce over and over?
If you heard them out their reasons and they sounded legit, would you consider it? Maybe date then, just dont marry thrm?
I know a local woman, a school teacher, divorced 3 times. First 2 were short lived, both cases of abuse snd infedilty. Last one was 18 yrs, but he was simply tired of being married. So apparently, it was alk them, not her.
Depends on your age.
I'm 66. A lot of men have been divorced a couple of times by our age. Certainly if the average marriage is in one's 20s and often has kids involved, it can be a not-great marriage that goes on for some time. A second marriage can easily follow the first as a reaction or something. A third divorce, especially later in life, I wonder what the person is doing.
If I had been more conventional, I certainly would have been divorced twice by age 30 with no kids. I just didn't believe in marriage. I believe in lifelong commitment and certainly if legal marriage will help people to stay together well, then I'm for it, but just don't overly believe in the state being involved in that part of life.
When I was 26, I was very drawn to a man in my school class (RNs). He got married at age 30 for the third time to a woman who was also marrying for the third time at 33. They both drank a lot. I saw them as having married for love once and other times for a desperate attempt to stabilize and normalize their lives. (As far as I know, these third marriages didn't go well at all).
Stastically, marriage failure rate goes up for each time a person marries.
I think that sometimes people can't live by statistics. I mean, I know people who are perfectly comfortable driving around in cars but scared to fly on a plane. Statistically, you are vastly more likely to experience, or die in, a car wreck. But people don't structure their life choices around such things.
My lack of interest in someone with a bunch of divorces wouldn't have much to do with whether it would "last." I don't consider a relationship a failure if it doesn't go on 'til somebody dies. And the endings of most of my connections have not been fraught with drama like major life disasters. Many evolved into friendship, as there came a point we just realized that was a better fit for what we were to one another.
No, my problem would be with the worry about the person being in some way the common denominator, in particular if there is hostility with the exes. Or that they aren't very good at finding partners who actually satisfy them or meet their needs, or that they aren't very interested in meeting the needs of partners...something. I'd want to dig deeper and know why, if I liked someone a lot--but for this one thing.
That’s a control issue. I am perfectly fine driving in cars. I am a wreck on a plane. I am sure if I was flying the plane, I would be fine.
Friends, sure, friends and maybe a little more, sure, but to actually "date" and marry....no.
Regardless of how unlucky you may have been in your previous 3 (or more) marriages, if you've been divorced three or more times, you definitely are part of the problem in one way or another.
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