Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
You must have been a superstar because that doesn't happen. On average its been at least a week, maybe two, even if they're extremely interested. Companies move extremely slow (in my business) when hiring.
Thats what happened with my last job. I had an interview, had chemistry with the boss (female) but my answers weren't great overall and I got caught in a lie.
I left and got the call on my way home.
I am still surprised that happened - I usually get rejected 99% of the time - I am horrible in interviews in general.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,718,665 times
Reputation: 41376
Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew
I can totally see not wanting to get serious with someone whose life goals are that radically different. But I wonder if you know what chemistry is if you say you can't have chemistry with someone who wants kids.
Kids or wanting to have kids is just a boner killer for me. What if there is an oops with birth control in that case? Sorry, not sorry.
Thats what happened with my last job. I had an interview, had chemistry with the boss (female) but my answers weren't great overall and I got caught in a lie.
I left and got the call on my way home.
I am still surprised that happened - I usually get rejected 99% of the time - I am horrible in interviews in general.
The great recession taught me how to be better in interviews. I must have had a hundred between interviews and networking meetings. Exhausting. Now I'm really confident in interviews, which is much easier when you come from a place of power (have a job) vs desperation. Yours is a good story. Its all about chemistry and culture fit, less about what you know.
Kids or wanting to have kids is just a boner killer for me. What if there is an oops with birth control in that case? Sorry, not sorry.
That's why men who definitely don't want children should do as my one former boyfriend of mine did and get a vasectomy--complete with the post-procedure follow up checks. I'd say the same of women who don't wish to become mothers, but even in the twenty-first century, it's still easier to find a physician to perform a sterilization procedure on a childless man than on a childless woman, but I digress...
In my younger years, one of my non-negotiable deal breakers was that I refused to become seriously involved with a man who did not wish to become a parent. Casual dating was fine, but there was little use in becoming overly attached to someone who had such a fundamentally different life plan. There's just no changing someone's mind about what is truly an irrevocable choice once it's been made. As tempting as it might be at times, one cannot simply send a child "back to the factory," as my mother used to say.
Now that I'm older, it matters little to me if a man either is a parent or doesn't wish to become one as I've let that particular ship o' dreams sail on without me (motherhood) and I enjoy children in general.
Kids or wanting to have kids is just a boner killer for me. What if there is an oops with birth control in that case? Sorry, not sorry.
Forget the oops. These days, the "oops" can easily be by design! That's one of the reasons I lost all interest in sex. I have to vet a woman long and hard (no pun intended, I swear ) before I'll sleep with her, to be super-sure she doesn't want kids or is infertile. And even at that point, it'll be mostly for her sake. If she's as apathetic about sex as I am, all the better.
Forget the oops. Sometimes the "oops" is by design! That's one of the reasons I lost interest in sex.
You can't get a vas?
ETA: The history of male contraception development is disheartening. I sure would love to see more BC choices under men's control.
ETA for reals" That came off judgy. Not intended! There are many good reasons not to go the vas route.
You can't get a vas?
ETA: The history of male contraception development is disheartening. I sure would love to see more BC choices under men's control.
ETA for reals" That came off judgy. Not intended! There are many good reasons not to go the vas route.
I researched vasectomies. First, I have a mental block about cutting tools touching my most prized possession. Second, I read that chronic pain is not an uncommon side effect. I mean, you are cutting a body part that isn't meant to be cut. I don't know how severe the chronic pain could be, but I'd rather not find out the hard way.
In 2017, I read about Vasalgel. It's a gel that's injected into the vas deferens; it quickly solidifies and blocks the passage of sperm. The procedure is less invasive than a vasectomy, and lasts 10 years. It's also reversible, by injection with a dissolving agent. Vasalgel is already widely available in India. It was supposed to become available in the US in 2018, but its release stalled out. Presumably due to the FDA, but I wouldn't be surprised if the feminist lobby played a part too.
I researched vasectomies. First, I have a mental block about cutting tools touching my most prized possession. Second, I read that chronic pain is not an uncommon side effect. I mean, you are cutting a body part that isn't meant to be cut. I don't know how severe the chronic pain could be, but I'd rather not find out the hard way.
In 2017, I read about Vasalgel. It's a gel that's injected into the vas deferens; it quickly solidifies and blocks the passage of sperm. The procedure is less invasive than a vasectomy, and lasts 10 years. It's also reversible, by injection with a dissolving agent. Vasalgel is already widely available in India. It was supposed to become available in the US in 2018, but its release stalled out. Presumably due to the FDA, but I wouldn't be surprised if the feminist lobby played a part too.
Trust me: if there were a "feminist lobby," we'd be lobbying *for* a reliable,non-surgical, non-hormonal method of male birth control, not *against* such a thing.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
That's one of the reasons I lost all interest in sex. I have to vet a woman long and hard (no pun intended, I swear 
) before I'll sleep with her, to be super-sure she doesn't want kids or is infertile. And even at that point, it'll be mostly for her sake. If she's as apathetic about sex as I am, all the better.
