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In fact, I've known some people to use innuendo talk when upon first meeting. Be it a bar or some social event...before even getting the digits. Some would consider that creepy, some may consider it part of the dating ritual...ie...building sexual tension. I don't even do that, but some men are ballsy enough to get gross in an initial email to a woman to right away talk dirty, or share dic pics.
I'm gentleman enough to wait long enough when I'm locked into a relationship with someone to do so. That said, how is that creepy?
Quote:
Originally Posted by oh-eve
Those are not the kind who wait for a month!!
CREEPY. If someone is holding back on sex because they are NOT READY, they are even LESS ready for dirty talk and pushing it on them is creepy.
I actually see what you are both saying. This has to do with a failure in sexual escalation. If a guy escalates too quickly either verbally and physically, a woman is creeped out.
In my case, I escalated physically. In fact, said woman and myself kissed on the first date (first meet), and had a make-out session on the 2nd.
When we were seeing each other multiple times a week, eventually I'd start throwing innuendo her direction...which was mostly met with silence.
In comparison to other women I've dated, they weren't inconsistent like this one. I recall one of the women I dated to make the first quip after we did some making out. Won't get into the details, but it was pretty graphic...something about covering up some evidence of our fooling around when we were going out in public. I joked with her and said, "Woah, slow your roll..! LOL"
That's the kind of woman I want.
Had I been a dude saying what she said, the women here would probably think, "CREEP!"
In my case, I escalated physically. In fact, said woman and myself kissed on the first date (first meet), and had a make-out session on the 2nd.
When we were seeing each other multiple times a week, eventually I'd start throwing innuendo her direction...which was mostly met with silence.
In comparison to other women I've dated, they weren't inconsistent like this one. I recall one of the women I dated to make the first quip after we did some making out. Won't get into the details, but it was pretty graphic...something about covering up some evidence of our fooling around when we were going out in public. I joked with her and said, "Woah, slow your roll..! LOL"
That's the kind of woman I want.
Had I been a dude saying what she said, the women here would probably think, "CREEP!"
When there is a mismatch between verbal and physical escalation, usually there is a reason for it even if you aren't actually seeing it.
What I have found useful is to just check in with her emotionally. When I sing the praises of your monster boobs, I notice you seem less than enthusiastic about that, how come? If she is making out with you and continuing to see you, she likes you. But when she is going all silent on you, that is something to get curious about to find out why. It may not have anything to do with you, but some other stuff a past boyfriend said that makes her feel uncomfortable and she for whatever reason didn't bring it up in the moment because maybe she wants the make out session but doesn't want to ruin that moment.
But the silence especially repeated silences usually mean something.
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Innuendo is fine, it happens not infrequently, but my policy is to not go there first. Let the lady drop the first double entendre, etc then riff off of that some. Much smoother time.
CREEPY. If someone is holding back on sex because they are NOT READY, they are even LESS ready for dirty talk and pushing it on them is creepy.
Thisssssssssssssss.
Quote:
Originally Posted by timberline742
Innuendo is fine, it happens not infrequently, but my policy is to not go there first. Let the lady drop the first double entendre, etc then riff off of that some. Much smoother time.
When there is a mismatch between verbal and physical escalation, usually there is a reason for it even if you aren't actually seeing it.
What I have found useful is to just check in with her emotionally. When I sing the praises of your monster boobs, I notice you seem less than enthusiastic about that, how come? If she is making out with you and continuing to see you, she likes you. But when she is going all silent on you, that is something to get curious about to find out why. It may not have anything to do with you, but some other stuff a past boyfriend said that makes her feel uncomfortable and she for whatever reason didn't bring it up in the moment because maybe she wants the make out session but doesn't want to ruin that moment.
But the silence especially repeated silences usually mean something.
Innuendo is fine, it happens not infrequently, but my policy is to not go there first. Let the lady drop the first double entendre, etc then riff off of that some. Much smoother time.
ThisTown123, I don't often agree with timberline742 but I think you'd be wise to adopt his policy of not going there first.
Innuendo is fine, it happens not infrequently, but my policy is to not go there first. Let the lady drop the first double entendre, etc then riff off of that some. Much smoother time.
Agree with this one! Men should tread lightly on this one.
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