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Old 12-16-2019, 01:44 PM
 
92 posts, read 40,580 times
Reputation: 85

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Just curious on others experiences. Over the last 4 years I've had 4 women break up with me only to contact me a few months later.

All 4 gave me the generic "I'm not sure if I want a relationship right now" excuse or something along those lines when breaking up with me. One did have ex drama.

Probably the most interesting one was the first one who contacted me after 5 months of no contact to apologize to me. I told her there was nothing to be sorry for and I hope she was going good. An hour later she texts me inviting me to meet her at a bar. I do and she ends up coming home with me and we have sex that night and then again in the morning. She left and I never hear from her again. Definitely did not see that one coming.

How about you?
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Old 12-16-2019, 01:47 PM
 
15,013 posts, read 21,564,498 times
Reputation: 12334
I'm a woman and I've had it happen to me 3 times where a man broke up with me and then came back later. In all 3 times, I had moved on to someone else and said no thanks (usually because he took too long to come back). The most notable one was a guy who came back 3 whole years later asking to reunite after not having spoken a word in all that time.
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Old 12-16-2019, 02:09 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
49,932 posts, read 59,579,270 times
Reputation: 98359
Are you holding out hope, OP? I hope not.
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Old 12-16-2019, 02:59 PM
 
92 posts, read 40,580 times
Reputation: 85
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
Are you holding out hope, OP? I hope not.
I'm not going to lie to you BirdieBelle, a tiny bit but I'm not obsessing over it by no means. I'm in a lot better mindset than I was a few weeks ago. I'm still working on my house and doing everything I need to be doing. Plan to start dating again the first of the year. Still need some time.

I was just thinking back on all my relationships over the past 4 years and just realized that every one got back in contact with me after they broke it off. Was just curious on others experiences.
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Old 12-16-2019, 03:11 PM
 
10,494 posts, read 6,932,320 times
Reputation: 32304
Quote:
Originally Posted by brz85 View Post
Just curious on others experiences. Over the last 4 years I've had 4 women break up with me only to contact me a few months later.

All 4 gave me the generic "I'm not sure if I want a relationship right now" excuse or something along those lines when breaking up with me. One did have ex drama.

Probably the most interesting one was the first one who contacted me after 5 months of no contact to apologize to me. I told her there was nothing to be sorry for and I hope she was going good. An hour later she texts me inviting me to meet her at a bar. I do and she ends up coming home with me and we have sex that night and then again in the morning. She left and I never hear from her again. Definitely did not see that one coming.

How about you?

I dated a couple of girls like that. In truth, there's absolutely nothing worse than someone who dumps you but won't leave you alone.



The first one jerked me around like that for months. The second one completely broke my heart and then called me up four months later as if nothing had happened. I simply said, "Okay, here's the deal. Be honest with me. Are you wanting to date once again? If so, great. If not, I really don't to go through all that again."



Then she said, "Well, I'd like to be friends."



My reply, "That's really nice of you, but I have enough friends, thanks."
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Old 12-16-2019, 05:23 PM
 
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,680 posts, read 41,529,573 times
Reputation: 41302
Quote:
Originally Posted by brz85 View Post
Just curious on others experiences. Over the last 4 years I've had 4 women break up with me only to contact me a few months later.

All 4 gave me the generic "I'm not sure if I want a relationship right now" excuse or something along those lines when breaking up with me. One did have ex drama.

Probably the most interesting one was the first one who contacted me after 5 months of no contact to apologize to me. I told her there was nothing to be sorry for and I hope she was going good. An hour later she texts me inviting me to meet her at a bar. I do and she ends up coming home with me and we have sex that night and then again in the morning. She left and I never hear from her again. Definitely did not see that one coming.

How about you?
I was the dumper and my ex didn’t even wait a week to contact me to beg for another chance. From now on I’m sticking to the letter of my law. Once I’m done with someone romantically, I’m blocking them, NO exceptions.
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Old 12-16-2019, 07:14 PM
 
15,013 posts, read 21,564,498 times
Reputation: 12334
Quote:
Originally Posted by brz85 View Post
I was just thinking back on all my relationships over the past 4 years and just realized that every one got back in contact with me after they broke it off. Was just curious on others experiences.

Having been gotten back together with a few times, I have come to the conclusion that it's nothing to be flattered about. In all likelihood, they just lacked better options or had no other options and that's why they came back to you. In other words, you're not all that great, they just were desperate from not having anybody else. Might as well go back to the familiar and easy, right? I don't say this to be mean, I say this so you don't hold on to any false hopes that it was true love or some nonsense. Instead just ignore them or reject them and move on.
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Old 12-16-2019, 07:24 PM
 
Location: Texas
13,480 posts, read 8,292,160 times
Reputation: 25941
Don't take someone who dumped you back. Do not take them back! They wanted to move on in life, then they should do just that! Not come around to use you when it's convenient for them or they get bored.
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Old 12-16-2019, 10:42 PM
 
1,350 posts, read 808,738 times
Reputation: 2648
Makes you look desperate. That you've been sitting by the phone this whole time.

I've never contacted someone I broke up with (I am a girl). But, I have been contacted by plenty that either it was mutual, or he moved away so we ended it, etc. I didn't want to go back to them, I prefer to move forward in life. I would just wish them well and that was the end of it.
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Old 12-16-2019, 11:04 PM
 
Location: Kaliforneea
2,518 posts, read 2,035,438 times
Reputation: 5258
So the scenario is: we're going out, she dumps me, and then contacts me again to either date again, or be just friends:


zero. Zero times that has happened to me.


If I were a video game, I have zero replay value, it would seem.


Now in the other direction, girls I have called up 'just for old time sake'. I have gotten flat-out refusals, milquetoast offers for friendship, maybe try and go out again... sure a handful of times. But nothing that ever worked-out long term. Some concepts are confined to pop song lyrics:



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xz4YQZ01Q_A
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