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I am 40 years old female, I am divorced no kids ,
Unfortunately, I had no chance to focus my career.( I have my bachelor)
I was taking care of my elderly mother in-law and father in law
Also my father was had cancer treatment for long period of time.
My husband was provider and I was staying home.
Now , I recently single ( divorce 1 year ago)
I am trying online dating .
I see lot of men’s profile mentions ( they want some who make 50000 +)
I dont make that much
I rarely see profile where they men is not interested how much women is making .
Some guys tried to contact me and their first question was what I do for living ?
I think they wanted to know how much I am making .
Do you think am I wasting time ?
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,937 posts, read 36,957,550 times
Reputation: 40635
Use sites that don't have income. I can't even recall the last one that did.
Asking what someone does is just an icebreaker. It's a means to know what they do with most of their time, and largely to know what they are passionate about: chemistry, political work, social causes, literature, etc.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,937 posts, read 36,957,550 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by RbccL
Try a different dating site? I never got asked that question.
It used to be a question on paid sites like match long ago. Maybe it still is. I never answered it, and I don't know anyone actually paying for OLD these days. No reason to.
Places like DC can be very status orientated. Lots of people in politics and who are upwardly mobile. It may be that people are looking for people with similar status goals (not a match for the OP obviously), or trying to figure out what side they work for.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,737,988 times
Reputation: 41381
Quote:
Originally Posted by Victoria111
I am 40 years old female, I am divorced no kids ,
Unfortunately, I had no chance to focus my career.( I have my bachelor)
I was taking care of my elderly mother in-law and father in law
Also my father was had cancer treatment for long period of time.
My husband was provider and I was staying home.
Now , I recently single ( divorce 1 year ago)
I am trying online dating .
I see lot of men’s profile mentions ( they want some who make 50000 +)
I dont make that much
I rarely see profile where they men is not interested how much women is making .
Some guys tried to contact me and their first question was what I do for living ?
I think they wanted to know how much I am making .
Do you think am I wasting time ?
Or do I have to try my luck ?
Thanks in advance
I live in DC and I think you just have to try and let the chips fall whenever. The reality is that DC is a very image conscious and status driven town which is also very expensive. Men here are not going to want to date someone that will drain them as far as supporting them financially. Not saying that is your situation but it is a reality of living here. I want someone who is independent and able to support themselves. Other men will go one step above that and want someone who has an established career.
Just my opinion, but I think DC is an AWFUL place to date for everyone. I’m not going to aggressively pursue dating until I get out of here.
Wow. People actually post income requirements in DC?!?! For real?
Yes.
And although I was never explicit, I too considered it when viewing profiles. Career and middle class status was enough for me.
A few ladies one a doctor and another a small business owner stated $150k and $200k min to 'keep up with me' flaunting their wealthy homes and toys. Those were easy enough to block and remove from future search results. I don't miss OLD.
It used to be a question on paid sites like match long ago. Maybe it still is. I never answered it, and I don't know anyone actually paying for OLD these days. No reason to.
Places like DC can be very status orientated. Lots of people in politics and who are upwardly mobile. It may be that people are looking for people with similar status goals (not a match for the OP obviously), or trying to figure out what side they work for.
Oh, that’s right, I have seen the question as part of setting up a profile. POF maybe? I didn’t answer, don’t care what the other person answered with. I can see how that may be area-specific, but still...to me it’s also ”character-specific“ of the person asking.
After meeting so many people from OLD I can say it’s definitely not about the income. Just having a job, some interests, and chemistry is challenging enough.
A few ladies one a doctor and another an small business owner stated $150k and $200k min to 'keep up with me' flaunting their wealthy homes and toys. Those were easy enough to block and remove from future search results. I don't miss OLD.
It's a shame. There's this one woman that lives in a very backwater area of my county. I actually had her as a FB friend and happened to see her on Match. She was requiring the guy make 6-figures a year. Where I live, it's mostly restaurant (service work) retail (big box stores), clerical work, and blue collar jobs. Very low-key hourly positions where I live.
She is pushing 50 and is just a photographer. (Those are a dime a dozen around here, next to LMTs, and essential oils salespeople, lol) I could understand her being in her 20s and 30s demanding that amount, but approaching the AARP card carrying age....she needs to be realistic.
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