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There is this girl through work who my boss is trying to set me up with. She doesn't work with me or for my company, just a company we work with on this project (Shes with the architect and I'm with the construction company). I've only actually met her in person briefly twice, and we have occasional brief conversations on the phone related to work. Also, I will soon be assigned to a new project.
I was wondering if I should ask her if "we should get together sometime" or "meet for lunch sometime"? Would this be okay? Would you be okay with this in a similar situation? My boss actually sent her over to my office to talk about "work" the other day, hoping I would maybe ask her out. I haven't really joked with her or anything. I feel so much more comfortable asking a girl out after there is a laugh or two or some flirting. We just briefly talked about where we live etc. We don't really know each other well, but I'm not worried about the whole work thing. I just don't want her to be in an uncomfortable position of feeling weird turning me down if she's not interested.
And please, no preaching about how my boss shouldn't try to set us up or anything. I'm attracted to her and glad he is trying.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,715,076 times
Reputation: 41376
No, no, and HELL no! I’d keep your boss as far away from your dating life as possible and this would include set ups. If it doesn’t work out, it will probably p$&@ your boss off. Not worth the risk.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,930,903 times
Reputation: 40635
Why do you need help figuring this out? If you want to ask someone out, and it isn't inappropriate, then do so. I mean, why ask strangers. This isn't rocket science.
Yes, yes, yes, ask her out. You have an interest in her; act on it. Soon, you will be transferred to another project, and, I'm guessing, won't have further work-related interaction with her and that should mitigate any uncomfortable interactions re dating someone in a work environment.
I might tell her that you've enjoyed your conversations and interactions with her related to the project and would like to get to know her more. "Would you like to have lunch with me sometime?"
I see you're taking her feelings into great consideration.
I don't see why you asking her out would make her feel anymore weird turning you down than it would say, any other guy. You like her, ask her out its that simple. It's not like you are her boss or anything.
If your boss is really trying to set you up, then have him go full steam on it, and ask her directly if she'd be interested in being set up on a date with you. I can say as a woman that if I'm not interested, it would be less awkward for her to tell him thanks, but no thanks as opposed to having to turn you down to your face if you asked directly.
And if she is interested, she will be happy to hear that's a possibility and be glad to tell him that yes, of course, she'd love to hear from you and at that point, you can go ahead and call her and make a date. Under the circumstances, I'd make it a little bit nicer than a typical "first time meeting" date though
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,715,076 times
Reputation: 41376
Quote:
Originally Posted by Frank Purlin
When in doubt, always kiss the girl.
Not smart advice in 2019 at all.
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