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Old 01-02-2020, 02:58 PM
 
4,382 posts, read 2,270,016 times
Reputation: 4633

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That could very well be it. Socioeconomic thing and strict family that wouldnt approve.

Although she said shes a student, and the US isnt like a closed class system like Britain or India.

Its not like OP is a criminal or meth user, not far as I know. It would be hardcore shallowness to not give her credit where shes owed it.

 
Old 01-02-2020, 03:04 PM
 
Location: Mr. Roger's Neighborhood
4,087 posts, read 2,541,676 times
Reputation: 12489
Quote:
Originally Posted by moongirl00 View Post
That could very well be it. Socioeconomic thing and strict family that wouldnt approve.

Although she said shes a student, and the US isnt like a closed class system like Britain or India.

Its not like OP is a criminal or meth user, not far as I know. It would be hardcore shallowness to not give her credit where shes owed it.
Our O.P. seems like a kind and genuine person who is doing her best to get ahead in life and deserves far better treatment than she has received from others over the years.

I hope that things work out for the best for her--I truly do, but nothing about this seems right in the least. The rushed marriage, the full compartmentalization of her husband's life that includes a heck of a lot of poor excuses for his behavior. None of it properly adds up no matter how I run the mental numbers that we've been given...
 
Old 01-02-2020, 03:06 PM
 
22,284 posts, read 21,662,335 times
Reputation: 54735
Apparently OP hasn't even confirmed if he was able to tell his family at Christmas, his second opportunity. It seems as it these newlyweds haven't talked in over a week.
 
Old 01-02-2020, 03:12 PM
 
4,382 posts, read 2,270,016 times
Reputation: 4633
Quote:
Originally Posted by Formerly Known As Twenty View Post
Our O.P. seems like a kind and genuine person who is doing her best to get ahead in life and deserves far better treatment than she has received from others over the years.

I hope that things work out for the best for her--I truly do, but nothing about this seems right in the least. The rushed marriage, the full compartmentalization of her husband's life that includes a heck of a lot of poor excuses for his behavior. None of it properly adds up no matter how I run the mental numbers that we've been given...
Its not adding up.

My grandmother had a rough upbringing and "married up," and it was all on the up and up. So it can happen and I truly wish its going to work out well for OP.

But him acting so secretive is concerning. I cant fathom why he would marry someone he feels he must keep secret.
 
Old 01-02-2020, 03:49 PM
 
Location: Suburb of Chicago
31,848 posts, read 17,547,329 times
Reputation: 29384
Belle, you seem to eek out little bits of information here and there and remain vague on some details.

We're trying to help you but you could be making it easier. Can you take a moment to answers the questions we've posed?
 
Old 01-02-2020, 03:53 PM
 
8,085 posts, read 5,223,998 times
Reputation: 22685
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
Here is the quote from her thread about it just over a year ago, when someone asked her what they fought about to end their FWB situation:
But then later she posted he had been making her "do things" and that the whole time he had a girlfriend.
So who knows what the story is...
 
Old 01-02-2020, 03:54 PM
 
1,350 posts, read 814,397 times
Reputation: 2648
Quote:
Originally Posted by zentropa View Post
Apparently OP hasn't even confirmed if he was able to tell his family at Christmas, his second opportunity. It seems as it these newlyweds haven't talked in over a week.
I think she said Christmas was when his sister announced her pregnancy and he didn't want to over shadow the news. Is what he told her.

As far as him being an auditor, I knew someone married to an auditor and he did work out of town around this time of year, and OP's husband *could* have gone from his parents' straight to his out-of-town job, and that is why they did not spend New Year's Eve together. And, this out of town career could be why he mentioned to her that he was going to take her to Paris (previously).

NOT sticking up for this guy... he is completely shady.... Just filling in some of the blanks. He used to/still is, paid her for "sex acts" and they still keep separate residences, so he could have just kept that going. WHY did he marry her though, and so quickly?
 
Old 01-02-2020, 04:08 PM
 
13,262 posts, read 7,980,529 times
Reputation: 30753
There IS something wrong with this whole thing.


He should be proud to show you off. THAT is the norm.


I can understand being a bit nervous about telling parents...but his over-riding love for you should be COMPELLING him to tell his family about you. IF he wanted to tell them in person, then he should've done it at Thanksgiving. But he didn't at Thanksgiving, and so he needed Christmas to tell them? Nope. Not right. And YOU should have your feelings hurt over this, and YOU should INSIST that you get an introduction.


And he's telling you that you can't live as a couple yet? Puhlease! He can't throw some clothes and essentials in a suitcase and move in with YOU on a temporary basis? Again...Y'all are newly weds, and he's treating you like a second class citizen.


Put your foot down on this belle. Insist on meeting the parents, or at least talking on the phone. This is NOT right.
 
Old 01-02-2020, 04:42 PM
 
6,953 posts, read 4,422,448 times
Reputation: 22717
If you have a key to his apartment go over while he is gone. Did you google him? I wouldn’t contact his parents. You don’t know how severe his reaction will be. Personally I don’t care if my son’s marry at the same financial/economical level. I just want them happy.
 
Old 01-02-2020, 04:45 PM
 
Location: Moreno Valley, Ca
4,038 posts, read 2,698,890 times
Reputation: 8479
Quote:
Originally Posted by belle woods View Post
No we didn’t get married for sex. That’s just crazy.
The entire situation is crazy. Wake up.
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