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I like the weekend visit deal but also maybe meeting somewhere in between the first time? That drive up I-75 from Atlanta doesn't take that long getting to Chattanooga. Maybe, when the weather's nice, meet and go to Rock City, or take her youngster through Ruby Falls. Need to remember, she's not the only one you need to get to know.
I almost forgot to add this, it was very possible that I could have saw her in September of last year (2019), but due to her previous job having her to work more overtime it just wasn’t going to work it just wasn’t good timing.
She’s also agreed to go on a Date with me when I go see/visit her.
But you said it has to be this June because of her job. So how do you know she won't cancel again this June, after you've waited 5 more months?
She's "agreed to go on a date with you when you go see her"? I thought you were going for one week. That's one long date...
As others have said, plan a weekend visit... soon... This sounds like a wishful fantasy in your mind, and you need to see if there is any reality to the two of you. Then if things work out with the short meeting in person now, then you two can look forward to your long June visit.
Unless she was raped and kept the child (in which my esteem for her would swell to almost unprecedented highs) or widowed you can extrapolate that she, at a minimum, makes bad choices. In the just 30 pool you should be able to find a woman without baggage. Moreover, I would not have a woman who would not put her child first, so if she is a woman of quality you are signing up to always play second string to her child's needs, is that what you truly want to sign up for? There are quality women 30 and under who do not come with strings attached.
I have dated women who have children and put them first, and that is how it should be. But I am an older adult male, with my own life and I am no longer looking to build a life with someone as much as simply being mutual seasoning in someone else's already complete life. You are young, your scope of interest should normally be focused on finding someone to build a life with. Why handicap yourself at a still young age. Time will force picking from other's discards in a few years, why hurry the process?
As an FYI, I meet people on line and it is my preferred method. It makes vetting easy and painless for all concerned. I would your question, at your age, your selection criteria. I know some young guys who target women with children simply because they do not want to fall in love and start a "real" relationship yet so it makes it easy for them to remain emotionally detached; they simply let the relationship drift until the woman will not put up with it any longer and then onto the next one. But you have not indicated that type of reasoning.
Additionally this could be a great relationship for her and you if set the parameters. But I just don't get that read from what you have written.
Last edited by GhostOfAndrewJackson; 01-25-2020 at 05:32 PM..
REALITY CHECK!!!
You don't know someone until you have met and interacted in person. Even meeting with someone once in a while does not give you enough information to objectively judge their situation and character. It's easy to put your best foot forward and say things when you don't need to prove anything.
Update: She has agreed “Today” to meet me halfway in Chattanooga in either March or April for a weekend date but it won’t be easy because she would have to do it when she doesn’t have her son. I took everyone’s advice here seriously, so I thank all of you in this thread that contributed because without you all I wouldn’t have an extra 2nd date lined up. I definitely give BirdieBelle a shoutout, your idea really helped me. As far as me getting a week in June, again no guarantee, if it was just a few days I would be happy with that.
Honestly even though I’m 30, I don’t have a lot of “Dating” experience. I’ve only had 1 Girlfriend before and that was when I was in HS.
In response to some of the posts here I’m not really bothered that she’s a single mother I think mostly due to me understanding her situation & basically connecting with her. I just hope that all turns out well & we continue to build & yes she also agreed to build & grow with me. Also her child will always be 1st, I know & understand that & I’m ok with that.
But you said it has to be this June because of her job. So how do you know she won't cancel again this June, after you've waited 5 more months?
She's "agreed to go on a date with you when you go see her"? I thought you were going for one week. That's one long date...
As others have said, plan a weekend visit... soon... This sounds like a wishful fantasy in your mind, and you need to see if there is any reality to the two of you. Then if things work out with the short meeting in person now, then you two can look forward to your long June visit.
Really what happened was she found another job in October, so that changed things around because she was working overtime from her previous job mandatory. Originally I was supposed to meet her from September 25th - September 27th but she warned me about her finding a new job. I’m glad she found a new job, I still wondering what those couple of days would have been like with her.
Now I know people like put fake profiles/fake identity on social media, but that’s not the case here. I don’t have any physical proximity with her yet, but she’s always been very honest with me. I’ve heard her voice enough & long enough to know & even though I haven’t video chatted with her yet I’ve seen her in her own videos (multiple) videos & her voice, looks matches her identity.
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