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Old 01-27-2020, 03:51 PM
 
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,772,419 times
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I see it often with people with kids. Extended families going camping or whatever.
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Old 01-27-2020, 04:28 PM
 
Location: Arizona
8,230 posts, read 8,560,381 times
Reputation: 27520
Lots of people do it.

They are family. You're still a maybe.
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Old 01-27-2020, 04:37 PM
 
Location: a primitive state
11,373 posts, read 24,346,804 times
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Maybe they didn’t want to pay your airfare? Maybe they wanted quality time with their kids, solo? Maybe they didn’t think things through?

It doesn’t sound like a big issue. Your initial impulse to say “yes” was correct.
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Old 01-27-2020, 04:54 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
49,932 posts, read 59,640,807 times
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I think it’s nice.

As people get older and “life” gets in the way, sometime the only quality time you get with your adult kids is on a trip, especially if you live in different areas. And the family dynamic really is different without SOs around.

I hope my sons don’t see trips with me as off limits.
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Old 01-27-2020, 04:56 PM
 
Location: SoCal again
20,687 posts, read 19,833,013 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dolce de leche View Post
Does anyone go on vacation with their parents as an adult? Especially if you are in a relationship? I find it very strange. The last time I went on a vacation with my parents I was like 14-15 years old. My dad is dead, and don't get me wrong, I'm super close to my mom, and I love spending time with her, but I feel like you reach a certain age in your late teens when vacationing with your parents is not really interesting or exciting. And then you start your own relationship and live your own life and don't really have to go and travel with your parents. I spend time with my mom talk on the phone several times a week. Me and my boyfriend come for a dinner pretty regularly, and I also make sure that I come over by myself often,so me and her can just hang out. I'm also there for all holidays and important dates. But it never really crossed my mind that I should leave my boyfriend and go for a vacation for a week or so just with my mom. I feel like as an adult you have your own separate life. When I have kids, I will for sure take them on the trips with me when they are little, but I would never pressure them to travel with me when they are adults and have their own relationships or families.

So I'm asking this, because I have a problem with my relationship right now. Me and my boyfriend are together for 2.5 years and live together. I think things are moving towards proposal, wedding and kids. We talk about it, nothing happened yet, but all i'm trying to say is that the relationship is pretty serious, we are very close and almost like a family. In summer, his mom just got this idea out of nowhere. how here and my boyfriend's dad will rent a house in Florida (we live in Canada) for a winter, and that my boyfriend and his sister (who is also in a serious long term relationship) should come and visit them for a week, but without me and his sister's boyfriend. When he told me about it for the first time and asked me if I was ok with that, I have stupidly said yes. I guess I felt like I'll be a horrible person for standing between him and his family, and also its just family, not like he is going on some kind of party Las Vegas trip with a bunch of guys. He even said he didn't want to go originally, but for some reason his mom was very insisting and she just bought airplane tickets for him and his sister without even him agreeing to this. At first I thought it was ok, but then the time was getting closer I have realized that I'm not ok with it at all. I know I can't really hold this against him, because I said yes, but now he left and I'm just not ok. Like I said I understand that the family is important, and its good and normal to spend time with your parents. I actually told him that he should go and visit them without me more often. I'm ok with that and have no problem. But the whole traveling thing is bothering me. I don't think its ok for people to go on separate vacations when they are in a relationship. I have no desire to go on some trip without him, and he keeps calling and telling me how it is so hard to be without me. We are very close to each other, so this is difficult. I'm just confused and don't understand why his mom would do this and insist on a familly vacation from her 30+ year old children who are having their own relationships and lives. Do people actually do that and is this normal, and I'm just living in denial? Do people who are 30+ just leave their spouses, girlfriends or boyfriends and go south for vacation with their moms and dads? Seems surreal to me.

I understand that the parents want to see their kids, but why can't they just ask him to come for a weekend to visit without me? Why can't they visit and I can just go out see some friends or my mom? There are so many ways to spend time together. Why there has to be the whole vacation to take him on with flying on the airplane, going to another country etc.? I also would totally be ok if they lived there and he went to visit. I just feel this whole vacation thing is unnecessary. You don't need to plan a trip to spend time with your family.
It's not him, it's you. Are you going to counseling? You seem to have issues. Mod cut.

Last edited by PJSaturn; 02-04-2020 at 11:35 PM.. Reason: Off-topic; personal attack.
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Old 01-27-2020, 05:27 PM
 
Location: Richmond VA
6,871 posts, read 7,829,722 times
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Probably just as well you didn't go. You don't sound like very much fun.
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Old 01-27-2020, 06:35 PM
 
12,918 posts, read 16,782,265 times
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Yes, if they are a healthy functioning family.
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Old 01-27-2020, 07:15 PM
 
7,235 posts, read 7,009,413 times
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I love my mom but we do NOT travel well together. No family vacations for us.
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Old 01-27-2020, 10:49 PM
 
30,869 posts, read 36,789,988 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thinkalot View Post
Lots of people do it.

They are family. You're still a maybe.
Since they're not married, this is what I'm wondering, too.
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Old 01-27-2020, 11:14 PM
 
2,048 posts, read 2,139,217 times
Reputation: 7247
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nov3 View Post
In due time OP you actually might understand THAT family IS important . Your entire post had the underlying message that you really don't value family in it's truest sense.
Let's just say you are growing and some day you'll truly grasp the value of sharing time with kin.
And when you have been dating someone for 2.5 years and all signs point to marriage--that someone is not family??
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