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In retrospect, my very few heartbreaks were more akin to a bruised ego and not achieving the scenario that I had visualized. Of course, at the time they happened, I felt very hurt and full of heartache inside my chest. But there were no permanent scars left. I think it's all a matter of ones mindset. I am not a person that likes wallowing in misery. If someone didn't return my affections I just moved on. And looking back, it was all for the best. I have zero regrets over who I liked and also there isn't anyone that I still regret not being my "one".
I think that some people get too melodramatic and emotional about this love stuff. They are too focused on the emotional highs of love and think that it's proof of true love, when it's not. All those heady emotions are more to do with sexual attraction and infatuation. And some people, when the infatuation feeling is fading away, try to replace it with a cycle of fighting for the protestations of love and makeup reconciliation sex afterwards. And that's really unhealthy.
So True!
Yes there's a big difference between egoic love and true love. Many people (I was one) think that co dependence is love. You can become addicted to someone and mistake that for love. If someone feels scared at the thought of "losing" another, its not a healthy thing. You cannot lose what you never had. Real love does not take ownership of someone, when you Love someone you accept them as their own individual rather than "yours". Love is not possesive, fear and co dependence are.
I thought i was in love with my ex- fiance. We dated for 7 years. Then I met my husband and realize now that I had no idea what to be loved, or to love someone was really like until now... Soo Im betting alot of people think they are in love, but really have no idea..: )
If a relationship is not meant to be, then let it go. Sometimes it's because of a bad choice, a personality or values clash, the timing isn't right... but why fight it? And maybe in high school, we naively thought that there was only one special person for us in the whole world... but later on, we know that in reality, there are many potential compatible people out there for us, we just have to bump into them.
As an optimist, I'd rather learn from my failed relationships and start the next one wiser and with a clean slate. Maybe it's a pain to start anew, but I think that a good relationship is well worth that effort. And the bad relationships make us appreciate a good one all the more. I take nothing for granted and I also know that all relationships need constant grooming and maintenance.
Not you robyn. Morning, I'm getting ready to hit the hay. Getting off work at 3am is no fun anymore
Oh thank goodness. i thought I was on the dork squad... lol.
Is that why you are so early in the morning posting on here?
hope you got good rest. I think thats about what time I started falling asleep good, then got up a couple hours later. Now, I can hardly stay awake. Just a few more work hours left....
I made another poll about how often one has fallen in love, it appears most people only fall in love a few times. But who can really define what falling in love means? So we ask the question: How many times have you had your heart completely broken..? Probably a more accurate indicator of how many times you've really fallen in love, and something that makes a much bigger and longer lasting impact. To be clear this time, I'm talking about a deep cut. You were all in the pot, and you lost (emotionally). This could be due to cheating, divorce, breakups, a nasty moment or comment that ended everything right then and there (even if the relationship continued afterwards). We'll only count moments that occured after you were 16.
For me the answer is none. I've been rejected before but never had true heartbreak. When it happens it'll really cut deep, because I rarely open up to anyone.
Share your thoughts, especially those of you who are 'battle-weary' so to speak. I expect to hear much from the goof troop (a.k.a. the four women who always post in the relationship forum, a.k.a. the dork brigade)
Wow now I think I understand when i voted on the how many times have you fallen in love i thought I don't think i've ever fallin in love but as far as heartbroken i've been hurt plenty of times but i don't think i was in love with the guy...........I was in a happy relationship and then one day he just up and rolled moved out of state and didn't came back for like 9 months.......I wasn't in love with him but i was happy with him i had feelings for hiim i was faithful to him......i broke things off when he decided that he'd be out of town and didn't know for how long and he had strung me along for 3 months........i felt hurt that he left without offering to give me a choice of coming with him i felt hurt that he wouldn't say goodbye to me i felt hurt that he made me to believe that we were happy together meanwhile he must have been lacking something to just up and leave like that and be gone for so long............so i say i was heart broken in that case but i don't believe i was in love.........another case i will say on a separate post so it won't be too long
Oh thank goodness. i thought I was on the dork squad... lol.
Is that why you are so early in the morning posting on here?
hope you got good rest. I think thats about what time I started falling asleep good, then got up a couple hours later. Now, I can hardly stay awake. Just a few more work hours left....
Don't kid yourself, you're totally on the dork squad.
Although I would like to make the motion to change the name from "dork squad or brigade" to "sexy mamacita squad" yeah?
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That's what I'm talk'n about!
I believe we have a name change...
zzzzzzsssssssssstttttttttt
Thanks for another laugh high....I'm under the influence of laughter, I could be dangerous around a computer. I cannot not be held accountable for my actions or words.
Thanks for another laugh high....I'm under the influence of laughter, I could be dangerous around a computer. I cannot not be held accountable for my actions or words.
I was just being a brat, as I normally am. I don't really like the term mamacita... I know it can mean a young girl, but I get a mental image of a fat woman with a half dozen kids. Certainly can't identify with that... Well, with the first part I could if I tried... Also, I'm pretty sick of being taken for a Mexican and being talked to in Spanish. In AZ, if you're not a blonde, you just have to be a Mexican... Not that there is anything wrong with that.... just I'm not.
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Not you robyn. Morning, I'm getting ready to hit the hay. Getting off work at 3am is no fun anymore 
)
Not that there is anything wrong with that.... just I'm not.
