What makes you admire your partner in your relationship?
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The man that I have admired the most besides my father was my boyfriend when I was 30. He’s honest to a fault, loyal, kind, caring, loving, fun, positive, and extremely innovative. I was never big on marriage, but I wanted to marry him at that time. It was a wrong timeline for him when he’s still struggling to succeed in his career. I wasn’t patient enough to wait for him. When he’s ready (or woke up after I left) six months later, I already moved back to my hometown which made it long distance for us. If he and I had known what we know now, one of us would have moved to spend the rest of our lives together. We realized that after both of our failed marriages, but life responsibilities kept us from moving near each other again. Decades later, I still have fond memories and great admiration for him.
He is basically the kindest, most compassionate person I've ever known. He was raised right.
Secondarily, he is calm and steady in a crisis. He is wired for emergency management.
Ultra involved father...and genuinely enjoys the kids...not just sharing the load, but really relishes the role. He values family very much...his family of origin, mine, and our nuclear family.
He is a teacher...not employed as one, though he has been, but more that he is a rich resource of knowledge and always thirsty to learn, interested in so many things. Definitely not shallow or boring.
He is creative. He can conceptualize something and then build it from scratch with whatever is handy. He can McGyver pretty much anything.
When it comes to financial matters, not only are we on the same page, we’re on the same paragraph. He was (before retirement) a hard worker. Worked at the same place 37 years. He would do anything possible for his kids. Doesn’t smoke, rarely drinks, no drugs.
As I list these qualities, most are the opposite of my first husband. Not surprising. Choosing a second spouse, like choosing a second house, you know what you DON’T want.
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