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No I'm still planning on sending the goodbye text in an hour. Im contemplating not saying anything at all though. I'm really on the fence about which one to do. I dont even know what I really want right now. Part of me wants to move on and find a new guy, the other part wants to be with him. So Im trying to understand what the heck action is going to render me the outcome I actually want if I have no idea what that is. My brain says move on, my heart says wait.
He broke up with you. So.... can't really be with him, now can you?
I feel bad for you, for having no self esteem. My strong suggestion is you really ought to see a therapist and work on getting a back bone. You will need that for the rest of your life.
Oh, and this guy?? No Goodbye Text. You dated less than 2 months. He already broke up with you (and by text, too, showing YOU disrespect), told you "don't be around when his ex comes by". Then texts you the same night at 2AM to see if you were up for some no-strings sex.
Which part of this screams to you - That he wants to be in a relationship with you?
If you send that Goodbye text, you will look so pathetic and desperate and if that is really how you want to look to HIM.... then hey, go ahead and show him what you really are. You will regret that you sent it, though. As long as you're ready to live with the aftermath, then hey, do what you want.
I keep replaying what he said, "I cant say yes or no" to my question about him being with other women. Thats the fuel keeping me strong right now. I will send the goodbye text soon. Depending on if he fights for me, and how much he fights for me, if at all...will determine my next course of action. In the meantime, Ive re-downloaded my dating apps.
I also say no to this goodbye text because I do not think this is truly about saying goodbye. You are hoping that telling him this will be a wake up call for him and he will realize just how much you mean to him. He showed how little he valued you especially with the attempted booty call text after you told him you do not want FWB. He knows how much you care and does not appear to be above using it to get what he wants. Even if he decides to fight for you, that does not mean he would be being sincere. He has shown you who he is; believe him. If you keep clinging to who he portrayed himself to be during the love bombing or play the pick me dance hoping he will go back to valuing you as much as he seemed to in the beginning, you are setting yourself up for a world of hurt.
My bf would text me all day every day, instantly. Was super affectionate, sending kissy faces etc. This past week he became very distant, taking 5-7 hours to respond to a single text and less affectionate. This went on for about 4 days and then he said he didnt want to hang out this weekend because he had plans with his guy friend.
He said he had been going through a lot at work and dealing with drama so thats why hes been stressed lately when I asked him if something was wrong because he was being distant. The drama he's referring to, is his ex comes back into town from her out of town job to pick up her things at their apartment that they shared together, she broke up with him 2 months ago, and he says he's moving out at the end of May for this reason. This is obviously suspicious and I think she may be the real reason why he's been distant towards me all the sudden. He said he doesnt know when she comes back but its sometime at the end of the month since they dont talk, his words. He said I probably shouldn't be there when she comes over out of respect.
This weekend when he hung out with his friend, he texts me saying he was going to ask me to come out with him earlier but he was already heading home. I said well you knew I wanted to see you tonight, but ok thats fine.
I noticed he would be active on instagram but not text me for hours one day so I said again, hey I'm here if you need to talk about anything I haven't heard from you. He said "Listen I'm not going to deal with the suffocation. I told you I'm going through a lot right now in my life and that I would be busy this weekend and you've been constantly worried for days. I'm sorry, this is absurd." I said "Ok I will give you space, I know you're stressed I just noticed the communication go down so thats why I've been asking."
No reply from him and its been 3 days. This all changed suddenly and now I dont even know if we are still going to be together or if I will hear from him. What should I do?
Let him be. You already came forward and served the let’s hang out invitation. Ball is in his court. If he wants to be a big baby you’re not gonna change him. You’ve been stung two months abd he’s a rebound date. I wouldn’t put too much energy into it.
One thing I learned from my dating days (and while it’s been a long time...people don’t change)...you never date anyone who just came out of a rekationship. I would say 4 months minimum. Anything under 1 month forget it. Either she or he are comparing everything you do with their ex.
Wow, I texted him saying "Im going to move on because I cant be just friends, that would hurt me. I deserve to be in a relationship with someone who wants to be with me. Blessings to you." and he literally INSTANTLY deleted me on instagram before I could delete him, in less than a minute after he read that. He didnt reply. Wtf? Wasnt he the one who broke up with me? What is that about?
Wow, I texted him saying "Im going to move on because I cant be just friends, that would hurt me. I deserve to be in a relationship with someone who wants to be with me. Blessings to you." and he literally INSTANTLY deleted me on instagram before I could delete him, in less than a minute after he read that. He didnt reply. Wtf? Wasnt he the one who broke up with me? What is that about?
Ok, dang, fine. Guess thats my answer lol.
He probably knew you were going to delete him so he tried to beat you to the punch....just reinforces how pathetic this guy is, and what an ego! You are well rid of him, I don’t think he’s a nice guy and I really mean that not just saying it to make you feel better. A selfish guy with a big ego, that’s a good one to stay away from!!!
Wow, I texted him saying "Im going to move on because I cant be just friends, that would hurt me. I deserve to be in a relationship with someone who wants to be with me. Blessings to you." and he literally INSTANTLY deleted me on instagram before I could delete him, in less than a minute after he read that. He didnt reply. Wtf? Wasnt he the one who broke up with me? What is that about?
Ok, dang, fine. Guess thats my answer lol.
Well, we tried to spare you from this.
Hopefully this feeling will prevent you from going there next time.
Wow, I texted him saying "Im going to move on because I cant be just friends, that would hurt me. I deserve to be in a relationship with someone who wants to be with me. Blessings to you." and he literally INSTANTLY deleted me on instagram before I could delete him, in less than a minute after he read that. He didnt reply. Wtf? Wasnt he the one who broke up with me? What is that about?
Ok, dang, fine. Guess thats my answer lol.
He just did what we all wanted you to do, that's all. It's always more fun to be the person who does it than the person who receives it, and I really wanted that for you. But at any rate, it's over for now and that's a really, really good thing for you, even if short term it feels terrible and like a huge loss. But now go no contact for real! Even if he reappears! Not even a black hole is going to be as dark and silent as you should go now.
Last edited by typical_guinea_pig; 05-20-2020 at 08:35 PM..
Wow, I texted him saying "Im going to move on because I cant be just friends, that would hurt me. I deserve to be in a relationship with someone who wants to be with me. Blessings to you." and he literally INSTANTLY deleted me on instagram before I could delete him, in less than a minute after he read that. He didnt reply. Wtf? Wasnt he the one who broke up with me? What is that about?
Ok, dang, fine. Guess thats my answer lol.
He wanted to break up with you but still have you available to cuddle, have sex without a promise of anything. He didn't get what he wanted and that tells you how little he cared about you and your feelings.
Wow, I texted him saying "Im going to move on because I cant be just friends, that would hurt me. I deserve to be in a relationship with someone who wants to be with me. Blessings to you." and he literally INSTANTLY deleted me on instagram before I could delete him, in less than a minute after he read that. He didnt reply. Wtf? Wasnt he the one who broke up with me? What is that about?
Ok, dang, fine. Guess thats my answer lol.
Huh. I am SO surprised. Thought he was sincere about wanting to "just be friends". And he just wanted to cuddle, that's all. Deleting your Instagram in 2 seconds just doesn't sound like something a friend would do???
Guess he didn't want his ex to see it when she comes over. He's a big baby coward. Huge ego, too.
Now... BLOCK HIM on your phone.
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