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There are couples who survived cheating and their marriages became even stronger afterward. Takes a lot of inner work by both. I don't know if I could do it as it would depend on the circumstances.
That's true. Some couples may survive it but their relationship may hardly go back to the way it was. Also, the partner cheated on will always have this hidden suspicion and self-doubt. The cost of cheating in a committed relationship, even if both partners were able to work it out takes a life time to be paid in full. I don't think anyone in a committed relationship should engage in such unless they've made up their mind to breakup the relationship.
Ita....they don't deserve a 2nd chance.....specially if they hide it & lie about it for weeks or months. That's betraying you for more than just 1 night........
Some people are of the opinion that the circumstances that led to the cheating would determine if the cheating partner would be given a second chance. Do you think such justification hold water? Also, if a partner is deliberately denying the other of attention and sex, do you think that is a valid justification for cheating? And would you give a second chance under such circumstances?
Cheating is a deliberate act. The person that was supposedly committed to you (general you) decided that they were going to have sex with someone else and did. There's no excuse for that. If you're no longer interested in your significant other, then break up with them and have sex with whomever you'd like. Otherwise, there's the door. No second chances. No way, no how.
I really do like it when people have standard and clear boundaries in their relationships. Though sometimes, life may not just be as we intend it to be. What if you're madly in love with the partner that cheated and you may be at the losing end should the relationship break up, would you still stick to this your opinion of "no second chance"?
Location: As of 2022….back to SoCal. OC this time!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jadyclem
Some people are of the opinion that the circumstances that led to the cheating would determine if the cheating partner would be given a second chance. Do you think such justification hold water? Also, if a partner is deliberately denying the other of attention and sex, do you think that is a valid justification for cheating? And would you give a second chance under such circumstances?
IMO ...lying & cheating is still lying & cheating tho. If you don't know how they're feeling.....how can you both work on fixing it? Tell your partner you feel neglected & TALK about no sex. Cheating just adds more problems & breaks communication more.......it's not going to fix anything. AND...if you don't want to try to fix anything.......then just get out of the relationship & date or have sex with who you want. Any relationship is only as good as the communication & trust in it......cause if you don't have that, you don't really have a relationship IMO.
Some people are of the opinion that the circumstances that led to the cheating would determine if the cheating partner would be given a second chance. Do you think such justification hold water? Also, if a partner is deliberately denying the other of attention and sex, do you think that is a valid justification for cheating? And would you give a second chance under such circumstances?
What does "deliberately" mean? Out of spite? Because of depression? Lower drive? Physical issues? Physical issues they've tried to resolve but couldn't or physical issues they can't be bothered to check into?
IMO ...lying & cheating is still lying & cheating tho. If you don't know how they're feeling.....how can you both work on fixing it? Tell your partner you feel neglected & TALK about no sex. Cheating just adds more problems & breaks communication more.......it's not going to fix anything. AND...if you don't want to try to fix anything.......then just get out of the relationship & date or have sex with who you want. Any relationship is only as good as the communication & trust in it......cause if you don't have that, you don't really have a relationship IMO.
What does "deliberately" mean? Out of spite? Because of depression? Lower drive? Physical issues? Physical issues they've tried to resolve but couldn't or physical issues they can't be bothered to check into?
It could be out of spite or whatever may lead to it. Neglecting a partner's need - mostly their emotional and sexual needs for too long could be a deliberate act. Some partners get so selfish that the moment they have a minorl issue in their life they'll start taking it out on their significant other without any consideration to him or her.
I think if love is in a relationship, both partners will always find a way to meet each other's needs.
The only time clemency for infidelity should be considered is if the marriage is more of an economic arrangement for raising children than anything else. And even then there should be an understanding that the arrangement will come to an end once the children are grown and gone, or at least re-evaluated.
Location: As of 2022….back to SoCal. OC this time!
9,297 posts, read 4,577,093 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Toxic Waltz
The only time clemency for infidelity should be considered is if the marriage is more of an economic arrangement for raising children than anything else.
This is truly sad IMO. If there was already an arrangement........then it's not cheating. If the cheating happened before the arrangement tho......why would anybody want to stay with a cheater just to get an economic arrangement?
This is truly sad IMO. If there was already an arrangement........then it's not cheating. If the cheating happened before the arrangement tho......why would anybody want to stay with a cheater just to get an economic arrangement?
So the kids can grow up in their family home with both of their parents. Products of broken homes will passionately defend the broken home but kids are better off not being raised in one if possible. And unless you are a jaded misandrist you'll understand that it is usually, although not always, possible when people can act like adults. Of course fewer and fewer people are capable of acting like adults nowadays, which does throw a wrench in things.
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Tell your partner you feel neglected & TALK about no sex. Cheating just adds more problems & breaks communication more.......it's not going to fix anything. AND...if you don't want to try to fix anything.......then just get out of the relationship & date or have sex with who you want. Any relationship is only as good as the communication & trust in it......cause if you don't have that, you don't really have a relationship IMO.
