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Old 02-27-2021, 07:46 AM
 
Location: Central Virginia
6,512 posts, read 8,291,816 times
Reputation: 18578

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One? No.

Multiple? Yes.
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Old 02-27-2021, 01:16 PM
 
Location: a little corner of a very big universe
845 posts, read 700,485 times
Reputation: 2575
It would be a hard pass from me, but I've always been a teetotaler.
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Old 02-27-2021, 01:19 PM
 
Location: planet earth
8,620 posts, read 5,584,567 times
Reputation: 19636
It would all depend in how they looked in the mug shot.

I'm not kidding. I can tell a lot about a person from their mugshot(s). lol
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Old 02-27-2021, 03:37 PM
 
Location: North Idaho
32,482 posts, read 47,415,214 times
Reputation: 77686
I have no interest in dating an alcoholic or any casual recreational drinker who can't hold their liquor.
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Old 02-27-2021, 11:50 PM
 
Location: Mr. Roger's Neighborhood
4,085 posts, read 2,516,033 times
Reputation: 12484
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hankrigby View Post
Fair enough, I can imagine how going through all of that will make a person less likely to take the chance. I never lived with an alcoholic but it doesn't sound pleasant.

I had a deal breaker that I suspended on a long shot and met someone very important to me. Though I guess that deal breaker was a less important. Mine was against dating a guy more than five years younger than me. I met a guy liked him went on a few dates found out he was 8 years younger than me he was 22 and I was 30. Not that he wasn't attractive to me I just felt like I was creeping on a young guy didn't want to take advantage. Definitely a lot less of a gamble.

I see the words deal breaker and I think about me and my passed notions of deal breakers.

It's natural to take one's own experiences and apply them to both hypothetical experiences and the experiences of others. I'm glad that taking the risk of bending one of your personal deal-breakers worked out well for you.

I'm now partnered and slightly bent one of my former deal-breakers for my guy, so life definitely moved onward and upward post-divorce. My former spouse still struggles with his alcohol dependence, which still breaks my heart for him as he's a really decent human being and one of the best men I've ever known; a man of good character and great kindness.

There a very few other deal-breakers that I have/had (one key, set-into-stone one had a natural expiration date), but that particular one must always be held firm as I cannot bear witness to another man who I love self-destruct in such a manner.
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Old 02-28-2021, 01:11 AM
 
4,624 posts, read 2,162,645 times
Reputation: 3952
Quote:
Originally Posted by Formerly Known As Twenty View Post
It's natural to take one's own experiences and apply them to both hypothetical experiences and the experiences of others. I'm glad that taking the risk of bending one of your personal deal-breakers worked out well for you.

I'm now partnered and slightly bent one of my former deal-breakers for my guy, so life definitely moved onward and upward post-divorce. My former spouse still struggles with his alcohol dependence, which still breaks my heart for him as he's a really decent human being and one of the best men I've ever known; a man of good character and great kindness.

There a very few other deal-breakers that I have/had (one key, set-into-stone one had a natural expiration date), but that particular one must always be held firm as I cannot bear witness to another man who I love self-destruct in such a manner.
Yeah I've seen people kill themselves with substance. It is heartbreaking even when it's not someone not been a relationship with.
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Old 02-28-2021, 08:39 AM
 
Location: Mr. Roger's Neighborhood
4,085 posts, read 2,516,033 times
Reputation: 12484
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hankrigby View Post
Yeah I've seen people kill themselves with substance. It is heartbreaking even when it's not someone not been a relationship with.
I've seen that too. In the last two years, four of my former colleagues have died due to substance abuse either directly or via suicide because the struggle with addiction and the depression that so often goes along with it had become too much.

The owner of my last place of business is much in the same place as my former spouse, so it was often difficult for me to be around him as he was so much like my ex--brilliant, charming, very good at what he did and decent to those who worked for him, but his dependance on alcohol has nearly killed him on several occasions and cost him his marriage.
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Old 02-28-2021, 10:21 AM
 
Location: Stuck on the East Coast, hoping to head West
4,640 posts, read 11,868,327 times
Reputation: 9885
Nope.
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Old 02-28-2021, 11:42 AM
 
9,301 posts, read 8,300,365 times
Reputation: 7328
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThisTown123 View Post
Would it be a deal breaker? What if it was years ago? A one-off?
For me, no. Absolutely not a deal breaker.
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Old 03-01-2021, 12:20 AM
 
Location: San Francisco Bay Area
7,663 posts, read 5,375,177 times
Reputation: 16096
Mugshots should not be available to the public at all unless the person in the mugshot has been CONVICTED, not merely arrested.

I need to get that out of the way to then say that if someone had been convicted of a DUI/DWI, yes, it would be a no-go for me. I have a friend whose mother was killed by a drunk driver while she was walking on the sidewalk, minding her own business. It was horrible.

There are no second chances as far as I am concerned when someone drives drunk.
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