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Yes, you are worth more than that. Imo his rude behavior is a reflection of him. Don't take it personally. If a guy did that to me on a first date I would probably consider it a deal breaker. Unless he had a very good excuse but just randomly pulling out his phone to check texts? No way! Its one thing after you've been dating a bit, but not on the first date, hell no!
You are worth more than that! For some reason you seem willing to explain away behavior like that or think you did something wrong when its really more that you went on a date with a guy that was kind of rude or just is in a weird place himself and not ready to be a good partner.
Just keep talking to guys. You have to kiss a lot of frogs! You will meet dozens and dozens of frogs before the man who you get along with well. Don't get hung up over each first date that isn't great. You will exhaust yourself. Most first dates aren't that great!
Here's the thing. That's more on Mandi than him. She is expecting him value her more than she does.
If she valued herself, she would have deemed it inappropriate, and dumped him.
I'm wasn't there and don't know how rude I would have found his behavior. But Mandi DOES know SHE thought it rude, so the rest is on her.
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Not every person you meet will be into you, and you will not be into every person you meet. You get excited at the slightest bit of interest from a guy, and it is unrealistic, and to be honest a tad immature. You should be cynical and jaded like the rest of us.
I'm joking, try and maintain something in between.
Hahah thanks for making me laugh. I do get a tad too excited. It's only because I rarely ever meet guys I have stuff in common with and connect with. He and I had lots in common, we were both mature, and both in simular places in our lives and his goals were similar to mine.
I meet guys and they drink too much, smoke too much, have instability in their careers, have baggage.
This guy didn't seem to have any of that. He seemed a lot like me.
Yes, you are worth more than that. Imo his rude behavior is a reflection of him. Don't take it personally. If a guy did that to me on a first date I would probably consider it a deal breaker. Unless he had a very good excuse but just randomly pulling out his phone to check texts? No way! Its one thing after you've been dating a bit, but not on the first date, hell no!
You are worth more than that! For some reason you seem willing to explain away behavior like that or think you did something wrong when its really more that you went on a date with a guy that was kind of rude or just is in a weird place himself and not ready to be a good partner.
Just keep talking to guys. You have to kiss a lot of frogs! You will meet dozens and dozens of frogs before the man who you get along with well. Don't get hung up over each first date that isn't great. You will exhaust yourself. Most first dates aren't that great!
Thanks. I just feel like I've kissed so many frogs already and it's still not happening. It gets depressing seeing your friends married and talking children, and I can't even get that second date. He may ask. I think he will next week honestly. And if he doesn't, its his loss.
I think I was cute on the date. We chatted, he teased me a lot. I teased him a little. It was good, other than the weird phone thing. I didn't find it repulsive enough not to see him again, but odd, especially since we were just meeting.
I drive myself crazy. I mine as well have flowers and be picking pedals "he loves me, he loves me not"
I wish I wasn't like this. I told my therapist about this. We're going to talk about it next week. Just sick of wasting my time and feeling like I'm always overlooked.
I am a good catch. I'm turning 30. I'm feeling so defeated.
I questioned from the beginning if he was ready for a relationship because he just got out of one. He also said he didn't want to rush. So we aren't rushing. Maybe I'll see him next week, maybe not.
Thanks. I just feel like I've kissed so many frogs already and it's still not happening. It gets depressing seeing your friends married and talking children, and I can't even get that second date. He may ask. I think he will next week honestly. And if he doesn't, its his loss.
... I'm feeling so defeated.
You've mentioned many times that "everyone" is married and you're not, "everyone" has love and you don't, etc. All-or-nothing thinking. Why must you do whatever you think everyone is doing (by the way, they sure aren't). Is the turning 30 a huge speed bump? Wait a few years and see how loved and happy "everyone" is.
This could be. I just find this cruel I guess. I'm worth getting to know and I'm worth more than some flirty texts. I'm worth more than pulling out your cell phone on a date. I am a really smart, attractive, and fun woman. I'm worth more than being a "plaything"
Maybe he is just seeking attention and an ego boost after his breakup. I'll never know. I'm not holding my breath anymore for him to come around. If he does, I'm open to it. If he doesn't, his loss.
To insinuate he treated you poorly, is over the top, immature and not true. If it makes you feel better to say so, well....
First, he told you he was just coming out of a long term relationship. You WERE warned and decided to ignore that.
He got to know you for a few weeks via text and invited you out. You had a date. People go on dates all the time that end up being nothing. It's not the fault of either person. They just are not a good match. They move on.
You are figuratively stomping your feet and calling him names because his texting has slowed down and he hasn't ask you out again. What's it been 2/3 days?
I've followed your posts, but now I see it all clearly. Based on your overreaction to ONE DATE, I suspect your desperation for a relationship comes through on dates, even if you don't think so. It's not pretty.
Words are fine, but actions are more important. You've "learned" the words to imply you like yourself. Your actions and overreactions say otherwise.
The title of this post is a joke. Of course, you're rushing things.
There is a poster here, I don't recall who, that has recommended you stop dating until you fix yourself. Poster, I now agree with you.
To insinuate he treated you poorly, is over the top, immature and not true. If it makes you feel better to say so, well....
First, he told you he was just coming out of a long term relationship. You WERE warned and decided to ignore that.
He got to know you for a few weeks via text and invited you out. You had a date. People go on dates all the time that end up being nothing. It's not the fault of either person. They just are not a good match. They move on.
You are figuratively stomping your feet and calling him names because his texting has slowed down and he hasn't ask you out again. What's it been 2/3 days?
I've followed your posts, but now I see it all clearly. Based on your overreaction to ONE DATE, I suspect your desperation for a relationship comes through on dates, even if you don't think so. It's not pretty.
Words are fine, but actions are more important. You've "learned" the words to imply you like yourself. Your actions and overreactions say otherwise.
The title of this post is a joke. Of course, you're rushing things.
There is a poster here, I don't recall who, that has recommended you stop dating until you fix yourself. Poster, I now agree with you.
I was actually just sitting back, and I realized that it has only been almost two days since the date. I now I do feel silly. Two days. Two days and he is still texting me every morning. Two days and he has weekend plans ad do I.
Maybe I'm being dumb. I just got so excited to potentially see him again. Two days is nothing. We went out. I enjoyed it. I liked him. So Two days, 4 days, it shouldnt matter. I think we will probably go out again. I really hope so. That's all I can hope. And can't be disappointed. Two days is nothing.
He doesn't want to rush, so I shouldn't either. If I like him, then I have to not rush.
I was actually just sitting back, and I realized that it has only been almost two days since the date. I now I do feel silly. Two days. Two days and he is still texting me every morning. Two days and he has weekend plans ad do I.
Maybe I'm being dumb. I just got so excited to potentially see him again. Two days is nothing. We went out. I enjoyed it. I liked him. So Two days, 4 days, it shouldnt matter. I think we will probably go out again. I really hope so. That's all I can hope. And can't be disappointed. Two days is nothing.
He doesn't want to rush, so I shouldn't either. If I like him, then I have to not rush.
Did either of you say something along the lines of, "hey, I had a really good time with you tonight. Would you like to get together again?"
Most of my successful dates (whether they turned into a relationship or not) pretty much always included a brief exchange like that and, in some cases, plans being made for the next get-together even if we didn't set a definite time.
I don't consider making future-ish plans to be rushing--just an expression of interest in spending more time together because two people enjoy each other's company and hey, dating is fun.
This could be. I just find this cruel I guess. I'm worth getting to know and I'm worth more than some flirty texts. I'm worth more than pulling out your cell phone on a date. I am a really smart, attractive, and fun woman. I'm worth more than being a "plaything.
You say it. But you don't act like it because you don't believe it. You are starving for attention.
Did either of you say something along the lines of, "hey, I had a really good time with you tonight. Would you like to get together again?"
Most of my successful dates (whether they turned into a relationship or not) pretty much always included a brief exchange like that and, in some cases, plans being made for the next get-together even if we didn't set a definite time.
I don't consider making future-ish plans to be rushing--just an expression of interest in spending more time together because two people enjoy each other's company and hey, dating is fun.
We both acknowledged that we had a good time. We joked about "if you play your cards right..." next time etc.... I'll tell you about this or we can kiss more. Cute stuff. He even asked me "how'd I do"?" and again it seemed like positive flirting. A positive experience.
I think I'm getting too hyped up that we don't have plans again. He never gave me any indication that anything was bad or was wrong. He even walked me to my car door and kissed me goodnight. I didn't see it as we were done and I didn't get the vibe that he wasn't interested. I got the vibe that he had a pleasant time with me and all was good.
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