Does anyone else love being in relationships but hates dating with a passion? (women, singles)
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It’s not a gotcha question I legit would like to know your thoughts. Of course Men can be as well so this isn’t just to pick on women.
I always find that the men on dating apps who ask for more pictures, full length body pictures, act suspicious, come right out and ask if I look like my pictures, even though I’ve never used a filter… do not have the same standards for themselves!
Isn’t that funny? As if they can just look like whatever and are always forthcoming in their true selves, but *I* have to prove that’s me?
I get tired of that and say just forget it, meet or don’t. One of them thought me saying I’m not interested in such a suspicious attitude meant they caught me trying to catfish them. If you don’t want to meet me unless I show you a clear picture of my butt in good lighting first, it’s ok! Weeding ‘em out with clues of my own.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChileSauceCritic
For me dating(the searching for, finding and winning over part) is a grueling, heart wrenching, stressful requirement to hopefully eventually enter into the blissful wonderful happy part of the relationship.
I view dating as a necessary evil, the part I enjoy least(meaning not at all). it's why I hate dating past the age of 30 as that part between relationships get's longer and longer, along with the fact that women who are my type get harder and harder to pick out of a crowd because sometime in their late 20's many people stop wearing their uniforms forcing me to have to FIND OUT if we have anything in common as opposed to when I was 19 and all I had to do is look for the girl with purple hair and a MisFits concert shirt or blood red & jet black white girl dreads, cargo shorts, Gwar concert shirt and combat boots(pardon me I was remembering 2 very good nights that started relationships at a dive bar I used to go to between 1988 - 1990).
No matter how many big NOPEs I’ve felt at the end of a date or first meeting, I still enjoy dating more than relationships at this stage of my life. Later in life we get to enjoy experiences and look forward to meeting all kinds of people, whereas in my 20s I thought I was lucky to find “The One” and be done dating.
... so yes you got chosen based solely on mutual attraction and common interests while after 30 not so much. (
I don't see why those shouldn't be the criteria for dating regardless of how old you are. As long as you are not paying her bills, and she is not paying yours, what difference does it make what her job or finances are? I never cared what a woman did for a living. I chose them solely based on mutual attraction. Everyone I have known at all ages felt that way too. After divorcing a US Senator, Elizabeth Taylor married a truck driver.
Dating and a job interview are on about the same level to me. I despise both. Women these days have lists. And they’re not shy about them. When they sit down with you on a date, it becomes very apparent in most situations, that you are indeed being interviewed. Lol
You mean men don't have any criteria for what they are looking for? Any woman will do?
It really depends on whether you're dating looking for a relationship or dating for fun.
I almost never did the former, I've had only two what I consider serious relationships, and both men I married. Still married to the second one.
Dating for fun is, well, fun. As long as both parties don't attach quickly or easily. I never fell in love with anyone except my current husband. That doesn't mean I didn't get my little old heart broke or be disappointed when someone moved on before I was ready.
That's all part of the "game"--shrug, go out with girlfriends, kick up a little bit and move on.
Although I'd never want to relive those years between my marriages I do think of them fondly.
That was then though (late 70s), a very different time.
Utterly thankful I'm not dating now and never will again.
Dating and a job interview are on about the same level to me. I despise both. Women these days have lists. And they’re not shy about them. When they sit down with you on a date, it becomes very apparent in most situations, that you are indeed being interviewed. Lol
It’s like this for women too, at least for me. It’s like a job interview or audition. You only get a few minutes to knock the interviewer’s socks off, and if you don’t, they’re moving on quickly to the next candidate. One guy even said something at the end of the date like “Thanks for coming out here to meet with me” - the way he said it sounded so interview-like - and I knew I would not be moving on to the next phase of interviewing.
It’s like this for women too, at least for me. It’s like a job interview or audition. You only get a few minutes to knock the interviewer’s socks off, and if you don’t, they’re moving on quickly to the next candidate. One guy even said something at the end of the date like “Thanks for coming out here to meet with me” - the way he said it sounded so interview-like - and I knew I would not be moving on to the next phase of interviewing.
That's strange, if I show up and the woman looks like her photos and the stuff she said in her profile is true, she already has the job if she wants it.
That's strange, if I show up and the woman looks like her photos and the stuff she said in her profile is true, she already has the job if she wants it.
Wow! That has never happened for me. Some have even commented that I look like my photos, and remark that they notice I don’t use any filters on my photos. I still don’t get chosen for a position.
I did not. I meant just being yourself around each other, cuddling on the couch, wearing comfy clothes and just enjoying each others company in a very relaxed way.
Wow! That has never happened for me. Some have even commented that I look like my photos, and remark that they notice I don’t use any filters on my photos. I still don’t get chosen for a position.
Then perhaps it may be something about your personality, mannerisms, attitude... something... that's not getting you to the next base.
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