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I was in a state of waking up and my wife asked me why I don't like Terms of Endearment. I told her I like the movie. After I woke up a bit more I asked her why she asked if I liked that movie. She rolled her eyes and said, "I was talking about calling me sweetheart or honey." I of course joked with her that I'd Google "terms of endearment" to see what I could come up with. Fortunately the toilet paper didn't fly across the bathroom at me.
Now if you know me, I've never been one for calling names like honey, sweetie etc. And this was a topic in the beginning of our marriage (10 years ago) I do say darlin' quite a bit to both she and my daughter.
Before I came downstairs to jump on CD I had to get my coffee so I could perk up and ask CD women why this topic is important. I realize it may not be as important for some women as others, but what's the scoop? And what are you called by your spouse or partner?
It comes natural in our marriage. I've never asked my husband to call me anything special, that would be weird.
We have a bunch of terms we call each other. He'll call me Dear, Darlin', Honey, Apple Pie, Pumpkin, Sweetie, and probably 10 others I can't think of right now,
I've been known to call him, Honey, Dear, Pumpkin Pie, Apple Crisp, Sweet Pea, Sweetie, Butter(don't know where that one ever came from), Peanut, and so forth.
I know, it's probably enough to make one gag. We just have a marriage that no one would probably ever understand unless you have known us from the beginning. We've been together for 17 years and married 11 of those years(11 in July)and wouldn't trade any of it for all the money in the world.
I should add that we don't call each other these names every time we say something to each other. Maybe once or twice a day a name pops out, but they've been with us since the beginning.
It was weird that she asked me. I know some of it stems from the fact that her parents called one another names like you mentioned. My parents rarely called one another those types of names. I've tried to call her names, but it just doesn't seem natural.
I have issues with being called something other than my name. I get more than a little bent out of shape when people call me "honey" or "sweetie". The only people that get away with that are seriously older folks. Everyone else better be able to remember my name.
When we were dating, my hubby (who is a self-proclaimed nerd and not particularly good at doing the little romantic things that I wish he would) began calling me Schnookie. Coming out of his mouth, it just seemed so incongruous that it was funny. And pretty sweet. Now, he calls me that all the time (and I also call him Schnookie) and we have to stop ourselves from saying it too loudly in public, though we actually don't care who hears us. Occasionally, our kids call us Schnookie, too, but they know it's a name mommy and daddy call each other.
My very first boyfriend who I fell madly in love with at the age of 16 called me Critter and I loved that too. I don't like it when anybody but somebody I love who loves me calls me an endearing name, but when a loved one does, it makes me happy.
With my fiance I use... darling, sweetheart, baby and honey
He uses with me... precious, sweetheart, my love and baby
We both have also used "my gift from God" to each other in written communication.
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