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05-25-2008, 12:47 AM
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10 posts, read 41,867 times
Reputation: 22
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Met a once in lifetime woman in Febuary. When we met she told me she was separated, no kids, married for 1 year and begining the divorce proceedings. We had a great relationship for two months. We saw alot of each other and hade a great time. One day I did not hear from her despite trying to contact her a few times. She then emailed me a confession stating that the emotional rollercoaster she is experiencing from the divorce is overwhelming and needs a break from our relationship to decide if she can continue with it. I told her that I would respect whatever decision she made and wished her the best. I have not contacted her at all since then and have resigned to never hear from her again. I have opened up to the possibility of new relationships and decided to move on with my life, but she is allways in my heart and mind. Should I make an effort to keep in touch or wait 'til she contacts me if ever?
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05-25-2008, 12:50 AM
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Location: Tucson
42,835 posts, read 85,368,595 times
Reputation: 22814
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ARQUIMEX
Should I make an effort to keep in touch or wait 'til she contacts me if ever?
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Wait. It's a very taxing time for her. |
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05-25-2008, 09:40 AM
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26,659 posts, read 26,416,767 times
Reputation: 45190
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My brother went through some pretty tough times too. Last girlfriend he dated for almost a year turned out to be married...and she finally told him on a Christmas day that she'd been sneaking around behind her husband all that time and things were getting too 'heated up' to risk getting caught. Funny, she told him she'd never been married. They called it quits from there. It really devastated him though because he really thought the world of her. Thank gawd they were never caught because I dont think the gun laws out there in Texas are as strict as anywhere else...and how was he to know (but try explaining that to the husband)! 
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05-25-2008, 10:08 AM
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Location: Sunny Florida
7,136 posts, read 12,184,388 times
Reputation: 9530
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Move on with your life. If she wants to contact you she will. If you know her birthday send her a card to let her know you're thinking of her , If not, wait until Christmas and send a card then if she's still on your mind.
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05-25-2008, 10:34 AM
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Location: In the sunshine on a ship with a plank
3,413 posts, read 8,572,267 times
Reputation: 2257
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I think for your own good you need to move on and let her remain in your past. Someday it won't hurt and you'll look back with fondness and maybe appreciation for her honesty.
But if you hang on- even in a little way, like intending to send a card or reaching out on a specific date, you're not letting it stay in the past and you will therefore be unable to open yourself to a new, healthier, and potentially more successful relationship. That would be unfair to whomever you may meet, but it would also be grossly unfair to you.
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05-25-2008, 10:54 AM
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Location: Wu Dang Mountain
12,941 posts, read 20,973,503 times
Reputation: 8677
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pirate girl
I think for your own good you need to move on and let her remain in your past.
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Totally agree.
Carrying extra baggage around is tiring and distracting, and it's hard to load up on new bags when your arms are already full. 
Learn from the past, live in the present, don't worry about the future. |
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05-25-2008, 12:34 PM
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Location: Tucson
42,835 posts, read 85,368,595 times
Reputation: 22814
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SifuPhil
Totally agree.
Carrying extra baggage around is tiring and distracting, and it's hard to load up on new bags when your arms are already full. |
I disagree in this case. If he's willing to wait some, she may very well come back after she unloads some bags. |
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05-25-2008, 12:42 PM
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Location: Somewhere out there...
3,663 posts, read 8,369,365 times
Reputation: 3744
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ARQUIMEX
Met a once in lifetime woman in Febuary. When we met she told me she was separated, no kids, married for 1 year and begining the divorce proceedings. We had a great relationship for two months. We saw alot of each other and hade a great time. One day I did not hear from her despite trying to contact her a few times. She then emailed me a confession stating that the emotional rollercoaster she is experiencing from the divorce is overwhelming and needs a break from our relationship to decide if she can continue with it. I told her that I would respect whatever decision she made and wished her the best. I have not contacted her at all since then and have resigned to never hear from her again. I have opened up to the possibility of new relationships and decided to move on with my life, but she is allways in my heart and mind. Should I make an effort to keep in touch or wait 'til she contacts me if ever?
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Wait..........she may not be sure if she wants this divorce. |
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05-25-2008, 12:46 PM
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Location: Tucson
42,835 posts, read 85,368,595 times
Reputation: 22814
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Quote:
Originally Posted by asitshouldbe
Wait..........she may not be sure if she wants this divorce.
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You're right. That's a possibility, too. |
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05-25-2008, 02:29 PM
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Location: Wu Dang Mountain
12,941 posts, read 20,973,503 times
Reputation: 8677
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sierraAZ
I disagree in this case. If he's willing to wait some, she may very well come back after she unloads some bags.
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So he should sit in the corner with big puppy-dog eyes and wait...how long? A week? A month? A year? What's the cut-off point in "waiting some"?
What if she NEVER comes back? All that time wasted...
What if, after 3 months, she DOES come back, but she isn't the same person? People change... |
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