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I guess you're right, but I really like him! I think we would complement each other well. I just don't understand why he hasn't taken up the opportunity to spend time together.
How could you not understand , dissenter just explained it. And we all know where spending time together will lead to.
He may be nervous because he senses you really like him and you’re about to ask him out. Unless he’s dropped any hints about getting together socially, then risking the working relationship really isn’t worth it.
He also could be nervous around OP, because he senses trouble she might cause at work.
I guess you're right, but I really like him! I think we would complement each other well. I just don't understand why he hasn't taken up the opportunity to spend time together.
Maybe he doesn't view you the same way you view him.
I work with this guy, and it's pretty clear he likes me. He stares at me when he thinks I'm not looking, and then when I catch him, he looks away. The other day I was sitting next to him in a meeting, and his hands were so sweaty, they left the table wet. He can't look me in the eye. Around other people, he avoids and ignores me, but is nice to me when no one else is around.
He sent me a message on Facebook today about something relevant to our work. I replied and thanked him, and then said I'd love to pick his brain [about the topic we were discussing] sometime. Then I sent another message and said I hoped it didn't sound too weird. He replied and said it didn't sound weird, he was just busy at an event, so hadn't had time to reply.
I don't understand - he's showing signs of interest, but doesn't seem interested in even hanging out outside of work. I'm considering asking him out. Maybe just as friends to begin. I don't want to make things at work awkward.
Should I ask him out? If so, how should I do it? What do you suggest?
Thank you!
I don't see anything where he sounds like he is not interested?
Are you always jumping to conclusions overly fast? Just give it some time to grow and don't rush it.
I work with this guy, and it's pretty clear he likes me. He stares at me when he thinks I'm not looking, and then when I catch him, he looks away. The other day I was sitting next to him in a meeting, and his hands were so sweaty, they left the table wet. He can't look me in the eye. Around other people, he avoids and ignores me, but is nice to me when no one else is around.
He sent me a message on Facebook today about something relevant to our work. I replied and thanked him, and then said I'd love to pick his brain [about the topic we were discussing] sometime. Then I sent another message and said I hoped it didn't sound too weird. He replied and said it didn't sound weird, he was just busy at an event, so hadn't had time to reply.
I don't understand - he's showing signs of interest, but doesn't seem interested in even hanging out outside of work. I'm considering asking him out. Maybe just as friends to begin. I don't want to make things at work awkward.
Should I ask him out? If so, how should I do it? What do you suggest?
Thank you!
Was this the only time you dropped a hint/left the door open for him to set something up, or have there been other occasions? If this is the only time so far, I'd say you're drawing conclusions prematurely, that he's not interested in hanging out outside of work. 1 incident doesn't constitute a pattern.
Give it time. What's the rush? Why not ask him if he can recommend any good places to have lunch in the area?
One thing we're not seeing in your posts so far, though, is why you like him. What qualities has he displayed (besides nervousness around you) that attract you to him? Do you have any info or observations to go on, that would indicate that starting something with this guy would actually have a good chance at success, rather than crashing and burning, which would lead to major awkwardness in the office forever afterwards?
People have started a dateship or relationship with the object of their interest at work just because they're "cute" or seem nice, only to find out later, that there are major character flaws or psychological/emotional issues down the road. After the situationship blows up, working with that person can suddenly become intolerable.
Do you know if your employer has a policy about fraternizing with office-mates outside of work? Some employers don't allow it, and for good reason. They don't want productivity adversely affected by personal dramas between their workers.
Last edited by Ruth4Truth; 09-20-2022 at 10:23 AM..
I work with this guy, and it's pretty clear he likes me. He stares at me when he thinks I'm not looking, and then when I catch him, he looks away. The other day I was sitting next to him in a meeting, and his hands were so sweaty, they left the table wet. He can't look me in the eye. Around other people, he avoids and ignores me, but is nice to me when no one else is around.
He sent me a message on Facebook today about something relevant to our work. I replied and thanked him, and then said I'd love to pick his brain [about the topic we were discussing] sometime. Then I sent another message and said I hoped it didn't sound too weird. He replied and said it didn't sound weird, he was just busy at an event, so hadn't had time to reply.
I don't understand - he's showing signs of interest, but doesn't seem interested in even hanging out outside of work. I'm considering asking him out. Maybe just as friends to begin. I don't want to make things at work awkward.
Should I ask him out? If so, how should I do it? What do you suggest?
Thank you!
You sort of already did........ you through it out there and he didn't jump on it. Don't pursue this wait and see if he takes your bait. Paitence Grasshopper..........
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