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Men making over 250k represent less than 1% of the population. So, I doubt the OP question is directed solely at that group.
That poster spoke for an entire group of people and he's most likely not one of them.
The internet brainwashes stereotypes into the minds of people and it allows them to validate their own biases.
Granted the OPs question is quite sweeping. She can only get opinions from the over forty men if her issue is important to them individually, and this is just one web forum. If the question were asked on a men's forum they would skewer her because the men who hang out there often have negative views of women and take every opportunity to put them down.
Not at all……so many other things are much more important post 40.
What is so magical about the age of 40? Do most men reach a new level of enlightenment where carnal desire all of a sudden becomes subordinate to other qualities in a person compared to when they were 39?
Or is it the case that the 40+ man who doesn't care much about a tight body never really cared much about that at any point in his life?
I dont know, because I’m a woman, but it seems to me that those toned to perfection women would be like sleeping with a board. Also, there are plenty of men married to fat women.
Another thing is that New York is a competitive market for practically everything whether it be an open spot in the grass at Central Park on a sunny day or a reservation at a semi-popular restaurant south of Cathedral. If OP lives in New York, then she should know that the ordinary rules don't apply, which means that a tight body is going to be important to men since NYC is stacked full of Type As who have had access to the best of practically everything and expect no different when it comes to a spouse or significant other. This is especially true for the transplant crowd, but maybe less so for the natives occupying the farther reaches of the outer boroughs. I'd imagine dating on Staten Island is a different experience than dating between Battery Park and 110th.
New York is a notoriously difficult place to find love, which is why many people only stay for a few years and then move to "greener" pastures.
What is so magical about the age of 40? Do most men reach a new level of enlightenment where carnal desire all of a sudden becomes subordinate to other qualities in a person compared to when they were 39?
Or is it the case that the 40+ man who doesn't care much about a tight body never really cared much about that at any point in his life?
Nothing magical about 40 I guess, we all mature at different rates. And the question has nothing to do with sex drive, that part of biology hasn’t changed. Guys can be happy with sex with many types of women.
For example, when I was 20, I didn’t care about what kind of career a woman had, what education level she had, what had she accomplished, was she a kind person, what were her life goals, was she OK with money, what are her hobbies, what is she passionate about, etc.
When you are 20, it is almost just a biology qualification.
I dont know, because I’m a woman, but it seems to me that those toned to perfection women would be like sleeping with a board. Also, there are plenty of men married to fat women.
Some by choice, others not. Just because a man marries a bigger woman doesn't mean that was his preference. It's also the case that in a lot of cases the woman wasn't bigger when they first got together. So I'm not sure how much can actually be inferred from that observation.
For example, when I was 20, I didn’t care about what kind of career a woman had, what education level she had, what had she accomplished, was she a kind person, what were her life goals, was she OK with money, what are her hobbies, what is she passionate about, etc.
To be honest with you, I think that probably made you exceptional as a 20-year old because even 20-year old guys want girlfriends who are more than just an empty head. Sleeping around is a different story, which is why you get threads about women having chemistry and great sex with men only for those men to suddenly pull away.
I mean, if you think about it, the median age of first marriage for men in the U.S. is in around 30. These men probably met their wives in their early to mid 20s. So I'm not really sure it's the case that the average 20-something man is a complete slave to his libido just chasing around any and every shiny object that catches his eye. There's a very large chunk of young men who have enough maturity to at least take a stab at a long-term commitment.
If anything, I would say it's the older guys who have never been married who have the highest physical standards, which is why they've probably never been married, and this could be especially true if they are highly successful. These are often the guys who feel like they were ignored or didn't get the women they wanted in their 20s, and now that they've achieved "success," they will settle for nothing less than a proper reward that reflects that success.
To be honest with you, I think that probably made you exceptional as a 20-year old because even 20-year old guys want girlfriends who are more than just an empty head. Sleeping around is a different story, which is why you get threads about women having chemistry and great sex with men only for those men to suddenly pull away.
I mean, if you think about it, the median age of first marriage for men in the U.S. is in around 30. These men probably met their wives in their early to mid 20s. So I'm not really sure it's the case that the average 20-something man is a complete slave to his libido just chasing around any and every shiny object that catches his eye. There's a very large chunk of young men who have enough maturity to at least take a stab at a long-term commitment.
If anything, I would say it's the older guys who have never been married who have the highest physical standards, which is why they've probably never been married, and this could be especially true if they are highly successful. These are often the guys who feel like they were ignored or didn't get the women they wanted in their 20s, and now that they've achieved "success," they will settle for nothing less than a proper reward that reflects that success.
I agree. A man who thinks with his big head is going to look for a woman who uses her head.
That last line, though. Most women I know have the self-esteem not to be seen as a "reward." We're people, not prizes, something that guys like that most likely miss from the get-go. Guys like that don't see women as people to begin with, and most of us can smell objectification a mile away these days.
What is so magical about the age of 40? Do most men reach a new level of enlightenment where carnal desire all of a sudden becomes subordinate to other qualities in a person compared to when they were 39?
Or is it the case that the 40+ man who doesn't care much about a tight body never really cared much about that at any point in his life?
Sort of. There is a thing called hedonic adaptation. If you look at people who win the lottery and people who become quadreplegics, after three years they are about as happy as they were before their sudden good or bad fortune. The good things that happen to us, we start taking for granted and they no longer bring us such joy.This is the reason after you get a new car, the thrill kind of goes away after a while. But our happiness resets after really bad news as well. We accept the situation and start to move forward with our lives. Your first break up that seemed like such a big deal at the time, you might no longer care about her at all anymore.
I have 4 older brothers. When I was in my 20's my older brothers went to see a local band and raved about how hot the lead singer was and I remember thinking this woman is 30, she was just way too old. I remember in my 30's just really not being excited about women in their 40's and now that I am in my 40's these same women look great. As we get older it is not that younger women stop looking good, but the universe of women that looks good gets a lot bigger as we get older because our standards have dropped and it is a great thing.
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