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Thank you EVERYONE who responded to my post. I genuinely appreciate everything, even the parts that were hard to hear. It was all incredibly helpful. I DO think ya'll are right in all the different ways you've said it, and I think I've known all along, I just really wanted to do my best and give my all before making any decisions. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your time everyone!
You said you wanted to, "give it your all before making any decisions". You shouldn't have to. He's NOT. Being willing to drive 4 HOURS to see some dog (his ludicrous excuse to actually see HER) doesn't look like a man who truly LOVES his CURRENT woman who wants to make her feel loved, supported, respected, valued, & like a queen...which ALL men should be w/ their women.
That's another thing. Why are (mostly) women trying so hard, trying to save/keep their lousy, going downhill (since 1, 2,3+ years ago) relationships when the men obviously aren't trying hard & not giving it their all? They're just doing what they want, living their lives...whatever wrongdoing that is.
Women will dangle by a thread, give 1 millino chances, look the other way, give 1 million excuses for him, hang around 5, 10, 15+ years, etc., wasting their lives while the men are just doing their thing so non-chalantly w/o a thought.
I HATE when one person's trying so hard when they know it's not good.
Will you (& others in similar situations) just dump his ____ already!
Quote:
Originally Posted by oh-eve
Could you please let us know what you ended up doing and how it turned out?
Be glad you don't live with him. Just pack his shizit one day when he's with her, put it on his front stoop, and block him everywhere.
Seriously. There is no talking through this. The longer you put up with it the longer he sees you as a rug to walk on, because he has absolutely no respect for you.
Be glad you don't live with him. Just pack his shizit one day when he's with her, put it on his front stoop, and block him everywhere.
Seriously. There is no talking through this. The longer you put up with it the longer he sees you as a rug to walk on, because he has absolutely no respect for you.
Start packing his crap right now.
Quote:
Originally Posted by e-twist
clevergirl is being clever with this one. Listen to her
Probably the dog traveler did his poor me act, or pouted or denied denied or gaslit and op has been dealing with a brick wall. Sometimes when confronted and all the other tactics don’t work they throw on
“charm”/ good behavior or deflection- “ geez I thought everything was good, why you tryin to ruin it”, but it’s a temporary thing.
If they don’t care about losing the relationship they may snarl and accuse and blow up. Just when you thought well eff him, they come back with false contrition— if there’s something they want to preserve.
They aren’t sorry, they regret being busted and forced to change in any way for the likes of you.
But these crumbs aren’t enough. It’s not a new leaf. It’s just a set of toxic behaviors that keep you off center. It’s a not a close committed peaceful relationship where you feel valued 100%.
You cannot build on this house of cards. At best he’s immature. That’s his problem, not yours.
One day he'll probably relieve his guilt and admit they were sleeping together. I get that dogs are important but this is absurd.
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Thank you everyone!
