Still thinking of her 20 years later... (2014, interested, pictures, honest)

[twinsoul]

Originally Posted by reed067

Let her go I carried a torch for a lost love for 20 years myself all it did was make my life & my relationships harder. Yes, it does hurt I even looked the girl I was crazy about up & we took off from where we left off. Sadly she wasn't the same person you need to find a way to get over her. I still think of her from time to time but not in the way that I used too. Sooner or later if she hasn't already your wife will pick up on it. This can only hurt your marriage worse I sense that you don't want that. Maybe you need to talk to someone about this if you can't move past it on your own.

he posted this in 2008 so your a bit late to give him advice and the situation he's in goes FAR beyond getting over someone from his past.

[reed067]

Originally Posted by twinsoul

he posted this in 2008 so your a bit late to give him advice and the situation he's in goes FAR beyond getting over someone from his past.

Yeah I saw that after I posted it.

[Chowhound]

This is a horseshyt post... I remember it a few yrs ago..... bunch of friggin nonsense......

[kimbo28]

Originally Posted by reed067

Yeah I saw that after I posted it.

You also got told the same thing last year when you posted and it was 3 years after the fact.

[imcurious]

This is common with "first love." It is idealized. The first sexual experiences (or the first meaningful sexual experience is powerful). Many people mistakenly conclude that strong physical love = true love or soul mates, when really it is just strong physical attraction, which has a biological impetus.

Now I know that real "love" would be meshing with someone on all levels: Spiritually, emotionally, intellectually, physically - and compatibility and values are also key.

There must be something sorely lacking in your "now" life to cause you to try to go back to the past.

It is a real mistake. The past is gone and pining for it is wasted time.

It sounds like you are real romantic.

I would look up "Four on the Enneagram" because what you're describing is the classic "Four" sin . . . which is lust for the "one that got away."

It is a fallacy - another person cannot complete you - but I doubt any Four could be convinced of that.

[arleigh]

I know the feeling of love lost long ago .
Time does not heal that wound . especially when one reopens the wound and fantasy kicks in . Should a, could a, would a.
sorry I can't do this ...........

[CaptainJack87]

Originally Posted by twinsoul

In a twin soul relationship often 1 or both "run" once they initally meet. The connection is just too intense that if both of their halves aren't completley grounded and "ready" for reunion than they'll just run from the situation. Often times after the intial contact you'll find long periods of time before they reconnect. 10, 20yrs isn't uncommon espeically when 1 or both are aware the other half is married. One of the key attributes of a twin soul relationship is that one won't interfere in the happiness of their twin if they know they are married. Would explain why he never contacted her and vice versa. Just wanted to put that concept out there. 99% of the time this won't be the case but if someone has indeed met their twin and aren't aware of this type of relationship they'll be going through a lot of pain that could easily be eased with a little reading.

mmm I don't know dude. I know this is your name and everything, but I'm skeptical.

[Ulysses61]

Well, even if it is 4 years old, it's one of the most eloquent, heartfelt and beautifully written posts here. I disagree with Chow that it was invented or BS. I believe every word of it. I wonder if Tyler ever contacted Sarah!?

[reed067]

Originally Posted by kimbo28

You also got told the same thing last year when you posted and it was 3 years after the fact.

Ok I got it I need to read the date of the post... I seem to be on everyone's Sht list of late.

[Altekake]

I'm in the same boat as Tyler, but the girl who haunts my dreams and is the closest thing to a soulmate I've ever had walked out of my life 40 years ago when we both graduated from college. She moved in with a guy from back home to whom she became secretly engaged while I was falling more in love with her every day while attending my senior year classes, thinking we were best friends. Since then we've remained good, but casual, friends, talking on the phone from time to time (always me initiating the contact, except during the time I was single after my first wife passed away). Before I got remarried, I saw her several times when business took me to her part of the country (she lives on the East Coast and I live on the West) and each time I felt the same happiness and contentment I had felt at the outset of our relationship. Each of these visits only served to convince me that we were destined to be together (which is something I feel to this day). I also invited her to my town for a big football game and after much cajoling on my part, she flew out and we spent the next 2 days enjoying each other's company. She even met my 3 kids. On the last day of her visit, while I was trying in my own inept way to tell her how I feel about her, she kept repeating that there was no way it would work, and then, out of the blue in order to emphasize her point she exclaimed that she had been raped (I think by her fiancé from college). I haven't seen her since that night. A couple of years later I remarried and my wife and I eventually were blessed with two sons of our own to add to the 3 I had had with my first wife. However, every year since then I have made a point of sending my soul mate a birthday card or leaving a "Happy Birthday" message on her answering machine. A few times I have been lucky enough to catch her at home and we have engaged in the witty repartee I enjoy so much in her. Once it appeared I would have to make another trip to her part of the country and I called to see if I could take her out for dinner while I was there, but she indicated she didn't think that would be appropriate. In any event, my proposed trip never materialized so I didn't have to deal with the conflict that would have created inside me. She has never married and she has just turned 65. She lives temporarily in her mother's home and is her elderly mother's primary caregiver. While I wouldn't trade in my wife for another, we are definitely not soul mates and we do, from time to time, have our rough patches. Every time that happens, I immediately begin dreaming of the dream girl I have never been able to leave behind. I simply love her too much to completely erase her from my life.