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I love him but I hate him too. We're not engaged any more just taking it one step at a time. I just can't find the strength to get rid of him.
You find the strength by having confidence in yourself that you are worth much better. Its not like this is the only guy on the face of the entire earth who will go out with you -- and even if it was, why would you do that to yourse
Just erase his number from your phone, your email lists, your IM chat, facebook, myspace, etc. block his email from all these places. Change your phone number.
Try volunteering places - perhaps a soup kitchen, doing trail work, cleaning up city/state/national parks, volunteer at a women's center.
Go out with girlfriends, go to the gym, start running, make yourself busy and involved.
I love him but I hate him too. We're not engaged any more just taking it one step at a time. I just can't find the strength to get rid of him.
You have to figure out what's best for YOU. It may or may not be him, and you have to be ready to face that. You'll get stronger by not being dependent upon someone else for your happiness. Even if you stay with him, you have to be strong enough to KNOW and DEMAND that it not happen again.
He took her to a family occassion and then to a celebration instead of you. Sounds to me like unbeknown to you you were(or are) the other woman. He's telling her one thing and you another. He wants his cake and eat it to. Dump him or you will be hurt even more. He's not worth you love or respect. You deserve better than this heel.
After a long two months, and soul-searching, he and I are going to try again. But my problem is the events coming up that I have to face that I don't know if I can.
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That's a mistake right there. For six months, this guy was making a fool out of you. Look in the mirror and say that to yourself and then say, "But that's okay..." If you can do that without any anger, disgust, hurt, etc., then you must be made of a stronger fiber than I.
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Originally Posted by eyeofthestorm
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It's just not fair. So much has been taken away from me, and now it feels like I have to start all over again.
Life rarely is. And there is nothing wrong with starting over with someone new who respects you.
Your question: Where do I go from here? Answer: Anywhere where he is not.
Wow..I understand your pain..been there done that. I guess my concern is, this woman thought she was the "MAIN GIRL"..this wasnt just some fling..he actually had a RELATIONSHIP with her.
I don't believe in the saying "once a cheater, always a cheater"..but this woman referred to you as the "EX"..when in reality, you were frigin Engaged???? WTF?? Oh hell no!! This is not good...
Its a no brainer. If it was a one night stand, I could understand you giving him another chance, but this person intentionally let you down in a horrible way. He knew what he was doing and that is what is unforgivable.
Don't even consider marrying him. Kick him to the kurb and go on to better things.
I agree that it is time to move on. Anyone would deserve better than that. That just shows his character and you should be thankful you are not married already to him. Just think if you had children with him and he did this. A steady relationship is the time to check out what kind of marriage you would have..you know now, and it is time to throw this one back and try again. You want the "whole" package that is right for you and your future. Dont' settle...there are nice trustworthy people out there--go and find a KEEPER
Why would you want to go back to a man, that obviously has no respect for you. That would drag your love and heart through such hardship and pain and expect it to be the way it was?
Have you no self reliance? can you not make it on your own? must you settle for a man that cant be a man?
Are you so needing a man in your life that your willing to take a man back that all but lived a second life with someone else other then you, behind yoru back?
Are you willing to settle for a life with a man, that you will always be wondering about, the minute he walks out that door?
I am sorry, BUT Your DATING this guy for god sake!!!! your not married to him- you dont owe him anything., you have no obligation to him.. Move on and wait for the right man to come along---- THE MAN-- that will cherish, adore and share his life with you. They are out there ya know..
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