U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Covid-19 Information Page
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 08-08-2008, 06:13 PM
 
Location: Columbus, OH
381 posts, read 554,189 times
Reputation: 525

Advertisements

I graduated from college over a year ago. I'm 23 and I do notice a kind of social stigma about being single. I think it is almost expected at most work events (like the yearly Christmas party) that you will show up with a mate. If you don't, you're the odd man out and people (men and women) start to question you.

At this point in life, I am focusing more on getting situated and financially job and trying to advance.

There is a girl I work with who just started that I am interested in getting to know better. But, I've found that work is also not the best place to start a relationship.

I'm damned one way or the other.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 08-08-2008, 06:55 PM
 
9,912 posts, read 12,923,099 times
Reputation: 7326
Quote:
Originally Posted by bby07 View Post
Why are people who aren't married by the time they're 30 considered gay or people tell them they're going to be lonely later on in life. I know most people are married with babies when they're 30 maybe this has something to do with it, if we do what everybody else does were considered normal or something. This seems like something that everyone would have believed in the 1950s but it's still going on today, and even the women on Sex and the City got married at the end of the show. I heard that Paula Deen's son was gay because he's in his late 30s and he is still single and not a father yet.

But the real question I'm asking is are we supposed to end up married with babies and a job and a home to call our own? And why are people considered gay if they're not married by a certain age?
OMG!!!!!!

I'm GAY????????????? (Not that there's anything wrong with that! )
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-08-2008, 07:40 PM
 
Location: Jersey in da Citi!!
874 posts, read 3,488,588 times
Reputation: 473
Quote:
Originally Posted by bby07 View Post
Why are people who aren't married by the time they're 30 considered gay or people tell them they're going to be lonely later on in life. I know most people are married with babies when they're 30 maybe this has something to do with it, if we do what everybody else does were considered normal or something. This seems like something that everyone would have believed in the 1950s but it's still going on today, and even the women on Sex and the City got married at the end of the show. I heard that Paula Deen's son was gay because he's in his late 30s and he is still single and not a father yet.

But the real question I'm asking is are we supposed to end up married with babies and a job and a home to call our own? And why are people considered gay if they're not married by a certain age?
This post doesnt really pertain to me..but I think anyone who makes a statement like that..its just plain ignorant.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-08-2008, 08:43 PM
 
Location: St. Joseph Area
6,236 posts, read 8,818,727 times
Reputation: 3122
Quote:
Gay men are notorious for not wanting to be committed in relationships with anyone....another reason is because it is strange for a straight man not to committ to a woman by the age of 30. So he either is GAY, closet gay, closet bisexual, narcissistic, or cannot find a good partner (I've heard horror stories about abusive women).
I'd say it's atypical for men not to commit before thirty, but it's not weird. And I hardly assume that single, never married men are gay and/or selfish. It'd be none of my business anyway. I'd rather marry the right woman later in life than rush into it because I don't want people to get the wrong idea.

Unfortunately, however, there is that stigma against being single and never married, and it's just stupid. Just goes to show you how society expects conformity, and when you don't conform you get judged and treated as something you're not.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-08-2008, 11:06 PM
 
126 posts, read 241,816 times
Reputation: 156
Stop and look at some of the people you know who are in lousy marriages or have had multiple marriages. I fully believe that these are people who should have waited to get married or perhaps never gotten married.

Fact: Marriage and parenthood is not for everyone. Most people consider a person unfulfilled and incomplete without a mate and children. They are wrong. They are projecting onto others their own values. It is quite possible to be single and childless and have a fulfilling, happy life.

I believe that a great number of people can't deal with singles. I think many are secretly envious of the freedom. And I think it threatens them, especially if they themselves are single because it takes more people out of the market.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-08-2008, 11:20 PM
 
Location: Upland, CA
3,875 posts, read 6,997,724 times
Reputation: 4522
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2mares View Post
Because misery loves company.

Yep
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-09-2008, 12:04 AM
 
Location: Southern California
15,084 posts, read 18,610,726 times
Reputation: 10321
Not married by 30 = gay? That's an unusual and archaic mindset...what next? Don't trust anyone over 30?

~Mike (over 30, not married, not gay, and can be trusted for the most part)
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-09-2008, 12:46 AM
 
389 posts, read 1,894,657 times
Reputation: 185
im in my 30s im single since birth because:

i dont go out. im LITERALLY a hermit.

before: house-school-house
now: house-work-house

guys that do have interest in me and ask me out are not my type or i dont see the potential. i did dated a few but i just dont see myself being happy with them. i have to REALLY like you or else i will get bored easily thus, u wont be happy with me. ever.

my family thinks im gay. i think im gay. why the F will i not date women? oh yeah. im fugly.

im terribly shy.

i dont trust people. guys that ask me out. i ALWAYS think they just want sex or they would rape me or kill me. ya im THAT morbid.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-09-2008, 03:16 AM
 
Location: CITY OF ANGELS AND CONSTANT DANGER
5,409 posts, read 11,758,927 times
Reputation: 2253
i never thought people who aint married by 30 weregay.

40 maybe.

seriously tho, i dont think it matters.

some people never get married but keep the same(opposite sex) partner for years.

its a very personal decision that is not contingent on what other people think. at least it wasnt or isnt for me.

its about finding the right person.
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 08-09-2008, 07:00 AM
 
Location: Texas
2,390 posts, read 6,506,760 times
Reputation: 1718
Quote:
Originally Posted by LBSer View Post
im in my 30s im single since birth because:

i dont go out. im LITERALLY a hermit.

before: house-school-house
now: house-work-house

guys that do have interest in me and ask me out are not my type or i dont see the potential. i did dated a few but i just dont see myself being happy with them. i have to REALLY like you or else i will get bored easily thus, u wont be happy with me. ever.

my family thinks im gay. i think im gay. why the F will i not date women? oh yeah. im fugly.

im terribly shy.

i dont trust people. guys that ask me out. i ALWAYS think they just want sex or they would rape me or kill me. ya im THAT morbid.
Not condemning you for your ways.. but from the sounds of it.. you could use a little ego boost.. I think you could use a little counseling to help you with your low self esteem. To call yourself fugly is just not right... no one should think of themselves like that...
Rate this post positively Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2021, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top