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I avoid all those complications because I've kept my maiden name. Both my husband and I are artists so it made sense for us to keep our artistic identities seperate. Plus I don't really understand why it's the woman who has to change her name after marriage. It seems such an outdated and sexist practice to me.
I avoid all those complications because I've kept my maiden name. Both my husband and I are artists so it made sense for us to keep our artistic identities seperate. Plus I don't really understand why it's the woman who has to change her name after marriage. It seems such an outdated and sexist practice to me.
I 100% agree with your comment. Why would I give up the name I was given at birth because I'm getting married??
I avoid all those complications because I've kept my maiden name. Both my husband and I are artists so it made sense for us to keep our artistic identities seperate. Plus I don't really understand why it's the woman who has to change her name after marriage. It seems such an outdated and sexist practice to me.
sexist? no...Yuo got your maiden name (well most) from their father and he got his from his father.
I sign all contracts (and my tax forms) with my legal name. My business is incorporated, so the name looks like this: Jane Smith, Ph.D., P.C. (Professional Corporation). I haven't run into any problems.
I have a business checking account for Jane Smith, Ph.D., P.C. (the corporation) and a personal checking account for Jane Smith Jones (not my real name, but you get the picture). Transferring $ back and forth has not been any more of a problem than if my business was named Counseling Resources (I'm a psychologist) or any other name. Establishing a relationship with and knowing the people at my bank branch also helps if any issues crop up.
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I kept my married name after divorce for several reasons. First, and most importantly, I was married longer than I ever had my maiden name. Second, my married name is such an easy name, easy to spell and rarely confused. Most importantly, it is the last name of our two children..even when I remarry, I will retain that name. My fiancee couldnt care less if I take his name or not, What is the big deal?? It has nothing to do with sexism, feminism etc. I call it convenience.
I kept my married name after divorce for several reasons. First, and most importantly, I was married longer than I ever had my maiden name. Second, my married name is such an easy name, easy to spell and rarely confused. Most importantly, it is the last name of our two children..even when I remarry, I will retain that name. My fiancee couldnt care less if I take his name or not, What is the big deal?? It has nothing to do with sexism, feminism etc. I call it convenience.
sounds reasonable. Not to get personal, cause its not my business. But like in general, if you divorce, you "don't want break all ties" with your ex-hubby right?
or you stillconected regardless, cause you have children together?
Having the same name as your kids just makes it easier overall. Less questions, less assumption that it's not your kid, just easier. I know because my youngest has his father's last name and now that we are divorced, he is the only one out of the 3 of us with that last name.
My mom changed her name when she married my father, and he also adopted my brother when my brother was a baby (they met when he was tiny)... so after the divorce she kept my dad's name for the simplicity of us all having the same last name. I think it happens now as a carryover from previous times, when it was a bigger deal socially to have a different last name from your children. I'm not sure why it was a big deal... maybe due to the stigma of being divorced. It was an issue for my mom in the 70's to be a divorcee... having gone back to her maiden name would have made it even more so, I assume.
I didn't change my name when I married because it would have caused me to have a rhyming name and it would have been ridiculous and I didn't want a silly sounding name! He didn't care one way or the other. So my firstborn son (not the bio child of my ex husband) and I had my name, then my husband and our youngest had his name. It was an even split at least.
The problem was everyone else. Everyone except my own mom and brother "assumed" I changed my name and began referring to me as such. My own father even wrote out his will that way, with my husband's surname as mine, instead of my maiden which I kept. This caused me problems later on, because what he left as for inheritance was oil royalties and the checks would come made out to me with my husband's surname. It was a huge pain to fix, because the oil company paying out the royalties kept wanting "proof of name change" to fix the name on the checks and it was like asking me to prove a negative... since *I* had never changed my name, my father had just done it for me! Every time the ownership changed hands (the company managing the royalties) I'd have to explain all over again and this happened usually 3 or 4x a year. It was easier at first when I was using a bank I'd been banking with since high school (local credit union) who "knew" me and would accept the checks since my husband was on the account too and so they recognized the surname, but later one when I changed banks and we split up, it got worse and when I finally sold my mineral rights.. ugh. What a nightmare!
My ex mother in law didn't like it either, the fact that I had not changed my name, and any time she sent anything to us she would put my name with my husband's. We even had a mail carrier refuse to deliver to me since it wasn't "my" name, the name on record for the address, and when she sent a check for my birthday I had all kinds of heck trying to cash it. I asked her over and over to please not do this and she would always "forget" and do it anyway. I think it was just passive-aggressive crap knowing her, since she was always offended that I didn't take her son's last name as my own. Really, no one was expecting HER to have a rhyming name!
Think "Cole Dole" or "Jenny Penny" or "Judy Moody"... could she really blame me?!
Funny though, as soon as we split up (actually as soon as her son moved out) she stopped "forgetting" and has used my maiden name ever since. LOL.
Be careful if you hyphenate your maiden and married names. My sister was in an auto accident a few years back, not her fault and when the police report showed up at the DMV an arrogant clerk "determined" that the State of Georgia did not recognize hyphenated names and that her drivers license was fraudulant. SHe went through nine kinds of heck trying to prove that it wasn't fraudulant, cost several thousand dollars and then the new 'manager" said it was a mistake. But the computer at the DMV shows her as Jane Brown Black not Brown-Black, like Brown is her middle name. She'd been hyphenated for over 15 years, several license renewals too! Found out during the legal battle that this clerk had done this with many licenses. He was an older gentleman who believed the woman should take the husbands name, no matter what. He retired during this battle. Old fogey!
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name change
