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No the adult thing to do is get along for the sake of your kids. I fnd it hard to believe that people who once liked each other enough to make babies together can't manage to get along so they can raise them. IMO, that's pretty childish behavior to make your kids miserable because you're not happy with the situation you CHOSE. Kids don't get a choice. You chose their other parent.
It's not adult to cheat of booze or abuse. There's no excuse for those things. I've maintained all along that you get yourself into a safe situation first. However, most divorces aren't for reasons of abuse. They're because someone got bored and is unhappy with the partner they chose. They are the ones who should suck it up and act like an adult for their kids' sake.
I'm not happy so I"ll make everyone around me miserable is very childish.
Holy Hell!!! Someone on here has there crap straight!!! Two thumbs up Ivory!
People are so f'n wrapped up in make'n themselves happy they ignore the kids. This site is also so filled w/divorce mongers that it is pathetic.
Two adults can talk and work it out enough to get the kids raised w/out any "noise". But then again, are we really talk'n about adults?
Physical and verbal abuse are one thing, but if you just don't want to be married anymore is another.
I've said it before, and I'll say it again.........don't f'up your kids life!
Yankeegirl, don't take advise from an ex, eh? Your bright enough to know that.
I guess this brings me to think about my ex and the household he grew up in. He said that even though his parents stayed together for them (two kids) they both knew that their relationship was not right.
He said they grew up in a home with both parents, but it wasn`t pleasant.
There was alot of distance between them, and I remember him saying it was "cold."
Exactly.
My parents have never been affectionate with each other, generally argue with each other over money, and since my dad is basically a jerk, my bro and I always sided with my mom. I have virtually no relationship with my dad at all. My brother and I are pretty close, but I don't think either one of us talk to our parents about much. I know I don't. I'd probably have to be in the hospital dying before I would call on them to help me.
"Staying together for the kids" may be "the adult thing to do" but kids are a lot smarter than you think. plus, you also have to think about what kids will end up thinking about relationships thanks to their parents' actions. I for one would rather cut my ear off than get married thanks to my childhood.
I'm not happy so I"ll make everyone around me miserable is very childish.
You have a very warped opinion of what makes people and children miserable. Being a single parent and the child of a single parent hardly equals misery. It may equal a different financial status, but that doesn't have to equal misery. Staying in a loveless marriage for what most would say are immature or misguided reasons causes misery. I think if one does this and feels their life is great, then more power to them. I doubt in 20 years they'll look back and feel this way. A marriage is to be a place of joy, happiness, and fulfillment.... not a hotel for mom or dad. JMO
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Your bright enough to know that.
