Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
well i wonder. some people say that is codependency.
they have great 12 step programs for it.
but you might check with a counselor to see what he says 1st.
well i wonder. some people say that is codependency.
they have great 12 step programs for it.
but you might check with a counselor to see what he says 1st.
You think doing for others is codependent? I have not read up on it in so long I can't remember.
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 20,004,411 times
Reputation: 9418
Quote:
Originally Posted by mrstewart
That is a great way to look it...that will help a lot. Thank you!
I'm glad. That's what I tried to say in my first post but I realized it might need to be reworded. I know this is difficult, having gone through it. It feels good to let it go once you see what joy it brings to those who want to do for you too.
I guess it depends on what it is that the other person is doing for me. I'm usually the one doing things for other people and I feel like I might be inconveniencing someone if they do stuff for me. I moved into a new (to me) house a couple months ago and a family friend in town has offered to come over and help fix a few things, paint, change locks, etc. but so far I haven't called to ask him to come over. I hate asking people for favors - I feel guilty or something. I don't like asking for rides to the airport, but I'd be happy to take time off work, using vacation hours, if a friend needed a ride and I wouldn't think twice about it.
I think I should change my way of thinking, but don't really know how to.
I guess it depends on what it is that the other person is doing for me. I'm usually the one doing things for other people and I feel like I might be inconveniencing someone if they do stuff for me. I moved into a new (to me) house a couple months ago and a family friend in town has offered to come over and help fix a few things, paint, change locks, etc. but so far I haven't called to ask him to come over. I hate asking people for favors - I feel guilty or something. I don't like asking for rides to the airport, but I'd be happy to take time off work, using vacation hours, if a friend needed a ride and I wouldn't think twice about it.
I think I should change my way of thinking, but don't really know how to.
That is me to the minute details!!
I am happy to do anything for anyone but if I need something I always feel like I am bothering them...
Let's make a pact...we'll change our way of thinking...somehow!
Just try to think of it this way if it helps; when you deny someone the joy of giving to you/doing for you, you're taking from them.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
