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Well in this day and age marriages are not lasting long. So lets say he had $3.5 million in real estate and another $4.3 million in cash and investments before you met and got married. This is not a lot but it's enough to protect.
Now let's say the 2 of you got divorced after 3 years of marriage. Would you still feel entitled to a portion?
Yes. The reason being is there should be some pay off in any marriage. People who have very little assets still collect. Maybe it's only the DVD collection, but there is still a pay off. Now in terms of the money and assets that this hypothetical man has, I would not say that I'm entitled to half but something for sure! A home and maybe some of the cash. Not saying he would need to support me forever, but again, don't leave me high and dry! I would not leave him high and dry if it was the other way around.
I think that lack of a prenup makes rich people targets for gold diggers and mercenaries. Ask Britney Spears. She had to pay Kevin Federline $13 million and they were married for all of 3 or 4 years.
I would not say that I'm entitled to half but something for sure! A home and maybe some of the cash. Not saying he would need to support me forever, but again, don't leave me high and dry! I would not leave him high and dry if it was the other way around.
Let's put some numbers and facts to this. Don't know where you live, but pick one of the 6 most expensive markets in the US (SF, LA/OC, SD, NY, DC, Bos)* and you have a vanilla house that costs $ 700,000, probably purchased in yesterday's dollars. The male makes an upper middle class income in a corporation. The female makes a middle class income. There might be a kid or two. You divorce and the fault lies with both of you. You are entitled to the home and he has to go out and rent? Really? The way I look at it is that you have to sell the home, divide the proceeds (tough in today's market) and you BOTH have to rent...or buy a dinky condo.
* total population of these metro areas combined is 45 million people, so 15% of the US population; thus, this represents a lot of people.
I am sure you mean well but untill you end up in divorce court you really have no idea as to what you would do. Divorces can be messy.
You say you would not leave him high and dry but say that when he's sitting in the court room with his new younger babe...........that he cheated on you with.
Quote:
Originally Posted by dvcgal
Yes. The reason being is there should be some pay off in any marriage. People who have very little assets still collect. Maybe it's only the DVD collection, but there is still a pay off. Now in terms of the money and assets that this hypothetical man has, I would not say that I'm entitled to half but something for sure! A home and maybe some of the cash. Not saying he would need to support me forever, but again, don't leave me high and dry! I would not leave him high and dry if it was the other way around.
Let's say you become involved with someone that has signifigant financial assets. Not a whole lot, be enough to where they have no financial worries or concerns.
They had their assts before you became involved. They want to protect their assets and ensure that they are not wiped out in the event of a divorce.
Would you be offended if your spouse asked you to sign a pre-nup?
Edit: One person has assets and the other does not.
PS: Notice I did not say he/she. It could be either or doing the asking. The gender is not important.
When I was younger, I did not like the Pre Nups & thought it was like a lack of trust. I now feel much different. I feel that anything the couple get's while married they can keep. If either came into the marriage with their family momento's, that is the person to get them.
If there is a child from a previous marriage, that has to be taken into account too.
i would not be offended. in fact, i expect to sign one before getting married. you have to cover your butt because you never know what might happen. as i said before, they're a necessity in today's times
I'd have no problem signing a pre-nup if he had assets he wanted to protect. If he came into the marriage with a million dollars and a 10,000 sq. ft. house he shouldn't have to worry that I'd take half. Also, I have my own house, a well paying job, and a few other assets of my own (401K) that I'd want to make sure were still mine if the marriage ended. Heck if I can find a guy with enough assets to want a pre-nup, good for me I don't want a guy with boat loads of debt and no assets to protect.
I am sure you mean well but untill you end up in divorce court you really have no idea as to what you would do. Divorces can be messy.
You say you would not leave him high and dry but say that when he's sitting in the court room with his new younger babe...........that he cheated on you with.
Acutally, been there and done that and left with my child! Thank you! Gave him everything!
I started over!
Don't ask a question, get a response and then not accept the response given. I am telling you what I have done and what I will do. I have learned from my mistakes and will never be put in a position like that again!
Oh...and he cheated all the time!!! Could have cared less! Still got alimony but left all other assets in the wind!
And just so you know, the alimony stopped after 6 months, was rolled into child support and that was the end of that.
All I have ever received from my former spouse is child support.
I gave him everything except our daughter.
You never said nor made mention of you having "been there done that" in your posts to me. Now that you mentioned it, it gives me a better understanding.
I was responding based what you posted to me, nothing more. You never mentioned your previous divorce in our exchanges, so how was I supposed to know you've "been there done that" ?
Quote:
Originally Posted by dvcgal
Acutally, been there and done that and left with my child! Thank you! Gave him everything! I started over! Don't ask a question, get a response and then not accept the response given. I am telling you what I have done and what I will do. I have learned from my mistakes and will never be put in a position like that again!
Oh...and he cheated all the time!!! Could have cared less! Still got alimony but left all other assets in the wind!*
Ehhhh, at the risk of getting a nasty gram, I'm calling for a group hug!!!
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I don't want a guy with boat loads of debt and no assets to protect.
