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Old 02-13-2009, 05:12 AM
 
Location: Whoville....
25,386 posts, read 35,466,787 times
Reputation: 14692

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Quote:
Originally Posted by PassTheChocolate View Post
As is clearly stated in the title, these are thoughts. And because I can.
If it really didn't bother you, you woudln't be thinking about it or asking our opinion on it. I've met many people who don't share my beliefs. We, say our good byes and never think of each other again. The problem is solved once they're out of your life. Now people who don't share our beliefs that we're stuck with in our lives, I could see discussing. They're a problem.
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Old 02-13-2009, 05:17 AM
 
Location: Whoville....
25,386 posts, read 35,466,787 times
Reputation: 14692
Quote:
Originally Posted by Twinkle Toes View Post
Why do YOU care? You're the one harrassing her about it. Get a grip, dude!
Not harassing. Just pointing out the obvious. We don't dwell on things that don't bother us. We dwell on those that do. What someone who is incompatible with us thinks of us shouldn't be one of them. It's not like she's facing daily criticism from this person. She needs to figure out why she can't let it go. There's something about it bothering her or she wouldn't be concerned enough about it to post about it.

Bottom line is, to each his own. If you're not part of my life, I really don't care what you think of me. You'd have to be making some kind of trouble for me for me to care that you don't like my beliefs. For example, my sister and I are issues for each other because we both think the other one is nuts. We have to see each other at family functions. So we have to deal with the issue. If she were as stranger I met, I'd never give her a second thought. She and I are too different to be friends if we weren't related.
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Old 02-13-2009, 05:27 AM
 
Location: Connecticut
1,461 posts, read 4,859,620 times
Reputation: 1668
I felt bad that you had such a negative experience while enjoying yourself singing at a Karaoke bar. There are so many "right fighters" in the world today. Everyone has an opinion and everyone wants to be the one who makes the most valid point. I always try to listen to what folks are saying and until I can actually SEE that there is bad stuff going on, I keep my opinion to myself. I have been kicked around verbally most of my life and it took me a very long time to learn the why of it all and how to handle it...and...I am a 61 year old woman with a wealth of experience in the world of what constitutes a bad "rap" and what doesn't. Bottom line is, if you like singing Karaoke, like socializing in the bars, you know your son is well cared for and is happy and healthy what do you care what that "right fighter" says? God gave you a gift to be able to sing and how you choose to use that gift is up to you because he also gave you a brain to think with.

I have a friend who is a devout Jehovah's Witness. I love him to death but sometimes that drum they beat wears on my nerves. He came to our home and immediately started to preach about death, the devil, bad catholics...the works. He told us that when they come knocking on our door on Saturdays as they do, they mark down in a book what kind of a response they got from us. I felt the hairs on my neck bristle but I didn't say much to him at this point except..."Now, how would you react if I as a Catholic, came knocking at your door preaching the Catholic way?" He got very confused and couldn't speak for a second.

Sometimes you have to fight the right fighter back with pure logic and a taste of their own...it worked in this case.

Keep on singing.....God doesn't care you like Karaoke and find someone who likes the same things you do!
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Old 02-13-2009, 10:11 AM
 
22,007 posts, read 19,112,807 times
Reputation: 18133
Quote:
Originally Posted by PassTheChocolate View Post
They insist their belief system to be the way, the truth and the light. They not only deny themselves the opportunity to learn something new, they alienate those who know, first hand, that these differences actually exist.

I have been talked down to, called a liar, stupid or accused of not admitting the truth about myself.

I don't understand the logic in "winning" an argument or having to be right. Do you want to appear to be better or do you actually want to be better - not by agreeing with others or giving in but by opening up to the possibility that there are other truths outside of your own.
i agree with this post

i can understand and accept that people do things differently, live life differently, have different beliefs, thoughts, ways of doing life. To me it is fascinating to hear these because it opens my mind and increases my understanding from the inside, as only a person experiencing something can truly describe it. So i benefit, i grow, i learn

many people go beyond "i disagree" and "i do things differently"
and jump to "you are stupid, wrong, an idiot" or "you are bad,evil, and a liar"

that's the part I don't get.

in my experience (and you see it a lot on a forum like this one) such people get angry, feel threatened and attacked somehow that a different way from theirs makes their way wrong or bad. They have to attack the person to justify their own choices. I agree it's very offensive and unpleasant to be around such unhealthy, toxic behavior.

that's probably what the term "narrow mind" refers to, one that can't let in a multitude of differing views and hold them in a place of acceptance, validity. Also it is a measure and reflection of how much a person accepts themself. The higher level of self-acceptance we have, the higher level of acceptance we have for others. So a person that can't accept others, and has to name-call, bash, insult, and deprecate, really loathes themself and is mired in self-hatred.

thanks for this post

Last edited by Tzaphkiel; 02-13-2009 at 10:23 AM..
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Old 02-13-2009, 01:51 PM
 
3,440 posts, read 8,029,992 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PassTheChocolate View Post
In my dealings with people, I have come across too many inflicted with "box thinking". They insist their belief system to be the way, the truth and the light. They not only deny themselves the opportunity to learn something new, they alienate those who know, first hand, that these differences actually exist. I have experienced outside the box. So, I can attest to there being other truths and realities.

I have been talked down to, called a liar, stupid or accused of not admitting the truth about myself, by total strangers. It doesn't make the truth any less so. It's similar to being told I am a 65 year old Swedish woman, when I know I'm not.

For instance, I have a black belt in karaoke. It usually takes place in a bar. A guy I started dating, as a result of meeting in a karaoke joint, proceeded to preach to me that I should be singing at church, not at a bar in front of a bunch of drunken losers, and God didn't give me this voice to abuse it. He also said that no mother leaves their child at home to go singing at a bar. I told him that I don't go to church, so I would have no desire to sing at one. And I would have brought my child with me, but he doesn't like the smoke. I was then labeled a horrible mother and an aetheist. He then became history.

Fact is, he was wrong, 150%. All the insults, projections and pontifying are not going to change the fact that my son was perfectly fine, I am a great mother, I was not abusing my voice by singing at a bar and I am not an aetheist.

I don't understand the logic in "winning" an argument or having to be right. It doesn't make the issue a reality. It doesn't make one legitimately smarter or better. Do you want to appear to be better or do you actually want to be better - not by agreeing with others or giving in but by opening up to the possibility that there are other truths outside of your own.

Sometimes, people just suck and they're stupid and I just don't want to play with them.


I wish there were more people in the world who think like you because things would be much better off.

I say this because this thinking "outside the box" that you are talking about is not considered normal because from the moment people start attending school they are heavily conditioned to be trained how to think and take orders.

Everybody lines up to enroll in these schools but nobody takes the time to really understand the true purpose of it. The true purpose of school, that was set up by the elite, is to condition the masses in there thinking and the punishment is that if you don't go along to get along then your ostracized and wont be able to get a job.

So at the end of the day, all these people that you meet who can't even take a moment to think about what it's like in your shoes are pretty crystallized in there thinking and there is not much you can do about it but move on... ...



YouTube - John Taylor Gatto - State Controlled Consciousness
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Old 02-13-2009, 01:57 PM
 
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 19,976,957 times
Reputation: 9417
Quote:
Originally Posted by Morphous01 View Post
I wish there were more people in the world who think like you because things would be much better off.
Life would really suck if everyone thought the same. Even if I don't agree with someone I still like to hear their thoughts, it gives me creative ideas in some of the things I like to do.

Also, I think a lot of people confuse disagreeable views with boxed thinking. Not saying the original poster is, just that it does happen. As long as someone isn't bludgeoning me (which it sounds like the O/P experienced) with their views I don't mind hearing them.
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Old 02-13-2009, 02:53 PM
 
3,440 posts, read 8,029,992 times
Reputation: 2402
Quote:
Originally Posted by Public_Newsense View Post
Life would really suck if everyone thought the same.


Public Nonsense J/k, What world do you live in because the sucky world that you are talking about is already here? Most people already think the same. As far as the OP she thinks outside the box and seems to form her own conclusions and that's why I said what I said.
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Old 02-13-2009, 03:06 PM
 
Location: In my skin
9,230 posts, read 16,517,749 times
Reputation: 9174
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ivorytickler View Post
Not harassing. Just pointing out the obvious. We don't dwell on things that don't bother us. We dwell on those that do. What someone who is incompatible with us thinks of us shouldn't be one of them. It's not like she's facing daily criticism from this person. She needs to figure out why she can't let it go. There's something about it bothering her or she wouldn't be concerned enough about it to post about it.
You know more about me than I do. This happened 10 years ago. It was memorable enough to make an example of it, that is not dwelling. But I'm sure you are going to insist that it is, because you are a classic example of the "box thinking".

Quit while you're behind. Your education is slipping.
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Old 02-13-2009, 03:09 PM
 
Location: In my skin
9,230 posts, read 16,517,749 times
Reputation: 9174
Quote:
Originally Posted by Morphous01 View Post
I say this because this thinking "outside the box" that you are talking about is not considered normal because from the moment people start attending school they are heavily conditioned to be trained how to think and take orders.
Yup. Power to the Sheeple.
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Old 02-13-2009, 03:09 PM
 
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 19,976,957 times
Reputation: 9417
Quote:
Originally Posted by Morphous01 View Post
Public Nonsense J/k, What world do you live in because the sucky world that you are talking about is already here? Most people already think the same. As far as the OP she thinks outside the box and seems to form her own conclusions and that's why I said what I said.
I guess that accounts for all the arguments here on CD, everyone thinking the same. Gotcha!
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