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Ouch! That's a tough one. Ya might like 'em and it lead to long term (meaning even marriage) and then their debt becomes your debt. Lots of arguments over money are had during a marriage (or so I've heard; I've been married almost 9 years and I've never had an argument about money/ finances).
I dunno... are you the type of person that if you fall head over heels and could see yourself marrying this other person... are you able to never resent them for bringing so much debt to the relationship?
It'd only be fair to that other person that you know that debt exits and you don't hold it over their head or grow to resent them for it.
Date? Why not? Her debt is not mine. The origin of the debt is irrelevant, too. However, if she asks me to help pay for it, then there will be problem.
But I'll say this, based on my experience. Unless a person is in that kind of bind because of extraordinary events, then that kind of debt is really symptomatic of far deeper problems. In this case, $100,000 of debt to earn a bachelor's degree (I'm assuming we're not talking about a graduate degree here, right?) indicates a serious lack of realism, and a total inability to handle money. I mean, did the person in question attend an incredibly expensive private school way beyond his/her means? Did this person not work a job or get financial aid? I worked full-time through a pretty steep private college (Along with a partial scholarship and earning grants), and even sold my blood and hocked my beloved drum set to pay my tuition. But I got through without borrowing a dime. And I'm glad I did, because I really struggled my first 2-3 years out of school and a student loan payment on top of my living expenses would have just been almost impossible to make.
In an ideal world, money shouldn't have anything to do with love. But when you have a partner in a relationship who is irresponsible with it, you very quickly lose trust, and become resentful for having to work doubly hard to pay for that person's profligate ways.
In short, that kind of debt wouldn't be a dealkiller in and of itself. But it's definitely a red flag that needs to be monitored. Because if the relationship gets serious, the possible character issues that might have caused this kind of indebtedness in the first place could surface again and again in other ways.
if someone you met had $100,000 in student loan debt and their degrees didn't provide much income would you still date them?
You're not dating my cousin, are you? She goes to an expensive film school in Santa Monica and is going to be about that deep in debt by the time she graduates.
The only advice I can give you is not to ever mess with Sallie Mae.
I might date them and get to know them, but in order to consider marrying them I would have to consider a few factors: level of ambition, work ethic, other debts (besides student loans). Even in a traditionally low paying field an ambitious person can be successful. I would be more concerned about what this level of student loan debt says about their common sense and ability to handle money. If there are no other warning signs in this area then I would probably be willing to overlook it if I thought they had potential in every other area. They would, however, have to be committed to coming up with a written plan for us to pay off the student loans over the next 5-7 years.
If their parents had a high income, it's not fair to be upset about the student loan debt because they wouldn't have been able to get financial aid due to their parent's income.
As long as they are working to pay it off and are making an effort to pay it off, that's fine. If they are just trying to put it off and ignoring it, that's a different story.
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