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So my roommate's girlfriend just broke up with him, and I wanted to ask the women out here if this makes sense. I learned (through my g/f talking to his now ex-girl) that she changed signing her emails and letters from "I Love You" to "Love, (her name)" in the last couple of months, and that was clearly a sign that she was having some doubts.
Neither me nor my roommate can see a difference in these two things. Is this just us, or are we missing something we are supposed to pick up from the women we date? Are we stupider than most men, or is something like this a gender thing?
How much else do women try to tell men that we miss because we don't get these little 'codes' you use?
You guys are not stupid. You will go through life trying to figure out us women and we will go through life figuring out men. It's all part of life.
Did she tell him she loved him in person or was it just through email? I don't see a difference in signing emails with love or I love you. I would be more concerned if your roomate was being told in person he is loved.
For the girl to have second thoughts for a couple of months is a long time but change in behavior and attitude are big time clues.
Last edited by songinthewind7; 08-08-2007 at 02:29 PM..
Reason: spelling
Everytime time I emailed my ex, I always signed them differently. Sometimes - love always, I love you, Luv u, whatever... The point is my feelings didn't change, I just wanted to keep things fresh and not so boring. And, sometimes I was just busy doing other things and didn't sign them at all. And when they did change, I didn't use hints in an e-mail. I don't think you should have picked up on "hints" because of e-mail signings. Did you notice any change in her behavior with you, towards you? That is the most noticeable hint I can think of. And, if she was trying to give you hints, what were they about? Find out why she felt the need to give you hints and why she wasn't upfront and honest with what she wanted or what she was feeling. Sounds to me like you need a "closure" or "lay-it-out-on-the-table" conversation.
That "hinting" business sounds way too cryptic to me. People don't need hints, they need to have some respect for the other person, grow a pair, and tell the other party that their feelings have changed or that they have doubts about the relationship. Fear that there will be a confrontation, or that the person will be hurt, or that they will freak out are not good reasons for avoiding having an honest conversation and needlessly leading the other person on...that's just procrastinating.
Sounds to me like the ex was trying to alleviate her guilt over the breakup by shifting some of the blame to the boyfriend, charging him with some responsibility for not picking up on the "hints"..!
So my roommate's girlfriend just broke up with him, and I wanted to ask the women out here if this makes sense. I learned (through my g/f talking to his now ex-girl) that she changed signing her emails and letters from "I Love You" to "Love, (her name)" in the last couple of months, and that was clearly a sign that she was having some doubts.
Neither me nor my roommate can see a difference in these two things. Is this just us, or are we missing something we are supposed to pick up from the women we date? Are we stupider than most men, or is something like this a gender thing?
How much else do women try to tell men that we miss because we don't get these little 'codes' you use?
I wouldn't exactly call the change from "I love you" to "Love, (her name)" a sign. I mean, your room-mate's ex might have done it intending it to be a sign, but just as many girl do that without having any secret meaning. If chicks do have a hidden agenda when they change things like that it's usually because they're trying to cool things down between her and the guy so that it seems less random when she finally does end it. BUT, her changing from "I love you" to "Love, (her name)" doesn't necessarily mean anything. Don't stress over every little detail like that or you'll drive yourself crazy.
There is no diffence on that signature.
Its not even important.
To make it so, makes you guys paranoid,and thats breakup material.
Im married now but if my previous g/f's had been that paranoid, I would stop dating them, or find out at least why they are going this nutty route.
Come to think of it I have. I had a girl I dated at most twice.
Twice only because she 'presumed' we had a relationship of some sort after only two dates, and was upset I didnt call her one Friday night.
I stated, um, I am working on projects (true too) that needed to be finished (I was still going for a B.s. degree).
Her attitude, was enough to dump her on the spot and not even consider trying to work it out.
2 months is a irrelevant amt of time too... I dated my wife for 18 months before we even fooled around (mostly because i was still dating other girls, and was gunshy from marriage #1).
Too often people read into stuff a lot that is not even close to valid or relevant.
I for one hate manipulation and have been able to 'really' see it happening, and that is what I get paranoid about. Often its a break up thing for me.
Exception are what I call, dates for 'purpose', such as a friendship date where I am helping somebody for a reason (resumes, relationshippatching-helping them with another person, tasks needed). Shooting I even had a friend who was just a kissing friend when me or her was having down troubles. We did nothing much except talk about our dates with others, etc.
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nope
