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Look it's a screwed up society! I work at the worlds largest retailer. Wanna steal from us? When we politely ask you to come back in the store to check your bag ignore us...WE CAN'T TOUCH YOU! And the criminals know this!!!
The lawyers have got my company so scared of a lawsuit that they endure stealing as acceptable...they're only real concern is catching the employees! And Many people get a job there and get tired of watching the public walk out the door scott free and it builds a resentment against the company. And they start stealing, they see the company treats the customer FAR BETTER than the employee.
Same thing with gas stations...we're all prepaying for the people who drive off! We're all penalized because society/government won't penalize the criminals! And people get sick of it.
Marriage breaking up leads to MOST of our youth problems. Here's the answer...you pay a fee to GET MARRIED. Make em pay a fee on the way out especially if they have kids...a large fee based on assets...let's say 60% of all marrital assets! You'd see a lot of people stay married then!!! Why should the good people/society at large have to pay for ALL the societal costs a marriage breaking up eventually encompasses? I'm talking the kids failing several years of school. The drug and alcohol treatment..the tying up of the courts in custody.
OK but what about the single parents? That's simple too..you have the right to have a dog, you have the right to havce a cat, you have the right to have a goldfish...but in each case...you pay to do that! Simple answer...$30,000 per kid! No acceptions..per parent! Don't want to pay? Don't have sex!!!! And I know, we'll be tying up the jails with unwed mothers...hey i'll bet sean john and nike wouldn't mind hiring jail moms for .50 an hour instead of asians! Heck...we might even have... Attica jail...sponcered by Cathy Lee attire!
Uh huh. More government involvement in our lives, and more money being arbitrarily taken away and misused, all to keep people married who don't want to be that way and should be allowed to gracefully separate. You realize that your oh-so-clever plan would probably cause a huge spike in spousal abuse, adultery, and all sorts of other bad things?
Uh huh. More government involvement in our lives, and more money being arbitrarily taken away and misused, all to keep people married who don't want to be that way and should be allowed to gracefully separate. You realize that your oh-so-clever plan would probably cause a huge spike in spousal abuse, adultery, and all sorts of other bad things?
Are you kidding? $40,000 FINE FOR ADULTARY!...here's the resultant commercial....
Hi i'm dog, the MARRIAGE PI! Think he/she's cheating? Our staff of 200 will imeadiately investigate! We take all cases PRO bono! (they get 50 percent of the fine!)
Spoucal abuse...$100,000 fine/ 5 years in prison...and the public person who reports it gets half! Oboy you'd have every street thug, bad boy in a bow tie in a week and kneeling in the front pew praying! Running away from their girl friend and saying "no laticia, not without a condom!!"
But noooooooo...instead of a super strict snap on society run riot we got an a-clown handing insurance companies and lawyers trillions in a throw money at the problem attempt...instead of collect money from the PROBLEMS, idea going.
basically everybody wants the freedom to have 40 kids, and steal gas, fornicate like a rabbit, and spread disease around...or we'd already do these things.
IMO, people are asked to make decisions that will affect the rest of thier lives during thier early adulthood. most people dont even know who they are by the time they graduate from college. I mean really. Are we the same at 21 as we are at 31? By the time we know who we are and our parteners know who they are, we have been married for 10 years and have 2 or three kids and a dog and a house.....then what? We wake up and see that this isnt as fufilling as we thought it would be. or this partner isnt who I thought she/he was.
IMO, it should be difficult to get married when you are young. All the items that come up in a divorce should be discussed prior to reciving a marriage license. Young people should be asked the hard questions on parenting, readiness for monogomy...... Prove you are ready for marriage.
If it is difficult to get married, then people, IMO, would be less likley to give up on a marriage, and find a way to make it work.
What do you think?
I had to smile when I saw the title of your post. I've been saying the exact same thing for many years!
Geez, when I was 17, I was a bridesmaid in my neighbor's wedding and the groom asked me out to have lunch and play tennis the DAY BEFORE the wedding! I told my mom about it and she said, "Well, looks like that marriage won't last!" And it didn't. (I didn't go out with the groom, btw.) I've been skeptical of marriage since then.
Last year, my state started a marriage preparation program called Two-gether in Texas. It's not mandatory but it's highly recommended. I hope it opens up some eyes and gets these couples to wake up and maybe back off before it's too late.
Personally, I think that government should stay the hell out of it. The only thing government should do is recognize the marriage for purposes of property, credit, and wills. Anything else smacks of social engineering. What's more, the courts are choked enough as it is. Are you really advocating finding jobs for a few hundred thousand more lawyers and bureaucrats?
I dont like gov. interference either but the government is already in it thats why we have a marriage license. Without one you have no legal right to property, SS benfits, medical insurance, decision making, etc. The might actually cut down on the amount of cases before the court. Im just thinking since its so easy to obtain a divorce, you just want out, give the attorney $$$, wait, fight bicker, wait, fight bicker, give the attorney more $$$, include the usual "reasons" for divorce, which dont mean squat. In the license, make it a real legal document with true consenquences that can be upheld in court. Just thinking this might make people take marriage more seriously it they know they cant just turn their backs on it on a whim.
Im not talking little stuff like eating with your fingers. What do you expect from the marriage contract? Your spouse be faithful, that they dont beat on you, that they provide finanically or keep the home clean, or whatever. Im saying if you prove they break these conditions that is the only grounds for divorce and a fine or jail time. Thus one could not file for divorce because their so eats with their fingers or just decides they dont want to be married anymore. Just a thought. What do you suggest.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Coolhand68 Marriage licenses should be renewed like driver's licenses. Every five years you can take a long hard look at one another and say "Do we really want to renew this?"
Now THAT is a logical idea.
Yeh, or in 5 years just say the heck with it I dont want to be married anymore, which is pretty much how it is now. If you dont want the commitment, dont get married.
But hey, science has long recognized that of the 5000 or so mammalian species on this planet, only a very tiny handful of them are truly monogamous, and humans aren't one of them. Neither are our primate cousins. Why? It's not genetically beneficial to the species. \
That's fine .......... if you think we're purely "mammalian". I think we're more than that.
I know plenty of monogamous couples of all generations; I don't think we're abnormal.
Uh huh. More government involvement in our lives, and more money being arbitrarily taken away and misused, all to keep people married who don't want to be that way and should be allowed to gracefully separate. You realize that your oh-so-clever plan would probably cause a huge spike in spousal abuse, adultery, and all sorts of other bad things?
I said in the Title: EASY to get divorced. Right now its a hellish nigtmare! Brought on by government laws and all the things you complain about! Best intrest in the children? Whos children? not mine!
That's fine .......... if you think we're purely "mammalian". I think we're more than that.
I know plenty of monogamous couples of all generations; I don't think we're abnormal.
Where did I say there was anything WRONG with being monogamous? I said it wasn't how humans tend to be, and that there's nothing wrong with that, either.
What you're trying to do here is force your own personal set of values onto others who frankly shouldn't have to live like that just because you say so. That's repugnant to me on so many levels. Should I be able to force you to do something, simply because I think that's how things should be? NO!
Now as far as those monogamous couples you know...ever had any one of them lose a spouse and remarry? Do you think absolutely none of them would remarry if their spouse died? Were every single one of them, both men and women, virgins when they got married?
THAT is what true monogamy is. One mate, forever, that's it. No remarrying, no sex before marriage or after the death of a spouse, nothing. That pretty much excludes most people on the planet.
People get divorced or break up, they would still get married. Wouldnt kill the institution at all.
Sure it would. If you put so many hoops in front of people to jump through that it would require hiring a lawyer and a team of accountants, going to court seventeen times, submitting a "business plan" that will become useless in a year or so, skipping work/school to take stupid classes that will charge you an arm and a leg for tuition, waiting 2 years for administrative processing, undergoing 3 FBI checks, writing to one's senator or congressman for help to find out wtf your application is, and waiting another 18 months for your application to be processed -- most people will just say f- it, especially since no one can prevent them from simply living together. FYI, many Western countries are suffering from a profound decline in marriage rates. The institution is already dying -- so I guess the perfect solution is to make it that much harder to get married. [/end sarcasm]
2mares: It's very easy to be dismissive about other people's divorces. One's own divorce, however is always a big deal. And in my experience, most people who divorce do take marriage very seriously -- in many cases they divorce because they take marriage very seriously.
I don't know what divorce law is like where we live, but it would interest you to know (as a matter of practical experience) that in New York State until 1966, adultery was the only ground for divorce -- and the rules for proving it in court were extremely tough. Not only couldn't you divorce someone for eating with their fingers -- you couldn't divorce your spouse even if he stuck pins in your eyeballs while ramming you with a telephone pole every night. How's that for making people take marriage seriously? Unfortunately, I have to inform you, having such a stringent divorce law did nothing to cut down on the number of divorces. People who wanted out bent over backwards to get a divorce. They traveled to jurisdictions that granted easy divorces (and by the way, one theory is that this is how the whole Caribbean tourism industry got jump-started at the end of the 19th century); spouses colluded to stage adulteries; they submitted perjurious affidavits to court; they petitioned for annulment. In fact, if anything, this law encouraged adultery on the part of people who desperately needed to create a ground for divorce. And, if all else failed, if they were too poor or too lazy to do any of these things, they simply split up and lived apart -- but hey, we, the righteous public, can pretend they are still "married" because there is no formal divorce. When the law was amended in 1966 to add more grounds (though NY remains a "fault state"), the number of divorces among New York couples remained even.
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I told my mom about it and she said, "Well, looks like that marriage won't last!" And it didn't. (I didn't go out with the groom, btw.) I've been skeptical of marriage since then.
