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Old 04-08-2009, 01:02 PM
 
Location: Texas
8,064 posts, read 17,982,980 times
Reputation: 3729

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr Floyd View Post
Our word and everyday actions should be enough. The problem is that there are too many untrustworthy and insecure people out there so they seek supposed security elsewhere.

In essence, civil marriage is a contract that gives some legal level of security to a woman. It does not appear to hold any obvious benefit to a man in today's climate other than to perhaps keep a woman from leaving due to a supposed lack of commitment.

Many men I speak to these days are asking "why" when asked about marriage. Perhaps this is because they are realizing marriage guarantees nothing even when done in a church under God's gaze. Perhaps they have heard too many stories of men getting royally screwed in divorce court. Perhaps they are gamblers and don't like the odds of marital success. Perhaps they are realizing that we are conditioned to marry out of habit and that relatively few of us even know what it takes to stay married. If you take away the religious aspect of it, there might be a case that children is no reason to get married.

Just like the ring, the marriage certificate, other than the aforementioned legal aspect, is little more than a symbol.

In the end, we all just want quality companionship. Respect and love from a partner. From the looks of it, these things are hard to come by.
Excellent post! I couldn't agree more!
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Old 04-08-2009, 08:22 PM
 
Location: somewhere south of Canada
2,163 posts, read 4,334,947 times
Reputation: 2581
Quote:
Originally Posted by AliceT View Post
...for better or for worse,
...in sickness and in health,
...til death do we part.

Vows to God in front of witnesses just don't seem to mean anything any more. So much easier to give up when trouble brews. I don't get it.
Vows do mean something to a lot of people. The problem arises when only one person in the marriage recognizes that there is a problem and is willing to do whatever it takes to "fix" the marriage. If one party just doesn't give a da*n then there's really nothing the other person can do. You can only beat your head against a brick wall for so long.
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Old 04-08-2009, 08:28 PM
 
Location: Whoville....
25,386 posts, read 35,466,787 times
Reputation: 14692
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tropical Trouble View Post
Vows do mean something to a lot of people. The problem arises when only one person in the marriage recognizes that there is a problem and is willing to do whatever it takes to "fix" the marriage. If one party just doesn't give a da*n then there's really nothing the other person can do. You can only beat your head against a brick wall for so long.
This kind of depends on the problem. The bible is very clear on what is and what is not grounds for divorce and I don't think your partner not wanting to work on problems is in there. As far as I know, the church only recognized three grounds for divorce. Adultery, breach of contract and abuse. Other than that, you're kind of stuck with those vows. Well, if you believe them anyway. I gather from the divorce rate that many don't, which is their option I guess. You're not obliged to believe that marriage is for better or for worse and until death do you part just because I do.

Marriage has become pretty meaningless in our society. Some religions still attach meaning to it but they're the ones that frown on divorce.
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