How Much Drinking is Too Much?? (wife, loving, husband, call)
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I am getting a bit concerned about how much my DH is drinking. He says it hasn't changed since we first met which is totally possible as I've never paid attention to what he was or wasn't drinking before.
I think I'm noticing more now because we're cutting back on eating out and trying to keep our eating out bills low so I am really noticing the amount on the check from booze. Also we've been doing an intensive exercise program and have been really careful about what we eat, so that's made me more aware too.
So what I'm saying is that it is possible and even probable that his drinking habits have not changed at all, and that it is me who has changed (in that I am now noticing a lot more).
I enjoy a drink or three - especially out with friends and will happily get merrily drunk if we're at a party or out with friends. I have been doing it less these last few months we've been on the exercise program, but I would say I'll drink every couple of weeks, and maybe get 'merry' once every few weeks.
DH drinks every weekend whether we're out with friends or not. That wouldn't bother me, but I'm starting to think that he drinks quite a lot.
It's not unusual for him to have two or three martinis plus a few beers on a Friday and then again on a Saturday night.
When we go out for dinner the booze bill is often more than the food bill..... by a lot.
My concern is this: We have talked about cutting back on booze when we go out for dinners and stuff because it's so expensive. He always agrees, but the next time we go out we have another big bar bill.
At home he drinks when it's just him and me in the house and I'm not drinking.
I'm not worried about his behavior at all. He doesn't drink and drive, and he's overly loving when drunk - not mean at all.
A lot of the people we know seem to drink quite a lot, so it's definitely not just him.
I grew up with a tea total Mother and my Dad doesn't drink much, so I'm thinking I have unrealistics ideas of what is normal drinking behavior. So can I get some opinions as to what kind of alcohol consumption is normal for a guy?
Is it normal to drink 2 or 3 martinis plus a few beers at home when you're the only one drinking?
Or to have 4 - 7 beers when you're out for a dinner with friends?
On the surface that doesn't appear to be excessive drinking. But my definition of a lot would be any drink that he feels he "needs", and not just wants. When it gets to the point of needing the drink it's a problem. If it affects his health in any way I'd say there's cause for concern as well, but aside from an occasional hangover it doesn't sound like that's the case.
I don' know how old you are but drinking like this over the long haul will take it's toll by the time you are in your 50's (20 years of drinking) It also matters how fast he is drinking, I would try to notice if he is building a tolerance to alcohol
Is it normal to drink 2 or 3 martinis plus a few beers at home when you're the only one drinking?
Or to have 4 - 7 beers when you're out for a dinner with friends?
Thanks for any comments!
I don't drink and am very glad that my wife does not either. But if she did and did not over do it, that'd be ok.
I am going to try to be unbiased here, and think that I am.
It is a bit excessive. 3 out for dinner would be ok with me. 1 martini and a couple of beers at home, anymore than that and I'd be shaking my finger.
it really doesnt matter how much you think is too much...unless your hubby thinks its too much you arent this would be just what they call an excersize in futility.
It is hard to determine if your husband is drinking too much or not just by reading your post. I would probably actually have to be around him in a social situation before it could be determined. How do I know anything about drinking? I divorced an alcoholic who still to this day is drinking beer every day of the week and then some. My ex, would never draw a sober breath for 30 days in a row...decide he needed to cut back and perhaps stop for 3 hours...then right back at it.
If you really want to know if he is becoming alcoholic, I believe AA has an online test to take that determines if you have a problem. It is one of those questionaires that if you answer so many correct you are an alcoholic...etc.
Before you actually start world war III with him, find some info about alcoholism online, take the test for him according to what you know of his drinking habits...then take it from there. Good Luck.
Does he "have" to have a drink when he gets home?
Does he forget what he did when he was drinking?
Does it impact his day to day functioning-job, domestic, etc.
Does he fail to fulfill obligations because of drinking?
Health folks define moderate drinking as 1 or 2, they define what your husband does as binge drinking.
Here are a couple links: Drinking & you - what is drinking moderately?
The question is if he has just one, can he stop? It is causing problems in your relationship b/c he's spending way too much on alcohol. IMHO, I think he may have a problem with alcohol. Am I An Alcoholic?
If he does, hopefully he will get help b/c it only gets worse.
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How much drinking is too much?
