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Well, it's been the case with my so , I've been w her for 17 years, but now I'm fed up, I miss the passion. When I told her I wanted to split, you know what her reaction was ? "oh my my you must be ill, take a rest, don't talk nonsense, you know you can't leave me". I could have been playin' fiddle...that's what I call passive resistance. Anyway, would I have the heart to throw them out, without a job, without a home, at 60 ? of course not.
I'm damned.
I would start feeling guilty if I couldn't return his love with similar passion or love him the way he deserves to be loved. As long as it was just a little bit more, than I'd be fine with it. Then, I would have enough passion and love for him to go around. And I'd find myself trying to match his care and concern for me, to treat him the way he was treating me, which would eventually even things up, I think.
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I hope we wouldn't even have to compare who loves who more...love isn't always something that can be measured anyway. I guess if it came down to it I'd probably rather be with someone who loved me more, lol...maybe that says something about myself?
I would start feeling guilty if I couldn't return his love with similar passion or love him the way he deserves to be loved. As long as it was just a little bit more, than I'd be fine with it. Then, I would have enough passion and love for him to go around. And I'd find myself trying to match his care and concern for me, to treat him the way he was treating me, which would eventually even things up, I think.
And what if you were the one who loved more, because the other person isn't capable of showing love? Sometimes he does things for you to show his love, but usually he is cold and distant, seemingly uninvolved in the relationship and detached. How would that affect you...and is there any hope for HIM?
It's beyond my understanding how one can "love" more or less. To me "love" is an absolute, unmeasurable extreme, the farthest point of affection. Guess it's terminology issue...
ok I want to know some real life experience/examples.. does anyone who settles down with a person who loves you more than you love her/him? are you happy?
thanks
Sure I could, as long as I loved her very deeply -- enough that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with only her. But it's hard to measure love, isn't it? Different people show love differently, and some people are just capable of feeling more love.
I think I'm the one who loves the most in my marriage, but we argue about that.
The only long-term relationship I've experience in which she loved me more, I finally ended because I just couldn't love her enough. I tried, but there was just no magic for me. I figured I'd end up hurting her in the end anyway, and it was better to do it before we had a big wedding, sold a house, quit a job, moved, etc.
There are degrees of romantic love -- even to the same person. In a good relationship the love grows stronger every day; in a bad relationship it wilts and finally dies; in between are all those that go up and down or just stagnate.
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Guess it's terminology issue...
