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What is with so many men making rude and/or inappropriate comments to and about women and thinking it is okay? Then they get upset if you call them on it. I had a man online tell me that he only talks to hot women at work. He was always a cool guy so this seemed ridiculous. He just kept defending it and I asked why he talked to women online without knowing if they were attractive. He had no answer and said he hoped he hadn't ruined things between himself and the women in our chat group.
I can't explain how many times men have said inappropriately sexual or creepy things, subtle putdowns or outright insults, while trying to get me to LIKE THEM. Sometimes it's clearly objectification, as if that is a complement.
One guy called me a racist because I lived in a mostly white state- then asked me out- No thanks, pal.
Just wondering the deal. Someone suggested these are heterosexual mysogynists, who resent their need for a woman, but don't think they are really bad guys.
it's been a while since I've been to the relationship forums, so I guess it won't hurt to see what's going on.
Inappropriate comments like that, and I'm including everything you described in your message, do not belong anywhere in society, and if a man who's trying to win your heart talks to you in such a manner, that should be a red flag.
I would never even think of saying anything inappropriate to a woman, even one that I know very well, it's just not in my nature.
Oh, yes. I have had men say inappropriate sexual comments and jokes to me thinking it makes them look cool. And also, men who get aggressive and find fault with what I am saying or talk over me because they are feeling insecure. And then, there are the ones that talk in that ghetto, rap culture nonsense that is degrading to women, also thinking they sound cool. You know, "hit it, bang it, quit it, chick this, broad that, hoes".
Not all men behave this way. But enough of them do that it gets quite annoying and that's when the b$%^h shield goes up.
When I was younger, I never knew how to handle these types and so I just stood there looking like I was being held up at gun point. Now, I just walk away. Even if they are mid-sentence. I just leave.
There are two guys in my office that are like that and I keep them at a polite (barely) distance and keep my conversations with them very short.
Why is it we always get things with the sexist thing going on? Do you truly believe it is only the males that make stupid comments? If you do.. then you need to look in the mirror.. and please.. replay your VCR (in your brain) and check to see if you are so perfect that you never made a stupid comment.. I know for a fact you probably made a stupid comment or two..
What irks me is the generalization all the time in "men" and "women" is there any way we can sit there and call "that person" on the stupid crap that they did? I mean come on.. not "all" men do stupid crap like that.
While I agree that generalizations suck, there's a difference between accidentally making an insulting comment and bragging about being a jerk.
I see more men bragging about what jerks they are.
However, the most polite people in the world that I know are also men (different ones, of course).
Oh, yes. I have had men say inappropriate sexual comments and jokes to me thinking it makes them look cool. And also, men who get aggressive and find fault with what I am saying or talk over me because they are feeling insecure. And then, there are the ones that talk in that ghetto, rap culture nonsense that is degrading to women, also thinking they sound cool. You know, "hit it, bang it, quit it, chick this, broad that, hoes".
Not all men behave this way. But enough of them do that it gets quite annoying and that's when the b$%^h shield goes up.
When I was younger, I never knew how to handle these types and so I just stood there looking like I was being held up at gun point. Now, I just walk away. Even if they are mid-sentence. I just leave.
There are two guys in my office that are like that and I keep them at a polite (barely) distance and keep my conversations with them very short.
The problem with a b*tch shield is you're going to weed out the decent guys. They'll find someone that's more approachable. The a**holes on the other hand, take your b*tch shield as a challenge and they'll pursue even more. It's a game to them. I suggest you think twice before putting the shield up.
"The Shield" is necessary. Take comfort in the fact that many of the decent guys have sisters and daughters. The decent guys have to warn and protect the females in their family from "That Guy" all the time.
"The Shield" is necessary. Take comfort in the fact that many of the decent guys have sisters and daughters. The decent guys have to warn and protect the females in their family from "That Guy" all the time.
No it's not and you're just going to send any decent guys running. I'll ignore the one with the shield and go for someone that's more approachable. You think you're doing yourself a favor by putting up a shield, but it's counter-productive. You're not weeding out players and other a**holes. You are however, weeding out decent guys.
No it's not and you're just going to send any decent guys running. I'll ignore the one with the shield and go for someone that's more approachable. You think you're doing yourself a favor by putting up a shield, but it's counter-productive. You're not weeding out players and other a**holes. You are however, weeding out decent guys.
It is not necessary to be 100% approachable to meet decent guys. 100% approachable to me, equals desperate. And this tends to make men run away, too. Even the decent ones.
It is not necessary to be 100% approachable to meet decent guys. 100% approachable to me, equals desperate. And this tends to make men run away, too. Even the decent ones.
You obviously don't know anything about decent men. Decent guys don't want someone with a shield up, or someone that's not approachable. If you're not 100% approachable, decent guys won't bother. Players don't care. 100% approachable is not desperate. If men are running away from you, it has to do with your vibe, nothing to do with being too approachable.
You obviously don't know anything about decent men. Decent guys don't want someone with a shield up, or someone that's not approachable. If you're not 100% approachable, decent guys won't bother. Players don't care. 100% approachable is not desperate. If men are running away from you, it has to do with your vibe, nothing to do with being too approachable.
We disagree.
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No thanks, pal.
