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I'm just curious as to what you guys think about the advice the counselor is giving my husband and myself (back in counseling and, I guess, dating for the moment - he does not want a divorce).
The counselors advice is that our relationship be platonic for now. He says that sex can really mess things up when you're trying to work through emotional issues. What do you think of the counselor's advice?
I'm curious because some here have posted they wouldn't date someone for three weeks if the didn't have sex with them and it looks like we're in for several months IF we make it.
Your counselor is spot-on. The feelings of sex can be confused with genuine emotion. Because women intertwine sex and love, this situation is better for you. In order to determine how you really feel, you have to be identify how you feel, not how good is the sex. If your husband really wants to make the marriage work, he'll be okay with creating (or re-creating) a genuine connection that has nothing to do with sex.
In some cases, it might be helpful. Especially if you use sex to solve problems in the relationship. It's only three weeks. It's not like you're going on a hunger strike.
The counselors advice is that our relationship be platonic for now. He says that sex can really mess things up when you're trying to work through emotional issues. What do you think of the counselor's advice?
Sounds reasonable to me. You presumably have some trust and confidence in the counselor; absent some good reason, I'd go with his/her advice.
Sounds reasonable to me. You presumably have some trust and confidence in the counselor; absent some good reason, I'd go with his/her advice.
Yes, I trust this counselor. He's the one who told me not to let my husband move back in in the first place He said this would happen. I think I was too eager to get the kids out of limbo before. I figured if we were working on our relationship it didn't matter if it was under one roof or two. So we'll take his advice and work on a platonic relationship for the next several months.
So far, this counselor (specializes in relationships) been right on all counts. Affairs aren't something that go away just because you want them to. They have a way of repeating like a bad meal. Every time you turn around there's this awful aftertaste and it gets hard to get it to go away.
I'm just curious as to what you guys think about the advice the counselor is giving my husband and myself (back in counseling and, I guess, dating for the moment - he does not want a divorce).
For an intention of giving that failed marriage one finishing coup de grâce, perfect. For any other intention, brain-deadly idiotic.
Weird. Then why in the world you are still married, too busy to go ahead and cut the knot or something? Too big of a knot to cut?
Not everyone wants sex out of a relationship. There are many other reasons to be married besides sex. If it were for sex alone, I wouldn't be married. I'd play the field
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He said this would happen. I think I was too eager to get the kids out of limbo before. I figured if we were working on our relationship it didn't matter if it was under one roof or two. So we'll take his advice and work on a platonic relationship for the next several months. 
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Then why in the world you are still married, too busy to go ahead and cut the knot or something? Too big of a knot to cut?
